No sex before marriage (but what if)............?

Question

...you followed that belief. I used to think like that now I think with my heart and feelings not solid ideologies

my question really is has anyone followed the belief of no sex before marriage and are you still with the same guy/gal and are thinks fine (i.e. no cheating etc) or have things gone wrong and how have you reacted to this....

reason I ask is I know this girl who believes in this "nosex before marriage" and I respect people for it but she personally is naive in love and easily hurt

so I want to know has anyone been hurt or are is it all still ok between you and your partner and has the Idea of "No sex before marriage" been a blessing or has it screwed up your beliefs because you are now sadly apart from one and another and now you are not sure if following that belief was the right thing to do or not? If the case is the latter what have you done to alter your thinking?

Answer 1

I know I'm not answering your question but, personally I think that waiting until marriage is good for their beliefs. I think that people who have waited may have some bad experiences. Not saying all of them, but It will hurt a lot worse when the person you lost your virginity cheats on you or divorces you. This is the first person you have been really passionate and intimate with, and that to me seems like a deeper loss than other failed marriages. But still I know both are terrible to those who still love their ex. I don't plan on waiting until marriage, but I will wait until I find someone I love.

Answer 2

I don't agree with it. You need to be physically compatable as well as emotionally. What if you got married then found out one of you could not satisfy the other? I'm not advocating jumping into bed with everyone you date, far from it, but if you're in a long term relationship with someone and you both love each other then theres no harm in sharing something special with them. Just because you're not married doesn't make you wicked or impure. The key thing is love. If a person has any respect for themself they wouldn't go around sleeping with everyone they dated anyway. You can love someone without being married to them. If you love them and they love you then theres nothing wrong with sex before marriage. What bothers me is the scare tactics used by some people and the blatant mis-information provided re: contraception, std's etc. To mis-inform young adults about this kind of thing is more irresponsible than having a SAFE one-night stand.. Telling young people condoms and birth control pills don't work as well as they really do, or to inform them that sleeping with someone outside marriage means you'll get an STD's is completely and utterly wrong. ALL young adults should be given the REAL facts and allowed to make their own minds up not frigtened and brainwashed into becoming robots. God gave us sex to enjoy between to people who love and care for each other regardless of whether they are married or not.

Answer 3

I will tell you that I am a 35 year old male who is still a stinkin virgin due to many stinkin reasons, but not due to the stinkin sex after marriage rule crap. I a firm believer if you love someone and they feel they same way and want to have sex then should be allowed because they love each other. Marriage is just a piece of paper that cost money even divorce stuff too. Your only young once and can not go back. So enjoy much life as you can while you are young.

Answer 4

Sex or not before marriage is a HUGE decision. I can speak from my own experience-- I waited- and I was 39 before I found the right one. I was engaged several times before that and almost gave in to temptation several times but something inside me always held me back- and I am glad. To some people sex is just a mechanical thing- to me its a deep intamacy- a sharing of the soul-- and there are some people I do not want to share that much with (a big indication that those early relationships were not the right ones for me....). Also for me, it was a faith linked decision- as I am sure it is for many people. I have good friends who did not wait and have lived with some regret over that decision as well as some friends that it really did not see m to affect that deeply- just think carefully and search your heart. Godspeed.

Answer 5

My husband and I were both virgins when we got married, and though our sex life got off to an awkward start, we are still together, faithful, and doing well after four years. As a Christian, I definitely think waiting is the right thing. I know a few couples who even chose not to kiss until their weddings, and it just made the wedding that much more meaningful and special.

Answer 6

I was one of those girls that thought that virginity was important.... Unfortunately one day someone popped my cherry!! That was the end of it!! I realised that I was more than just "virginity" and that whatever I did before my marriage was my life!! If I did it was because I wanted to do it!! However, my mum has always believed that virginity is very important and that God does not like sex before we are married... But to be honest, I think is just manipulation from the society, religion groups and closed societies!!

Everyone is free to chose whatever they want to do!! Plus no one should judge anyone!!

Answer 7

I've got a religious friend who believed in no sex before marriage and got married to her fella after only being with him for about 7 months. We were all a bit dubious, but she's still with him, five years on and they've got a kid and seem happy enough. Each to their own, I guess.

Answer 8

If your belief of "no sex before marriage" is important to you than stick to it. Personaly, I wouldn't buy a car without testing it and wouldn't get into such an important commitment without knowing whether or not we are compatible!

Answer 9

Would you buy a car without test driving it? Of course not. So why would you want to get married before having sex? It's just silly. People get married just so they can HAVE sex without the guilt. That's beyond retarded and cheapens the vows. If you want to have sex, then do it.

Answer 10

I honestly do not know anyone who has upheld that tradition, if they say that they have waited until their wedding night, they either have a Will Of Iron or they are telling porkies