I have an 11 year old son, He's generally very happy and outgoing. But has always been the target for bullying, and now the school bully has been picking on him and harrassing him. I have gone to the school and talk to them about it, but it appears as if its become worse, and now he's refusing to go to school. (hes gotten to big for me to carry there) What can I do about this, with out having to homeschool him?
2006-12-11 02:39:04 · 14 answers · asked by StReSsOuT 2 in Education & Reference ➔ Primary & Secondary Education
One of the things you need to do is to help your son learn to deal effectively with the bullying for his own safety and protection. There are lots of suggestions at some of the links I've given.
Keep a written record of all bullying incidents, with times, dates, witnesses, etc.
Advise your son to stay with a group as much as possible - bullys tend to be cowards. Try not to react to the bullying - bullys do what they do for the reaction and feeling of power they get. Do not retaliate.
Consider enrolling your son in a program that will build his self esteem and self confidence. Martial arts programs, scouts, cadets, etc. will all give him a special support group and extra confidence over time. Bullys tend to stay away from confident kids. They tend to bully kids they perceive as weak.
Talk to the school again and tell them this latest development. Ask for a meeting with a representative of the school and the bully's parents and ask that the bully be present. Most bullys do not want this sort of attention. If the meeting happens be calm but assertive about what is happening. It is possible that the bully's parents don't know what their child is doing.
Can you get other parents involved? This bully is probably bothering more kids than just your child.
These are just a few thoughts. Additionally, questions about bullyin ghave been asked hundreds of times on Yahoo Answers. Do a YA search for different versions of your question and you should find a great deal of help.
Go back to the school. You can also go to the police. Your son does not have to tolerate being bullied.
I hope this is of some help.
2006-12-11 03:03:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the bully's parents. If that fails, go to the board of education. If that fails, talk to the bully (but do it alone where you have no witnesses to what you say - I'M NOT KIDDING!) Don't tell your child that you're doing it, either - it will make him feel like a baby. Sometimes, being nice or tactful or whatever you want to call it WON'T WORK WITH 11 YEAR OLDS (or their parents - which is probably WHY the kid is a bully), so coersion is the only way kids/adults like that know how to operate. If you do threaten the child, make sure it's something that you can actually carry out, and be specific about it.
2006-12-11 02:48:13 · answer #2 · answered by teacherhelper 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do.
GO TO the school. Leave your child at home. But go to the school and speak with the principal and guidance counselor. Also arrange a meeting with the bullys parents. Before you send your child back to school. All this should happen with in the next day or two. Don't let it drag on.
If the problem still exist contact the school superintendent then the next step would be a lawyer.
NO CHILD should ever be bullied to a point where he doesn't want to do to school, but it does happen and I saw kids quit because of it.
Best of luck!
2006-12-11 03:11:45 · answer #3 · answered by Studio A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your 11 year old to stop being a sissy, enroll him in karate or something to boost his confidence, and tell his *** to go to school. I can Garuntee you that it isn't as bad as he is letting on, so don't feel bad about it either, he is just using this as an excuse not to go to school, because you let him get away with it a couple times, he figures he has you pinned. If you do go into the school, you will emasculate him, which will make it worse. Give him a get out of jail free card to punch the bully in the face. Thats what my parents did, I was getting bullied, so my dad said that if I defended myself, I wouldn't get in any trouble at home, and would just have to deal with the school's punishment. So I did, and the bulling stopped and I got 3 days off from school it was awesome. Never homeschool your kid, it shelters them too much from the real world, and when they do get out of there own, they become a door mat for the world to walk on.
2006-12-11 02:53:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have you thought about taking him out of the school and putting him in a private or charter school. If the bullying is getting worse and the school isn't doing anything about it, don't make your son go back their. Write a letter to the school board about the problem and think of an alternative solution for his education.
2006-12-11 02:48:53 · answer #5 · answered by BAnne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Too big to carry there? I have a suspicion of why he's being bullied in the first place...Have him take some self defence classes. I'm not talking about sending him to kung fu to wear funny pajamas and get colored belts; take him to someone who will actually teach him how to hurt others, and well. Bullies are cowards, and don't like messing with somebody who will fight back. One good fight will get the school boards attention. Then your kid will probably get kicked out of school, because school boards are usually full of morons, but at least he wouldn't be a victim anymore.
2006-12-11 02:49:33 · answer #6 · answered by Jacob P 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
How about having a conference with the principal, the bully's parents, and yourself? Set up a meeting at school and discuss the current situation.
2006-12-11 02:43:12 · answer #7 · answered by D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Man this is a tough one. If it were feasible I would enroll him in a different school. This would be the perfect time with Winter break coming up. Otherwise I would just encourage him and make sure he knows that you are there for him. Good luck
2006-12-11 02:43:49 · answer #8 · answered by to_sassy4_u 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you know a school should be a safe place my wife a teacher in a inner school and the teacher s will not let this happen,maybe go to the school board,don't let the school bully you out of their Good luck and god bless
2006-12-11 02:50:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the bullying needs to be brought to the attention of the school . . when your child is in school the child should be protected from bulling the bully should be disciplined and if the bully doesn't stop expulsion from school
2006-12-11 03:01:50 · answer #10 · answered by Rainy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋