I have been best friends with someone since we were in high school (15 years). He married his long-time girlfriend who is absolutely awesome. I'm so happy for him, but i can't help finding myself thinking how sexy she is or how great of a body or what an interesting mind she has. I have never acted upon any of this other than tell him he's one lucky guy. I feel ashamed for being so attracted to her, but I don't know if i even should. I would be ok if he was attracted to my wife, as long as he respected boundaries.
2006-12-10 11:35:53 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I don't think there is anything wrong with admiring your friend's wife, and being attracted to her. At some point you might even have a little crush on her or a huge crush on her. Or you may even think about her all the time and wish she was yours. And you fantasize that she is your there instead of your hand or the girl that you are having sex with. I don't think you should feel bad about this. You can't help how you feel. I've been there myself in the past. I had a friend that was with a guy that I really had a thing for. Now I'm happily married and don't even think about that guy anymore. I think you have the right idea, don't act on it and it will be OK. Just keep it all in your mind. I wouldn't mention it to the friend either unless it's to say what you have already said. Which is your a lucky guy.You might realize someday that she isn't as perfect as you think she is. People always want what they can't have.
2006-12-11 04:38:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well actually many people go through this they just dont act on it. I think that just because u believe you are attracted to her that u feel ashamed which you shouldnt. Many people feel this way but u have to learn how to control this feeling. I think that being a good friend has many obstacles in the way and this happens to be one of them...what you should do is stay mellow and cool and find yourself a woman who you can relate to and who can make you forget all about your friends wife
2006-12-10 11:42:04 · answer #2 · answered by smartdancer07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with being attracted to someone as long as you respect the marriage and don't act on it. Maybe if your mind was on someone else you wouldn't be so drawn to her. recognize what the boundaries are.
2006-12-10 11:40:52 · answer #3 · answered by True 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its ok to like her (per say) as long as you don't go to far with it. Also, maybe you liek her because you haven't realized what good of a wife you have. Take a moment and fall in love again with your wife! Take her out on a romantic date and you will forget about the other woman.
HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!
2006-12-10 11:43:11 · answer #4 · answered by zoiy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own dilemma. As long as the boundaries are respected. You can't control who your attracted to, but you can control your actions.
2006-12-10 11:49:38 · answer #5 · answered by Buttons 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Facts are facts. We are after all simply animals! It is basic instinct. Just respect the boundaries. Don't be ashamed.
2006-12-10 11:44:24 · answer #6 · answered by Jen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its cool just dont act on anything, your a human being. He probably thinks the same about your wife. It just something we keep to ourselves.
2006-12-10 11:50:36 · answer #7 · answered by okinaps319 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don’t take a chance on losing your best friend. Could it be you are having these thoughts because you’re not sexually satisfied at home?
2006-12-10 12:19:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its fine all men are a like but dont dare to try anything.. for you own sake you can loose a good friend..
2006-12-10 11:41:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋