we all know the typical setup of the household in india but i ask what is so wrong with the man cooking sometimes of helping his wife with the dishes women work outside just like men plus inside the home...dont u think men should do the same if they claim to be so great...doesnt that make women better if they do more work?
i hope i dont get any nasty vulgar remarks from u nasty male chauvanists out there
in practice men and women arent equals in marriage
i want to what ppl think on whether they should be or shouldnt be plz give real reasons not "bc men are better or women need to be told what to do"!
2006-12-10 10:55:13 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Hi Dear...
Really a good question yaar!!! Well... did u know... this is the question that reflects your personality...??? I completely agree with - that women and men should equals in marriage... But you will rarely find this case in the country like India... I have never seen the positive attitude of a men towards women...But the true relationship of marriage is that - a men should comprehend his wife completely... if they behave as a friend with each other, believe me... their relation will last longer... most of the men do have self-esteem in a bit higher level... why should i do the kitchen work if my wife is there with me????? but this attitude will really spoil our future of India... The same thing would be carried out to their children even(Heredity)... And about the woman she will just quietly do her work without uttering a single word from her mouth according to her husband's wish...
This is the reason why there are more divorce cases in India today... If the men and women understands each other, remains gracious with each other & always try to configure each others problem, then and only then, they will be called a perfect match for each other, not by look, but by heart....
Sur
2006-12-10 18:36:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
equality is very difficult to define, let alone achieve. But it should be an ideal, despite the fact that it's a diffcult to actualize it in reality.
Males and females are often better suited to different tasks, and some division of labor along the lines we are sexually predisposed toward is sensible. Men are stronger and more mechanically minded, so it only makes sense that they are the ones that put new brakes on the car. Women are more intuitive and yeah, often more patient, so it often makes sense for her to be the one that sits up all night when the kid has an earache so her husband can get some sleep and go to work the next day. Depends on the household.
The problems often comes when the people involved, often paying way to much attention to what books, the media, and quick buck artists have to say about the value and fullfillment potential of the respective duties, are convinced they are getting the short end of the stick.
Fact is, people would be a lot happier if they made their own deals, followed their own hearts, and reached their own equilibrium.
People that really want it to work out and have their heads in the right places will naturally tend to find the right center. Once they start to (often because they feel compelled by skewed representation of same by the aforementioned media) start assigning weight and levels of importance to the various aspects of the partnership they control, and in so doing find a real or merely percieved bias and lack of "equality," they can create a lot of turmoil and dissatisfaction that wouldn't be there if they were listening to themselves.
I've only been to India once, but I know it is heavy on cultural bias in this area. Best you can do is find the sort of man I alluded to previously. One that loves you and doesn't pay much attention to what he's told to do or think. A spouse that does (male or female) is going to be troublesome no matter what country you are in.
2006-12-11 08:39:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
the best answer I can give you is this: if the woman is a stay at home wife, and the man is always out of the house working to keep food on the table, then it wouldn't hurt the woman at all to do the house cleaning. I'm not saying the man shouldn't help do some of the work, but he works 40 hours a week, give or take, and he shouldn't have to come home and do the house work as well. But the same goes if the roles of switched. If the woman works all the time and the man stays home, than the man needs to be doing the house work so the woman can come home from a hard days work and not have to worry about doing dishes or picking up the house. Now if they both work, then the chores should be divided up. Like my parents...both of them work, so my mother cooks dinner, and my dad does dishes...mom picks up the house, and dad does laundry. I believe that things should be done by both and not just one person in the household. It helps out both of them so neither of them are doing everything.
2006-12-10 19:11:43 · answer #3 · answered by angelchild688 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Men and women have different strengths and weaknesses. Each should, logically, fulfill whichever role makes the best use of their strengths and weaknesses in the best way. It so happens that men generally make the best leaders...so it follows they should lead their families. This has nothing to do with one being better than the other. Both are of equal value in a marriage...but this does NOT mean equivalent. An apple is not an orange...and the orange will always make a better orange than the apple will no matter how hard the apple tries. In other words, whatever feminists tell you that is in contradiction of these facts is a lie. Apples will be happiest trying to be the best apple they can...the oranges likewise.
Amen Alexandra...and you're spot-on about the giving 100% thing for each, debbie k.
2006-12-10 20:27:03 · answer #4 · answered by fishman 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Men and women in a marriage are equal, but someone has to be the head of the household--and that role has been assigned to the husband/father.
The Bible commands men to LOVE their wives. When the Bible says that wives are to submit to their own husbands, it does NOT mean that she is his slave! The husband nurtures the wife, the wife gives him support, everyone wins. There's harmony.
Men's and women's roles are complementary roles. The husband works and earns money for the family, the wife takes care of the house and children, and the husband can help with a few of the chores.
Unfortunately you have the Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan disciples who claim that the housewife is a leech, and that's not true at all. Keeping a house is an honorable job--so what if it doesn't bring a paycheck? Is someone's worth based on how much money they make?
Stop listening to the man-haters.
2006-12-10 19:23:16 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Marriage is a partnership, but it is an individual partnership meaning there are no set rules. Each couple has the opportunity to come up with their own division of labor hopefully recognizing there will be times when that division will not be equal. But it should all come out in the wash
To me the name of the game is compromise and each giving extra when your partner needs it. It doesn't matter who does the dishes as long as neither person feels that they are unfairly being asked to do them all of the time.
So yes, I believe in equality - but I don't think that is the way most marriages look on any given day - you have to look at the whole relationship.
2006-12-10 19:09:14 · answer #6 · answered by BettyBoop 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with angelchild where division of household labour is concerned. It would depend if the wife was also pooling in to the family income. But even if the man is the sole bread earner & the woman cheerfully does all the house work, the man & woman should have equal partnership in all spheres of their life i.e. she should be consulted in all important areas of decision making ....financial , bringing up of their children etc. She should not be less powerful because she is economically dependent. I vote for equality of all living creatures on this planet !
2006-12-11 06:21:15 · answer #7 · answered by Praxis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I look at this in 2 different ways. I believe that if both are working then the house work should be split or at least the man should help her keep up if she gets behind. After all it is hard for a woman to work, take care of the children and take care of the house if that is the case. On the other hand, if a woman is staying at home, I feel if that is all she does, that it is her role in the marriage to take care of things in the home while he is working. We both work and he has no problem cooking or cleaning. If I weren't working though, in my opinion, it is my responsibility to take care of the home.The bible says that when we marry, we become one which makes us equal. I think whatever works for both of you is the best.
2006-12-10 20:07:17 · answer #8 · answered by Angela F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice subject
look I believe that amarriage is acompany ..
so each party his own roles that is made for him
so being equal will not solve it and will not make it agreat companianship ... the man is the leader and the woman is the organizer ... but it is still apartner ship it will not harm each one of them to help the other ... so washing dishes sometimes can tighten up the relations ship in between so as the man will show his wife the he does appreciate her and what she does for him and for the family ... and i do totally support the working mom
and i belive that should not be done so as to get money
may be it is agood reason too but the main thing i belive so as u know that the person personality develops with work and it will make her understand the life better and she learns how to depend on her self so as if anyone of the family needed help inculding her husband she will be there for them ... but if she does that she has to do all her role as being amom and awife ...
so alittle sharing is pretty good and make the life even much better for both of them and for the kids' life and future...
2006-12-10 19:06:35 · answer #9 · answered by doctora didi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it should be equal, but not all women do there part either. I know many women who sit on there butts all day and watch soaps and shop all day while the man is out working. my husband and I help each other do the work and the house hold chores, we have been married for 16 years and we enjoy helping each other. a marriage is not 50-50 its both giving 100%
2006-12-10 19:07:19 · answer #10 · answered by debbie k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋