I think the little 8 year old I watch might be masturbating. She rocks and grunts when she lays down to watch tv. Is this a normal age? And should I talk to her about it or tell her mom? What should I tell her mom?
2006-12-10 13:31:47 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Its normal just tell her to do it in private!
2006-12-10 13:42:38 · answer #1 · answered by mommysforever.org 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children start exploring their own bodies pretty early.
But it's a good idea to mention it to the mother. First to make sure the mother knows, second to make sure she keeps an eye on her, and third so she can start talking to her daughter if she hasn't already. It's possible but not necessarily likely that the girl has been molested. But leave it to the mother to deal with it, not you.
It's more likely that it's completely normal and harmless. But, if the daughter is doing it and you're anywhere near, she might need to be told that masturbation is something that is ok to do sometimes, but only in private.
I know that I was fully aware by age 8 that playing with myself could feel nice. Anyone who thinks that an 8 year old couldn't possibly know this on their own is ignoring the obvious. It does feel good, and it's impossible not to notice, even at that age.
2006-12-10 21:45:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She probably isn't masturbating but just soothing herself. Some kids sit and rock and bounce their heads against the wall until they fall asleep. Body rocking and head-banging are normal behaviors in babies, who seem to find the rhythmic back-and-forth movements a soothing way to fall asleep. They usually have outgrown it by the time they are 8 years old, but maybe this child hasn't outgrown it. You might mention it to her mom, but don't say the word masturbation. Just say that you have noticed that the little girl rocks back and forth while watching TV, and that you wonder if she has always done that? Whatever she is doing, her mother must have noticed it by now also.
2006-12-10 21:40:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anniesgran 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow I've been in the exact same situation...my lil sister's friend was doing it on my couch!!! Our course of action was to tell her mom, don't make it seem like you're disgusted or she'll get on the defensive...break it to her like you are concerned, chances are she already knows or at least has an idea...Some of that is normal it could also be a sign of abuse so you have to be careful how you approach the topic....
Whatever you do definately don't make him/her feel ashamed noone likes to feel bad about themselves...they just need to be told that there is a time and place...in Private!!! It also sounds like mom needs to go ahead and introduce the birds and the bees....weird as it sounds kids are learning super early these days I was totally freaked out when my 9 year old sister came to me with questions about things she definately shouldn't know about!!! good luck!!!
2006-12-11 05:55:22 · answer #4 · answered by whitney h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she might be. . . and might not even know it. She is probably acting perfectly normal. No, you should not talk to her about it or to her mother unless you are concerned about the noises. I would not use the word masturbate with her Mom. Her mom is probably more aware of it than you are.
2006-12-10 21:34:49 · answer #5 · answered by snddupree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, that sounds like she's masturbating. But there is NOTHING wrong with it. Her mom will notice it eventually too, if she hasn't already.
Masturbation is quite common in young children. In most cases, it is considered a natural, normal behavior in children of all ages. Children often begin masturbating at around eighteen months of age. Masturbation tends to peak when children are between the ages of three and five. It then declines in frequency until puberty.
Many parents are surprised and/or shocked to find their children masturbating. Parents should keep in mind that masturbation generally causes no physical harm to their children. In most cases, problems result only when adults overreact.
For parents to deal with their children's masturbation they must know when it is normal and when it might indicate some underlying problem.
Why Children Masturbate
*Pleasure. Children learn very quickly that it feels good to masturbate.
*Self-soothing. For many children, masturbation reduces tension. These children may masturbate when they are upset, tired, bored, or feeling stress.
*Exploration. Many children will masturbate as part of the natural curiosity they have about their bodies.
What Parents Can Do
*Ignore it. Masturbation is, after all, a normal behavior for most children. Parents can best handle it by treating it matter-of-factly. Parents shouldn't try to get their children to stop masturbating by punishing, threatening or scolding. If they do, they run the risk of giving their children the idea that their genitals are bad and/or dirty.
*Remain calm. Parents should try not to overreact. They should also keep in mind that no physical harm will come to their children as a result of masturbation. If parents overreact, they may put fear into their children about their bodies.
*Don't be surprised. Masturbation among young children is very common, and quite normal.
When Children Masturbate in Public Places
Masturbation is something that should be done in private. Most young children, however, don't know the difference between public and private behaviors. In these cases, children must be taught. Parents should treat public masturbation as they would any other behavior that is not acceptable in public places, for example, nose picking. Here are some specific things that can be done to minimize masturbation in public places.
*Explain. If parents discover their children masturbating in a public place, they should tell their children that is something that should be done only in private, for example, in the children's bedroom or the bathroom. Parents should use words like, "It's all right to do that in the bathroom or the bedroom, but not in the grocery store or when other people are around." Parents should try not to criticize, nag, or punish their children. They should treat the behavior matter-of-factly.
*Offer alternatives. Parents should provide their children with something else to do with their hands while they are in public. They could also try to distract their children from masturbating by suggesting some other activity.
*Be consistent. If children, for example, masturbate while they are at day care, parents should work out a solution with their children's day care provider. It is important that the behavior be treated in the same way by parents and by other care providers.
When to Seek Help
On rare occasions, children's masturbation habits may be an indicator of other problems. Parents should consult their children's health care provider if:
*Children's masturbation interferes with their social interactions.
*Techniques to eliminate public masturbation have failed.
*Parents have any concerns about their children's well being.
*Parents feel that their children are possibly not masturbating, but scratching or rubbing the genital area because of discomfort. It may be possible that such children have an infection or a rash.
*Masturbation is constant.
Parents should keep in mind that in most cases, masturbation is a common, normal behavior in children. Very rarely is it an indicator of some other problem.
2006-12-10 21:47:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can mention it to her mom, but she probably already knows. Kids discover their bodies as soon as they are out of diapers, and often very young children masturbate. Let her mom handle it, and don't make the little girl feel like she is doing something wrong. You don't want to make her feel weird about her body or sex in general. It's a delicate issue.
2006-12-10 21:37:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's natural for children to start exploring there bodies, but that is a tad young. I would worry what she is being exposed to and by whom. I would try watching her a little more closely. Do a google search on children being sexual abused and look for the signs, see if any match her behavior. Although this could be simply her exploring her body its just always best to know what your looking for..
2006-12-10 21:36:27 · answer #8 · answered by Issym 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you see her putting her finger or hand in her pants?
And shes too young to be doing stuff like that shes an inocent little 8 year old girl ;o maybe she grunts because of the shows she dont like..?
2006-12-10 21:34:40 · answer #9 · answered by sonya3091 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
This is a normal part of life...let her go. She will stop. Telling her mom would just embarass her. This is the normal age for exploring ones body. Just pretend you don't notice, she'll stop.
2006-12-10 21:36:34 · answer #10 · answered by deb 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to her mom to see if she does this at home cause she may have mental problems her mom doesnt know about.Ask a doctor why she may be doing that.
2006-12-10 21:36:05 · answer #11 · answered by Miss.Strawberry 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋