even tho i want to have sex with my boyfriend, i just cant seem to get turned on.
he has tried different methods of foreplay but it doesnt matter i just cant seem to do it.
i do want to but i just cant.
what can i do?
2006-12-10 04:08:31 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
just relax and dont force yourself to do it. it will only make it worse. when your ready you will feel it. try exploring the other sides of the relationship, like dinner out, cinema doing things you aint done before. it will soon come back
2006-12-10 04:12:20 · answer #1 · answered by Daniel_Son_Bonsai 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say how old you are but i is not unusual. The first thing you say is that you want it. This means that you are stressed out as you can't have it. So relax and try not to want it and do something else. If you are not married perhaps your body is saying hey! Hold on a minute.
Next maybe you are getting in a stew ebcause your boy friend expects you to want sex.
I have to say that sex is not the only thing to do with relationshops. in fact sex is a very small part. I have been married almost 40 years and have not wanted sex, it is not the only thing in life.
First stop worrying
Second relax
Third find something else to do, talk, share interests, play games even like monopoly or scrabble and learn to live with each other.
Fourth realise there is life beyond sex
Hope that helps
2006-12-10 12:56:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first and foremost thing is Do Not Stress Over It. Stress does not help the sex drive. You can try eating oysters, they are believed to be an aphrodisiac. Although this isn't proven, many sex therapist recommend them. You can also try playing out your fantasies. But, once again, don't stress out. If your gonna eat oysters don't expect to get in the mood, just go with the flow. Dress nicely, go to a nice restaurant, have a nice romantic dinner that include oysters and see where the night takes you. If it doesn't work that's fine, it will work next time. If you wanna try playing out your fantasy, make sure you are not having a stressful day, because that can ruin it and make you very tired. There's one more thing that helps me, watch porn together or alone, however you feel more comfortable.
I don't know how true this is, but in my personal experience, birth control lowered my sex drive by a lot.
Good Luck, hope this helped.
2006-12-10 12:27:41 · answer #3 · answered by juliakireyeva 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A loss of sex drive can have many reasons - emotional and physical ones. Many sex therapists recommend to stop "trying" and forcing yourself. You might need some time to let go of the pressure to function and to perform. Sometimes it really helps to communicate with your partner and consciously stop having sex for 2 or 3 weeks. Another thing that can give your sex drive a boost are Kegel exercises. These exercises increase the blood flow to your vagina. For some women a mild herbal aphrodisiac like Damiana can do wonders. Another thing you can do is to integrate non-sexual ways of pleasuring yourself into the relationship - sensual games or massages. But the most important thing is open communication. You are not a sex machine and you are entitled to feel sometimes not so sexy.
2006-12-10 16:53:17 · answer #4 · answered by Sinka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not being a pervert, I am speaking as someone who has had the same problem throughout the years.
My husband is a good lover and would do anything I asked to please me however, there are many times I simply find sex to be boring. I sincerely wish that I could be one of those girls that have multi-orgasms from intercourse and that the slightest thought of sex would turn me on...it just doesn't happen.
Could you be having some of the same feelings?
2006-12-10 13:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by sawftandtender 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try using sex toys to bust up some fun in ya relationship i get my fella to use a vibrator on me to pnestrate me and get me in the mood if you not got a vibrator then buy one you wont be dissapointed
2006-12-12 15:29:49 · answer #6 · answered by joanne v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try a course of yin yang huo. this is better known as horny goat weed. just put on search horny goat weed, for a list of suppliers. only one problem with it, your boyfriend will have a job keeping up to you. all the best
2006-12-10 12:24:42 · answer #7 · answered by briangimma 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Enjoy the peace.
2006-12-11 05:02:18 · answer #8 · answered by annebythegate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try watching so porn or some TV with whatever actor you think is cute... or try reading a steamy romance novel...
or just use some lube like KY or astroglide
2006-12-10 12:24:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you are just bored with this particular boy; your I want to is much weaker than your I don't want to.
2006-12-10 12:13:55 · answer #10 · answered by KnowALittleBit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋