My husband and i have not been able to get intimate in a week because of my cycle. Last night i told him that i was off while we were watching the saints vs cowboys game. I did not expect any action during the game,i freakin know better. Well during half time he wanted to get close and i was very suprised and excited. During the act he was going really fast and i asked him to slow down but he didn't. He was done in minutes then got dressed and headed back into the living room to watch the game. WTF!!!! He asked me to cuddle with him on the couch infront of the game but i refused and stayed in the bedroom. He came in there acting dumb like he didn't do anything wrong. I told him what a jackass he was and rolled over. He said he would make it up to me in the morning. Well, i was trying to make some noise this morning to wake him up to make it up to me. He woke up and said nothing to me. I left for work still sexually frustrated. How do i give him a clue?
2006-12-11 06:57:58 · 34 answers · asked by micah z 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow, some of that sounds very familiar. You HAVE to communicate w/ him. Explain to him that you have needs too, just like he does.
I grew up w/ brothers who LOVE football so I learned at a young age to try not to expect much of anything from a man during a football game. (In one way, that's pretty good that he gave you some time during half time, some men wouldn't even do that.)
I doubt he's trying to be insensitive to you, he probably just doesn't realize what he's doing, you guys just need to sit down and talk it out.
Good Luck!!!
2006-12-11 07:06:16 · answer #1 · answered by Nina Lee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG!!! You sound soooo much like me!!!! And I thought I was the ONLY wife to get so pissed when I don't get what I sooo need. Well, the way I've found to combat this is....masterbate. And take pictures to show him what he has made you do since he doesn't know how to finish the job! I like to send him pictures over my cell phone, and then it gets him really worked up and he comes home wanting some..well, By then I've already satisfied MYSELF...and so I let him sit it out all night being sexually frusterated himself. To elaborate.....
First off...when he got up and went back to the game and was asking you to come cuddle with him, you should have replied that you would be out as soon as you and your TOY finish the job he started but couldn't finish. That will let him know in no unclear terms that he's screwed up, and you're not going to be one of these women that just rolls over and goes..oh, ok, dear that was nice I guess. YEA RIGHT!
Secondly, when he again refused you this morning...you should have told him again that you are your toys will finish the job, and make sure the job is done right, the FIRST time.
Men don't like knowing they don't/can't satisfy their women sexually. They prefer to live in their minds that they are the perfect sex Gods they think they are. If you actually say the words outloud then they actually tend to hear them more. Even when they know they havent finished their duties, hearing it come from your mouth will get the point across.
2006-12-11 07:10:37 · answer #2 · answered by Sharlala 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could just change your thought process. When he watches the game, either watch it and cuddle (since you and he both did all the dishes before the game). If you have sex at halftime, I guess it will be a quickie (you can have fun with that if you EXPECT it).
You're married so any time is good time. You are just frustrated but is it worth an arguement? I wouldn't make a big deal about it. It's not a big deal to him. He'll take you whenever you're ready again. I'd be a hundred bucks on that.
2006-12-11 07:01:33 · answer #3 · answered by Mama R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he knew exactly why you are upset. Maybe he was just as sexually fustrated from waiting when you were on your period. We as women need to tell men how sensitive our cycle can makes us during sex, especially right after we had it. Don't be too uspet. That is something you can work out with him. Tell him, you need him to not be so rough with the sex. He obviously cared when you left him in the living room by himself, and he left the game for you! That's love I say! lol, a guy putting off the game! But, you can work with this, good luck to you both!
Krazy Libra
2006-12-11 07:03:19 · answer #4 · answered by krazy_libra_from_ac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I go throught the same things with my fiancee! He is also some times so quick for his pleasure but not mine some times, and yes i get really sexually frustated to! The thing i do when he wants pleasure and i am mad about how he is so quick for his needs and not mine! Is i give him the "I have a headache or i am to tired or just not in the mood,"! So i do that for about a week and a half, to where he can not handle it anymore! To that point i am going crazy my self, but i keep control of that not to show him! So then that is when the sex will get good cause he gets all romantic with me!
2006-12-11 07:07:58 · answer #5 · answered by ~*Sweet Pea*~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh! I can relate to your question so much! My husband won't touch me during my cycle either and I get so horny during that time that it is unbelievable!( my husband and i also watched that game together last night) anyways, i think you need to buy a vibrator. that way if this happens again at least you can please yourself. my husband has pulled this same crap. one time i was watching one of my fav shows and he asked me to come lay by him. he then starts touching me and we do it, but it was fast and i didn't get off. he then jumped up ran to where i had been setting, grabs the remote and turns the tv to what he wanted to watch! men are so selfish. you need to start demanding oral sex if you don't get off. that is what i did and now he knows if i don't get off, then he had better get to pleasing me or he will be living in hell for a few days! the way i feel about it is if you are in a marriage, there are two people who need their needs fullfilled. your husband shouldn't be allowed to fill his needs and leave you on empty. he knows better. don't let his dumb act work!
2006-12-11 08:11:42 · answer #6 · answered by adi23 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a GUY!!! Plus, he was watching a football game, that's like the extension of their little member almost. Guys don't really understand intimate time (cuddling, snuggling) etc... unless you talk to him about it. Communication is everything. The next time you're eating dinner with him, tell him that you want him to cuddle with him in bed, (where its warm), and relax (then give him the example of what you told above) and tell him that it's important to you to have that little aftertime together.
The next time he tries to jump you during a football game, don't do it. Like I said, he'll probably be thinking about the game even during sex, so it's ingrained in him....
2006-12-11 07:01:57 · answer #7 · answered by sugar_twilight 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, don't drop clues---sit down and discuss what each of you needs. I'm not surprised you didn't get "full-time" satisfaction at "half-time" because he was obviously still distracted and thinking of the game, so if I were you, I wouldn't set myself up like this when you know he's engaged in his sports habit! He tried at half-time but his actions were disappointing to you, so your lessons learned is to know that when he is practicing his sports game, don't expect him to be on top of his makin' love game. So again, don't drop clues to him, but in an atmosphere away from any distractions, communicate to each other what your needs are and see if that helps.
2006-12-11 07:05:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he try this conventional? if so than confident, he's being thoughtless. i'd desire to comprehend him going out along with his acquaintances as quickly as perhaps two times each week yet that's it. you opt for time for your self to boot as time with him. might it kill him to spend it gradual with you and the little ones? He does not look to have an interest in his relatives and that's unhappy. i might consult with him approximately this, attempt some counseling. If that doesn't artwork than tell him if issues do no longer substitute, your gonna take the little ones and leave. it is not fare to you or the little ones that he acts this type. I for one does no longer positioned up with this type of habit, it incredibly is thoughtless, insulting, unappreciative and unacceptable.
2016-10-05 04:33:53 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men don't need clues. Men need to be told straight up!!!! You should know this by now! Let him know that the quickie was fine but that you would like to more. You knew the game was on, you knew you might not get any, you did and should be grateful for what you got! especially during football season ..lol
2006-12-11 07:01:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋