is this a good poem?

Question

idk, i was bored, and keep in mind im 14 so dont expect it to be perfect, okay!!



One lonely night, commencing from the moonlit moor,
Came a man, knocking, knocking at my door.
“It is time,” He said to me, his face holding a look quite sly.
As perplexed as I was, I managed a reply;
“I am not ready to go, I love where I am.
I will not go with you, inexplicable man.”
Through the window on the top floor I see,
the mysterious man looking right back at me.
Then back towards the darkness, he turned and ran
And not until just the next year did I see the man.
At the pearly gates I looked at him confused once more
And he answered my question look with memoir of the moor
He said then to me, “you did not come when I asked of you.”
And I replied with a smile askew.
“Lord, I did not know it was you.”



word key (for you...illeterates):
moor is a term for a large area of land
inexpleciable is another word for mysterious
askew means crooked



THANKS!!

Answer 1

I like the way you have used "question look with memoir of the moor" though it would not pass my language teacher's sense of correct English usage. Great poem! Your alliteration is good and word imagery excellent. All the very best for your future endeavours.

Answer 2

WOW! I really like this poem. Stylistically, I am hesitant about rhyming, but here it works. I also thought it was a nice twist to add at the end an explanation of who the mystery man was without being blatant. I think a bit of refining and editing will do wonders for this peom (making each line sound similar to maintain readability and flow). Keep up the good work :)

Answer 3

Even though i'm not a big religion lover, i must say the poem is well constructed, especially for a 14-year-old. Being as you asked if it was good or not and not whether i liked it, i will say it is good. :)

Answer 4

Yea, you're good!!!! Naturally talented, I'd say. All it needs is a title.

Answer 5

mmmmm not bad