We cannot have children on our own. We have been married over 4 years and we have been told it is not likley we will ever concieve due to no sperm in my husband. What is our next step?
Is it better on both parents to adopt a baby with no family DNA or to have one that would have the Mothers DNA and a close resemblence to the father through donor sperm? (you can choose nationality, blood type, heritage, and even see photos now days when choosing a donor)
Would this make the father feel inadequate at sometime? I do not want to hurt our relationship over having a child. He is not shure what to do either. Please Help!
2006-12-12 05:19:56 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
You have many options of what people are telling you to do. But I stand here as a child of God encouraging you as a Christian. Are you going to believe the doctors report or God's report? Pray and seek God, and just as he supplied Sarah (Abrahams Wife) with a child in her barren years he will do for you and your husband. Ask God to restore your husbands sperm so that you both can have that beautiful child you both desire. God makes that which seems impossible, possible through Him. Read Genesis Chapter 16,17 & 18. If God did it for Abraham & Sarah, He will surely do it for you. God is not a respector of persons but He is a respector of Faith. Do you believe that? If so then Recieve it..... In Jesus Name Amen!!!!!
2006-12-12 05:25:52 · answer #1 · answered by unknown 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, I am so sorry that you have to go through this. My wife and I have also been trying to conceive for over two years and have been presented with some of the same questions about how this process aplies to our Christian faith.
The best way I can answer your question is the same way the Bible answers it, be led forth by peace. In other words, if you or your husband are not comfortable with something, then it probably is the Holy Spirit telling you that it might not be the best approach. The most important thing you can do is to continue talking to each other and probably a good Christian counselor. There are many counselors that deal with this type of situation but not all are considerate of your personal faith.
I also hope that you haven't been by a barrage of comments from other Christians that have good intentions but seem to always say the wrong things. Don't let this discourage you! We've had the same problem and it is hard to dismiss those statements but the reality is that these people aren't you! Only you know what you feel and if you feel a certain way (as long as it doesn't contradict scripture) then that is the way you go. By the way, I personally feel that there is nothing in the Bible that would say that insemination from a donor is wrong. Again, you and your husband need to pray about it, constantly, until you feel led by the peace that God gives you.
God bless and good luck.
2006-12-12 13:31:24 · answer #2 · answered by royal_fiction 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cannot say if this will make him feel inadequate or not, you are the only other one that can determine that besides him. Personally I don't think there is anything wrong with artificial insemination, however the best bet is to pray about it. God will lead you in the right direction he wants you to go. I know a lot of people who were in the same boat and decided that adoption was the best thing for their family. There is a radio station here in Houston that has several of its employees going through adoption, it is great and may even be a great resource for info on adoption. It is KSBJ, you can go to ksbj.org they have all kinds of links for things they support and have on air. Good Luck and God Bless!
2006-12-12 13:36:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, I want to thank you for asking this question. My husband and I are going through a similar situation. We had a vasectomy reversal done last year in October and it did not work. Because of our advanced ages (we are both over 35), we have seriously been considering artificial insemination. My husband is alright with the decision but I have this small fear in the pit of my soul that there will be a difference. He has two girls from a previous marriage and I can't help but wonder how he will bond if and when we conceive. He seems to be fine with it so I admit it is all me and my insecurities. We are both christians and have prayed on the situation. We are very comfortable with the choice and I am still working on my little insecurity mentioned above. I also want to thank Godannoin who answered your question earlier. I truly believe that God puts people in your path for a reason and I want to thank you Godannoin for your response. But whatever you and your husband decide, I pray for peace in your decision and most of all a happy and healthy outcome.
2006-12-13 11:39:25 · answer #4 · answered by KAREN B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very personal decision and has no right or wrong answer. The first thing you guys need to do is pray about it and talk to each other open and honestly. Remember, Joseph was not the biological father of Jesus.
I have friends (they are Christians, also) who could not conceive and for them adoption was the answer. They felt that God had a different plan for them. They adopted 3 "hard to place" siblings and have been tremendously blessed by them. I'm not saying they haven't had struggles, but being a parent has its struggles and hardships even if they are biologically yours.
God bless!
2006-12-12 13:48:58 · answer #5 · answered by Sherral 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should adpot a baby with no DNA connection to either of you. I think that you being connected by DNA and him not being so would really hurt their bond. Especially because dad's inevitable feel left out anyway, nevermind if it isn't "his". No matter how good his heart is, that is a huge hurdle to get over and probably impossible. Plus, there are sooooo many kids already in the world, it seems like a better idea to give one of them a loving family.
2006-12-12 13:27:48 · answer #6 · answered by In Luv w/ 2 B, 1 G + 1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I would chose artificial insemination. But if you think he will not see it as his child but only yours, maybe adoption would be the better choice. Then you would both be in the same boat. And I'm sure with AI the dad would feel maybe left out or something sometimes... But it is really something the two of you should decide together.
2006-12-12 13:23:58 · answer #7 · answered by CareBear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See an OBGYN and have a consult as to what other options you have. It might be you could have a child using his sperm, gathering several times, and freezing it to be used in artificial ways later on.
After you see the doctor you both might want counseling so you and feel comfortable in whatever way you finally decide upon.
Best of wishes in whatever you do.
2006-12-12 13:29:47 · answer #8 · answered by Aliz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a fellow Christian let me remind you of the story of Sarah in the Bible. She made a mistake by asking Abraham to father a child with Hagar. That was not Gods will for them and it led to serious problems and anguish for all the people involved. Spend some time in prayer, seeking the wisdom of your Heavenly Father regarding his will for your family. I pray that you will be open to following his plan for you as it will the one that will bring you the most joy and fulfillment in your future. God bless you and your husband.
2006-12-12 19:33:21 · answer #9 · answered by tallgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel very strongly about adoption. There are so many- too many- children w/o homes or families. DNA should be of no issue.
2006-12-12 13:23:00 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋