i need help?

Question

me and my exboyfriend receltly made love, however, i found out he was using me and now i found out im pregant, my family will disown me if i tell them, i know that people want kids, but this child cant be born, my ex is horrible and im scared he/she will turn out like him. I dont want to get rid of the child cos i dont want it, its because i will be disowned and although thats selfish, i cant loose my family, so how can i go about getting one please dont send me abuse cos i read some of theanswers for a girl who wants one and its full of abuse, i dont want to hurt the baby but i wouldnt be able to give it up f i had it and i wouldnt be to give it a home if i did,

btw im 19, and im debt cos my exbf spent it on the fruit machine :(

Answer 1

if your family disown you they'll still be there and as time goes by they might be able to come round. it sounds like you don't want to give up the baby and if that's what you want then go for it. don't let your family influence that. besides if they really love you they should be supportive and helpful. there are help around and you need to speak to your GP. as for your boyfriend if he's really nasty then please don't let him come anywhere near you and your baby. if you do decide to have the baby she will be your pride and joy and your who will love you no matter what and vice versa. there are hundreds on young independent young mothers out there and you could be a role model. there's nothing worst than regret so make sure you do want you want and the rest will fall into place. my sister got pregnant at a young age and and mum was very supportive. didn't have a go and now she has a flat with her baby and she's now thinking of going to uni to try and improve her life. there are help around and you won't be on ur own. good luck

Answer 2

First of all I believe a woman has the right to do whatever she wants with her body, if that means abortion then so be it. However if being disowned by your family is the main reason why you don't want to bring this child into the world then please rethink it. I know you mentioned that your ex is a horrible person and you don't want the child to grow up that way, but think about it...... would it? Ultimately it's your decision just don't make it based upon other people. In your life you must do what is right for you. And one more thing, not to be mean but if the guy was using you,you can pretty much rest assure that you guys weren't msking love. Anyhow I wish you the best.

Answer 3

The sooner you go to your GP or Family Planning Clinic the better you will start to feel. Just talking about it will help lift the burden and you'll be make a clear decision- I know at the moment it's scary, but don't make the decision to have an abortion based on how frightened you feel right now. If you do go ahead and have an abortion the quicker you do it, the less complicated a procedure it is. Above all, don't listen to anybody who might try and make you feel bad or guilty and bully you into an incorrect decision. Your body, YOUR choice. Take care.

Answer 4

Aw honey, thats a hard situation to be in. Do go to your doctor or phone a helpline like marie stopes clinics for advice. You need to talk it through a little more and really decide what you want.
You can choose to put it all behind you and get rid of the baby, which will be hard but you will learn from it and get on with your life. OR you can choose to keep the baby and deal with the consequences it brings, which, in the long run will sort themselves out. Many parents have 'disowned' their pregnant daughters only to be reconciled with them and the baby and utterly fall in love with it. I wish you the best of luck in your decision. Please get some professional help.

Answer 5

please seek counseling from a professional b4 u make any decisions. to rid urself of this will leave a lasting impression on u but to keep the baby without being able to support urself will also be devastating and unfair to the baby. first, u need to complete ur education. learn from ur mistake and move on. there are professionals available, willing, and able to help talk u through ur options. call an OBGYN for resources. write down a list of pros and cons of keeping the baby. i know u want to do what's right and that is hard for u to see right now. by the way, ur family will not disown u. everyone says it to scare young girls away from sex. ur family or someone in ur family will love u unconditionally because we all make mistakes. Pray to God for direction. He will help guide you through this. God loves us unconditionally. He created you and knows all about you. He is a forgiving God. He can turn this all around for you. Whatever you decide, please know the decision will not be an easy one but time has a way of healing and all things happen for a reason. I will be praying for you...

Answer 6

Sadly, after the man makes love with a woman, she has the consequences. You are now having to live with yours. Don't let anyone tell you what to do; if you are old enough to be pg. you are old enough to make a decision that can affect your whole life. I don't know if you have a pregnancy center in your town, but if you do, run to them, and get professional advice. There are options to pregnancy, some nice, some not so nice, but only you can make the decision. And only after hearing all of the facts, not just opinions from any of us who feel strongly one way or another. It is your body, treat it with love from now on, and choose wisely who you are with. Making out doesn't mean he loved you, only that he was horny. Be good to yourself, and make a decision that is for you and your future, with or without a baby. If you do give up the baby, or abort, learn from this experience. And teach all of your friends the same.

Answer 7

Try to talk to your family about this. You may be surprised how supportive families can be when someone they love needs their help. If you dont feel you can talk to parents, what about grandparents, aunt, or close friend?
Also talk to your doctor - he/she is in the best position to give you the advice you need. Everything you tell your doctor is strictly confidential so he won't tell your family, but he/she will be able to point you in the right direction for help and support.
Don't rush into anything until you find out all your options, only then will you be able to make the right decision for you.

Answer 8

hey sara. wow, that's real scary. well, no offense or nothing but your boyfrineds a jerk. Well i have two ways you can get through this actuallly threee but the third one's WRONG
1. talk to your boyfriend and tell him that u're pregnant, c wat he says
2. u haveto give birth unless u want an abortion which is not right bcuz how can u just kill a helpless child that was only born bcuz of ur lack of responsility and so talk to ur parents. mayb they will disown u but they can't b so cruel that they'll leave u n ur baby to die? rite?
3. abortion but gurl, u n i both no that that's just SO wrong.
well good luck, n I hope that u figure something out that won't hurt or KILL anyone, living or in ur womb!

Answer 9

Get yourself to either your GP's rooms, or a clinic! There you will be able to talk to people that will have your interests at heart. They will explain ALL the options open to you and respect your decision! You seem to be making a level headed decission here, but please make sure you are 100% happy with your choices. Families often say things , but when it comes to the crunch are you so sure they won't accept you and a baby? Go with your head, but please remember your heart. A man who has used you must be history .... don't repeat this mistake!

Answer 10

You need to sit down and talk to your parents. Trust me they are going to be angry and yell - a lot. But they have and always will have your best interest at heart. Then you need to go to the clinic and see what your options are - a lot will depend upon how far along you are. If you too far along, abortion is not longer an option so don't delay too long.

Good luck.