Ladies....I need your help.....?

Question

I need some advice......I know I've asked this a few times, but the answers seem to stall out after a while and I'm just trying to get some advice from a bunch of different people....
I've read many posts out there regarding different things that turn me on, but my wife won't go near them, (specifically stockings, high heels & anal sex-though I know the latter is really iffy with some women) and it seems like many on here really get into that.
Anyone out there know how to help me? (outside of any snide remarks regarding divorce, looking at porn, etc If we ever do go out..her heels are the first thing off when we get home...even if I try to sweep her off her feet. And this is not all about me...I am asking because we do things her way all the time..she's on top (which I don't mind) and its right before we go to sleep...I love giving oral, but she doesn't always want that.

I'm almost to the point of desperation and asking someone from Answers to help me experience my desires...

Answer 1

I will admit, I do the stockings and high heels only because my husband likes them!
Keep telling her how turned on you are by the stockings and heels! It might help.
As far as the anal, my husband wants me to and I won't. I just can't get over the ick factor and the ouch factor. Sorry, but you wife might never let you do that. I know I wouldn't. (and I don't want to hear about that, it's a personal decision and yes, my prerogative, and I only mention it because I wanted to answer the question, maybe some women feel just as strongly about it as I do)
Anyway, just keep trying with the high heels. Find out if there's anything she wants from you that you are not doing and then do that in turn for her.

Answer 2

In all honesty, me being a woman, a lot of us do not have that sex drive that men have. Was she the same at the begining of the relationship as she is now? I had a big sex drive at the begining of mine and my soon to be husbands relationship, but not anymore. Thing is though I love the hell out of him and regardless if I don't want to or I'm tired, I still do the things he likes to do... dressing up, heels, cut-off hose, anal, etc. How long have you two been together? Maybe the spark is just gone for her or sex-drive is just gone (there are pills to correct that). You may want to suggest a sex therapist if you really think it's a problem. Hope I helped some. Want to talk, just e-mail!

Answer 3

not sure what the question is - i think your trying to find out ways to light your ladies fire - well some things my lover does that do the trick for me... is very attentive to my physical pleasures, watches my facial expressions and comments about what he likes about it ie. when he touches "the spot" he says my mouth goes into a little circle. so I now know that he watches me closely to make sure he is pleasing me. He takes total control in the bedroom (there are times when he lets me take control tho) and commands me into various positions, i like it when i feel secure with somebody forceful. We always have very long foreplay, he takes me to the edge and back a few times before he even enters me. Full body messages, red wine, candles, chocolates all of these help create a very seductive mood. Try going to an adult store and picking up some body paints, cute little nighties or undergarments. How about buying her a "toy" and watch her use it so you know how she likes it, ask her if you can use it on her too. Good luck

Answer 4

Have you tried talking ot your wife about it? What if you tell her you'd like to take her out one night and it will be a night about her... Start off with dinner, come home and try leaving a box for her to open on the bed with some nice lingerie. Leave a note with it to go in the ladies room and put it on.... When she comes out have 2 glasses of wine poured and let her know this night is about her... After you have set the mood, try to try the new things you want to try and afterward let her know how nice that was and you would like more nights like that.... Good Luck....

Answer 5

Okay, so you are trying to see what gets your wife in the mood or what? I say, you should maybe cook her some dinner one night, put on some soft music and tell her that she's important to you and love her. Hold her hand and pour out your feelings to her. If she asks why the sudden spill, tell her you just wanted to make sure she always knew how mych you loved her. I assure you that this will either lead to great love making, or stupendous sex.

Answer 6

try giving her some of the flat bottom high heels they feel better on a womans feet and they dont hurt as much once u do that she might like u and respect u more because ur doing something to help her. the stockings and sex i really casnt hlep u with cause im only 14. but i hope wat i said helps.

Answer 7

Talk to her about how you feel outside the bedroom. Maybe over lunch, or something. Let her know that you like what she does, but that you would like to experiment a little further. But don't keep hounding her about it-that is a HUGE turnoff.

Answer 8

Everyone has their turn ons and offs.Try find out what her fantasies are and try compromise.Otherwise,sit her down and have a heart to heart telling her that you'lls sex life is getting boring and would she prefer if you went somewhere else looking for what she can,but won't give you.Goodluck...

Answer 9

maybe she doesnt like you but is pretending that she does...and if she aint going for anal...get rid of her..if you want an interesting sexual relationship you need someone else...if you love her lots then you gotta deal with what she wants....or maybe shes just cheating on you..

Answer 10

talk to her nicely..but dont force her to do things she refuses to do..in mariage it is all about take and give...

you take only if she do give it to you..
understand??

now change the topic..