My parents treat my like garbage.?

Question

Im 16, and a well manored, well behaved and hardworking guy.

My problem is that my parents, more specifically my Mom and my Stepdad treat me like crap. I am treated like the worst child in the world, i have recently got into the best college in the country (UK) and always attend college/work hard. They are so strict, with stupid insignificant things, which mount up.

they have no issue with me getting drunk and staying out as late as i want (they go to bed without a care for where i am) which i guess is cool, but on the other hand they are completely anal about stupid things, such as waste. My stepdad has a good job (polic officer) with lots of money, however he still insists on routinely patrolling the house to ensure that i am not "wasting his money".

Examples of his rules:
No Tv when computer is switched on,
No Coat in the house,
The computer cannot be left on by the mains,
I cannot use the phone to call mobiles,

It seems stupid but it all adds up, making homelife terrible

Examples of things that he sees as waste:

using more than one appliance,
More than one spoonfull of sugar in hot drinks,
more than one type of sauce on a meal,
More than 3 slices of toast,
More than one item on a meal (eg chicken fillet)
Anything that he doesnt like the taste of
Having the light on before 6 pm
Having the heating on when he "isnt cold"


Can you imagine how it all adds up?

To add to this, my girlfriend of 18 months gets attacked about it through me, they feel that i choose her over them, which i do, i hate my parents and i much prefer the company of my girlfriend and her family, who treat me how i treat them, with the respect they deserve.

The effect of all this is that i begin to act out, I am a graffiti artist, i smoke weed and get drunk. They are choking me!

during the summer this year, my step dad and i fought physically which ended up on him telling me to leave.

The reason for one of these occassions was when i got spraypaint on the lawn, the tall grass (patchy grass due to building work). The punishment was that i had to pay him £20 to fix the lawn, i refused outright and took scissors out and cut it within 30 seconds it was sorted.

I cant take his abuse, hes not my dad, but my mom lets him treat me like crap.

Answer 1

Everyone has their own idiosyncrasies, you will have SOME when you grow into adulthood. I do understand what you are going through and I would go nuts if I had to live there.

Look on bright side, If you can live at a college dorm now, DO IT!!! or share a place with a buddy../ rent a room
Living at home can place a mental strain on anyone.....

You're 16, a few more years , you may have a job and have you're own pad to call home.. You won't have to think about them anymore.. See if you can call a hotline ,to talk with someone....or a friend, relative, teacher. get other opinions.. 8 /

As they always say: LOVE THEM FROM A DISTANCE...

Answer 2

Why smoke weed and drink to get back at them? You are only damaging yourself which you seem to already know. That is your most immature action, do you self a favor and drop that. You sound like you feel they don't love you, you should talk to your mum about it, I'm picking she is very proud of you and trusts you, parenting is not easy and neither is being your age and finding your feet. You will both make huge mistakes but try to understand where they are coming from, believe me it won't be long and you will be in their position. Try to do the best you can and be motivated to do what is best for you. You will reap the rewards.And believe me there are a lot worse parents than yours!!!!

Answer 3

My dear brother. I am 2 years older than you and I exactly have had and still do have these problems with my mother and my "stepdad".
Let me tell you my step that is the biggest douche-bag alive on this planet. My mom is sweet yet annoys the hell out of me. When I was 16, I worked my butt off to have enough money to enjoy my youth just like you and any other youngster. I stayed out late then, yet they were asleep. Just like how your steppfather sounds like, mine is also money hungry and greedy. Once I had a flat tire and he couldn't buy me new ones because his insurance would rise "bullshit". I see you like to drink. I likewise, infact I smoke weed alot too. But they are worse than hitler about it. Here in California, it is very strict to smoke cannabis, (Unlike lucky U.K) and so the fine is alot. My mom caught me smoking one time and she grew very pisst off. One time my steppdad stole my **** and called my dad in Iran and told him. Ever since I curse the bastard for doing that

Now, I have managed to survive? -Patience.
You need to be patient and learn to ignore them. Be in your own world when they are giving you crap. It is not hard to keep up with their bullshit. You also need know how to avoid drama. The key is, when they are around, you become who they want you to be. Show respect and be extremely polite. If they push you any harder say "I do not condemn your accusation" or "Your're disturbing my meditation" If you fight with words, in a diplomatic matter, you will make them buy everything you do and let you the f000k alone.

Trust me mate, I'm still wondering in the conflict, but it gets better everyday.

Answer 4

There's nothing anyone can do for you over the Internet. They might be able to offer some emotional support, but you're still going to have to deal with your militant parents. You're probably stuck in the situation you are in until you move out of the house and start your life.

Answer 5

I can put it more nicely but the I agree your best bet is to get a job or get a dorm room at college and move out.

Answer 6

You as a chum, theres not something plenty you're able to do to make her end. i might talk together with her. possibly tell her its incorrect. yet do not undertaking karma does exist and each thing she is doing to her mothers and fathers will come decrease back to her. In a fashion its the mothers and fathers fault to for not making her end and allowing her to handle them that way.

Answer 7

He needs to stop being such a control freak!
Happy people don't nitpick and make other peoples lives miserable, so have pity for the old man.....maybe one day he'll "get it" before he gives himself a heart attack.

Answer 8

all people has some types of issues when you have your children they will feel the same way about you
do the best that you can you cant please people all of the time but it sounds like you are a good kid. sounds like you are getting older and getting away to college helps also. on the other hand Be thankful they are not beating the **** out of you or drungs or drug addits.

Answer 9

Here's a thought: go to a school where you don't have to live at home, or else get a job and move out!! Good Luck!!

Answer 10

YOU ARE SO YOUNG TO BE SMOKING WEED AND DRINKING, BUT I GUESS THE LAWS ARE DIFFERENT, HEY THERE IS ONLY ONE MOTHER THE ONE WHO HAD YOU ANYONE CAN BE YOUR DAD SO YOU HAVE TO RESPECT HER, AND IF YOU THINK THE BEST IS TO LEAVE THEN GO AHEAD AND IF YOU LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND SO MUCH MARRY HER HAVE KIDS AND AND YOULL SEE WHY YOUR PARENTS ARE LIKE THAT ITS CALLED SACRIFICE