2 of 3 of my 13 year old daughters friends are extremely rude, like extremely, to only to their peers but also to myself. I just cant cope with being around them as I find it very difficult not to say something to them. I have tried speaking to one of the mothers and that just seemed to make things worse as the mother then joined in the behaviour.
2006-12-12 06:03:46 · 17 answers · asked by Yo Mum Mum 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Well you just be the adult and rather trying to be a friend with these kids speak with them and inform them that they are not welcome to your home if they choose to be disrespectful of you. I imagine that your daughter will freak out that you could speak with her friends that way but she will get over it. Sad that this child's mother is behaving in the same manner as her daughter but that might help explain where the child learned this type of behaviour.
2006-12-12 06:07:47 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
With teens, it can be very difficult. Coming from a teen herself, I find that extremely rude. I think that talking to her might get her upset(don't know why, it's a teen thing), but not talking to her might let her get her way. I would like to say a few things on this matter. Have you thought that maybe she is stressed from her father having a girlfriend who confronts her?(Not saying it is bad you confronted her.) Is she stressed in any way or is she just completely spoiled? Now, going over the things that she has said. Demanding to change the station in the middle of a conversation is quite rude. I am a teen and I would not have done that, but what I have done before is if no one is talking, the radio is on and a bad dong is on I might say "Dad can you change the station- Thanks." Or she should have asked you. From my experience I wouldn't have even bothered to ask because I knew it was your car. When she said" I'm HOT open the window" I think that that is actually(sorry), but one of the least worst things that she has done. It was rude, but honestly that is the least of the bad things. When you invited her to that party and she said "I'm NOT GOING" was she busy or doing anything? If she is teen and this is written when I think it was written then she might be in the middle of exams and stressed(she still shouldn't have yelled) Maybe when her father explained this did she feel more comfortable answering to him? Also, if you are surprised about her inviting a friend, trust me, this is pretty normal. About at the dinner when she confronted you did she leave the scene and storm out? And was she started by something or out of the blue she just told you two o break up? If it was instigated by something, then this may be the reason. Although, she had no reason to swear in front of guests, in my opinion, this is completely inappropriate. When you aren't fighting with her, honestly, just try to be casual like nothing has happened before. Eventually she will stop telling you to "stop pretending that nothing has happened." I know that I get into a debate with my mum that I get quite upset when she pretends nothing has happened and everything is okay. She should stop bugging you. You can give her a very big lecture, but that probably will make your relationship deplete more that it is. Just say something like " Is that really necessary?" Try not to be too harsh when saying this- it will help. If things got physical, though, that is very bad. I think that that just might have ruined your relationship. If both of you just try really hard you can form a bond and maybe some of her umm ways will clear up. I am not promising anything, but coming from a teen girl this is some direct advice. I honestly hope you two are fine soon. Best of luck, Ash
2016-05-23 00:10:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let me tell you how it was and will be in my house. My brother had a rude friend with no manners. I cannot remember what he said to my father but It was his last time. My father made it clear for him if you are at my house you will respect my wishes and If you cannot understand this then you are not welcome here. You have to remember that you are the one that pays the bills and if you hurt your daughters feelings then oh well. Children are a product of their parents and if the kids are idiots then guess what so are the parents. I would be ashamed to have an ill mannered child. The biggest mistake is for an adult to let a child address them by their first name this breaks down the authority figure and breeds disrespect. I am willing to bet this is part of our problem. A friend of mine has a son that tried this with me and I told him if you cannot adress me as MR. ...... then do not bother talking with me. He now knows how to talk with an adult and to respect them.
2006-12-12 06:17:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why would you not say something to these rude, so called "young ladies"? You have every right too. I suggest that you start helping your daughters select more respectful, appropriate friends to associate with. Chances are, your daughter is behaving in this same way when you are not present. I would put an end to the friendship period. These girls are a poor influence on your daughters.
"Birds of a feather, flock together."
2006-12-12 06:11:45 · answer #4 · answered by kandekizzez 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You do not have to deal with it! You will just have to refuse to let them come over. You have to be the adult and take a stand in your child's life. She may resent you for it at first, but in time, she will see that you only did it for her own good. And will have taught her a valuable life lesson. Tell the other children's parents that you will no longer allow them at your house until they learn some manners. If they want to continure such visits, they will buck up and learn some, if not, then your daughter just doesnt need to be around such people!
2006-12-12 06:09:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't as Spicy g said you are the adult
you also should encourage your daughter to hang around nice kids & tell her you are supposed to treat & speak to other people nicely & tell her they can't come around til they learn some manners & when that happens they can come back
Adults should always act like the adult & control their kids
2006-12-12 08:11:59 · answer #6 · answered by ausblue 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would consider telling your daughter that you don't like her rude friends, that you don't think it's OK to treat people, adults or other kids with that rude attitude and that you worry that their attitudes may rub off on her, and you think she should seriously consider spending time with them or maybe finding some nicer friends. Also, if they are acting poorly towards you or your daughter, speak up! Say "hey, I don't appreciate that attitude." you never know, if no one is pointing it out, they may not realize just how awful they are coming across.
2006-12-12 06:08:12 · answer #7 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Forbidding you daughter to see them will never work, but you can forbid your daughter to bring them to your home. I would also speak to your daughter about why she likes these friends. Explain to her why you feel their behavior is inappropriate and make sure she understands that you will not tolerate her ever acting like they do. Though we can't pick our children's friends, we can try to steer them in the right direction.
You might want to think about signing your daughter up for extra curricular activities where she can meet some nicer companions.
2006-12-12 06:08:50 · answer #8 · answered by MELISSA B 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Listen it's your home, it's your child, get priorities here and gie them the way it is. Do not tolerate the BS from kids. Come on your the adult here!
2006-12-12 06:06:04 · answer #9 · answered by marie1257 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't allow them in your house and avoid being around them. Your an adult, you should know how to avoid unruly kids. They come to your door, they stand outside. They call you don't answer. Come on here folks...
2006-12-12 06:07:42 · answer #10 · answered by www.treasuretrooper.com/186861 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋