I am having a hard time with this. Should I lie to my daughter and tell her there is a Santa? I know when I found out I been lied to by everyone I knew and was scammed by everyone it made me not trust anything in life. I really think learning there was no Santa and that I was lied to by everyone I loved for 7 years of my life or so really messed my outlook on life up.
Is it better for a child to have something made up to believe in even though we are lying and instead of teaching morals ect we are teaching out kids to lie.
Or would it be better to always be truthful to a child and let them learn the life lesson that you have to work hard for everything you get. Nothing is free and that lying is not right to do no matter what and you can trust your parents no matter what.
2006-12-12 04:24:02 · 22 answers · asked by pws8us 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
Also Another point. We are celebrating the birth of Christ by breaking a commandment. Thou shall not lie.
Sounds pretty messed up on many parts.
2006-12-12 04:40:53 · update #1
I don't see anything wrong with small children having a little magic in there lives for a few years. It helps develop there imagination. People walk around for a lifetime believing in Jesus. That's a lie too. At least Santa brings them presents.
2006-12-12 04:32:55 · answer #1 · answered by flip4449 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I am suspicious you have larger trust issues than just Santa. Children believe a lot of things that are completely illogical. Its part of being a child. Letting go of your fantasies or at least recognizing the difference between fantasy and reality is part of growing up.
Some of my fondest childhood memories center around Christmas and the anticipation of Santa. I think I was 6 or 7 when I finally admitted I new there was not a Santa, but I don't recall feeling betray. Rather I recall feeling smug that I now knew one of the adult "secrets". (I was sure there were a lot more. BTW why do women usually go to the bathroom in groups? I still haven't figured that one out.)
On the other hand, I also do not believe there is any harm in being completely truthful about issue. Obviously, many cultures do not celebrate Christmas or have Santa, and most of those kids do just fine.
2006-12-12 04:38:43 · answer #2 · answered by Jeffrey P 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you do not feel comfortable with your child believing in Santa, then don't tell her about him.
I cried when I found out the truth, but remember how magical and wonderful it was to believe. I don't want to deny my own daughter such a lovely experience as believing in Santa, just because there will come a day she stops believing. I was always told that the spirit of Santa lives on and on.
Besides, there will be too many opportunities later on for her to learn real-life lessons and disappointment. For now, I will celebrate her innocence and encourage her imagination.
2006-12-12 04:35:13 · answer #3 · answered by LadyJag 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it really is a personal decision. Since you have bad memories from childhood about being "lied" to regarding Santa, maybe you should just explain it. I on the other hand have tremendously fond and warm memories of Santa. I never felt like I had been lied to. My parents explained to me when I was older and found out through friends, that there was indeed a Saint Nicholas at one time.(Greece now Turkey) They went on to explain that now it is just a tradition kept alive to entertain little ones.
I remember hiding in my bedroom listening to this AM radio station on one of those old AM only hand radios. I would listen to the Santa Report. The DJ would give details of how close Santa was to town etc.. I would fall asleep with that radio in my hands. I also remember on year when my brothers and me could not contain our excitement and we tried to wait up for Santa. Dad actually got on top of the house with some bells and he stomped around up there while ringing those bells! Mom said; "Oh no! Santa is here and he knows you are awake! Better get to bed quick!" It was exciting and fun!
(Rambling now) I never once thought of the legend/myth of Santa as a lie. I look back at it as a fun part of growing up. I have passed the tradition to my children and they all have loved it. None has ever expressed that they felt "lied" to. In fact, we set around and share memories from their childhood and mine; of waiting on Santa. Merry Christmas!
Check out this site, it might help you explain the origins of Santa to your child. If nothing else, it is interesting.
http://www.stnicholascenter.org/Brix?pageID=23
2006-12-12 04:43:50 · answer #4 · answered by Gino 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt lie. My parents told me about Santa Claus like they told me about Humpty Dumpty...as a fairy tale. They told me the truth about it and Christmas and they also let me pick out some of the gifts we got for our relatives. I think telling the truth is better in the long run because I always knew what Christmas was really about and i never put any pressure on my parents to get this gift or that gift cause I knew they had to pay for it, it wasn't being brought by some fat guy inna suit. I still had fun every christmas cause I got gifts I wanted and I got joy from seeing people enjoy gifts I helped pick out.
2006-12-12 04:36:23 · answer #5 · answered by Random Nimrod 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one. My husband I struggled with this, too.
I believe it's important to be honest with our children. Pretend is one thing, but a deliberate deceit can shake a child's trust in you. If you can lie to them for years about one thing, what else might you be lying about?
The decision was, we will tell our children that Santa is the spirit of giving. We'll tell them about how he once was a real person, a kindly monk who gave the children in his village gifts on Christmas every year.
So is he real? Yes, as a symbol. But a real person? He once was. Now people 'play Santa' and pretend to be him in honor of his kindness and generosity. We are all Santa.
2006-12-12 04:42:05 · answer #6 · answered by KC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess I don't look at as a lie, more as a tradition. We have the easter bunny, lephrechans, unicorns, etc., etc. Thats what makes childhood magical. When my 10yr old daughter questioned me last year if Santa were real, I told her my special secret. I said that believing in Santa makes xmas magical & even though it's really mom & dad, it's still very fun & special to Believe. She's not scarred & still trusts in me. I think it's all about your explanation. Let kids be kids, they grow up so fast as it is - let the magic of make believe live.
2006-12-12 04:35:04 · answer #7 · answered by Jean 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Go ahead and rip the magic out of the world for your kids. Geesh if you are bitter about it I suggest there is something else wrong with your relationship with your parents. When my son came right out and asked me I said of course there is a Santa, but you don't mind if your Santa is Mom and Dad do you. Because we love you best over anyone else in the world even the north pole. But that was only when he was nearly 10. Why wouldn't you want your children to have magic and wonder in their lives. To use their imagination and believe there is something wonderful to dream about.
2006-12-12 05:28:40 · answer #8 · answered by LAUGHING MAGPIE 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't even remember when I found out about Santa. The meaning of Christmas does not really have anything to do with Santa or gift giving.
My child is nine and already knows who Santa is. No body told her she figured it out for herself.
But you have to do what you feel is right. You are the only one who knows how your child will react.
2006-12-12 04:36:14 · answer #9 · answered by mellijenk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is a tradition in the America to lie about Santa. You do not have to but 89% of Americans do lie about Santa. Do what makes you feel good. My daughter found out about Santa and it did not scar her. But children are different. GOOD LUCK!
2006-12-12 04:34:55 · answer #10 · answered by MOM OF ONE 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋