My husband and I don't celebrate Christmas. He thinks its too commercial, and I think I shouldn't celebrate a "religious" holiday that I am not affiliated with. I don't celebrate Hanukkah just because, why Christmas? Anyway, our families are slightly annoyed that we aren't celebrating, but they have dealt with it. The question we keep getting is "But you are going to celebrate it once you have kids, right?" Do you think it is bad for a child not to celebrate a holiday when everyone around them is? I know that Christmas is becoming very secular, but even taking away the religious aspect, my husband would still not like the gross commercialization. Any thought? Thanks.
2006-12-09 17:15:50 · 13 answers · asked by NJ 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
Christmas, in and of itself, is not really a healthy thing for children. However if you don’t allow your children to celebrate it, then they will miss out on the social aspects of it. I grew up poor. My parents seldom bought anything for us. The other kids laughed at the worn out “hand-me-downs” that my brother and I got for Christmas gifts. Not scoring didn’t bother me, but the brutal words of the kids that got everything did a lot of harm.
I suggest you celebrate it with them, but minimize the commercialism, by limiting gifts to small, but practical things. You might also encourage them to help out needy people on the holidays. They might get a feel for what Christmas is supposed to be.
2006-12-11 19:37:48 · answer #1 · answered by Marvin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Christmas has secular Pagan roots. It has always been that way. The commercialism is something that is fairly new. But it is possible to have Christmas without the commercialism, but very few people are willing to try no matter how much they complain about it. Yes it is celebrated religiously by Christians but they do not hold the monopoly on it as it is equally secular if not moreso.
Yule is what Christmas was based off of and is the secular Pagan winter festival. Pagan encompasses anything that is not Judeo-Christian or Muslim. Also, it's non-commercial.
I was raised by people who were/are anti-holiday, period. The rare occasions that holidays were celebrated, they went out of their way to make everyone miserable. So I never had the happy times that everyone else did and I resented it very much. Plus kids are cruel and others will get jealous very easily. It takes an incredibly strong person not to get jealous and kids are not ready in any way to handle that kind of thing. Personally I think it's a bad idea to deprive your kids of something. Going back to the "kids are cruel" thing, he/she is going to be asked constantly by adults and peers alike what they want for Christmas, etc and they will get teased and tormented mercilessly by their peers and then wonder what it is they're missing out on. The secular aspect is so steeped in tradition that most people can't fathom anyone not celebrating. Then you will get questions on why you are depriving your child(ren) as it is considered a form of child abuse by many.
2006-12-10 02:46:48 · answer #2 · answered by Cinnamon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It think that in our capitalist culture Christmas and most holidays for that matter have been driven to be much too commercial than they were intended to be. But I think that the essence of Christmas is not just about buying gifts for the loved ones, but an occasion to celebrate the bonds with the people that u love.
I think it might be very difficult for ur husband to distance the kids from the idea of gift giving if u choose to celebrate it, but I think that once u put the emphasis on that togetherness and Love maybe u can stay away from both the religious and the commercial aspects. Make ur own traditions, instead of going to church on Christmas morning maybe u want to go help in a soup kitchen or something that involves ur values.
The alternative of no Christmas, Hanukka or kwanzaa at all would be very though for them endure. I wish u and ur future kids the best of luck. Happy Holidays!
2006-12-09 17:57:35 · answer #3 · answered by Leonjon 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
One of my sons did not start celebrating Christmas until he was 5 years old and we moved closer to grandma. There were no "effects" to him or the other "non-celebrating" kids around him. I also had a roommate in college (earthy type) who did not celebrate Christmas either - again no "effect." Her family did other things during the holiday season for pretty much the same thing. However, she did have fond memories of celebrating family and being together without the religious and commercial aspects. It is my belief that regardless one's choice (or not) - whether Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Winter Solstice - creating personal & family traditions is where the fun of the season comes in to play.
2006-12-10 02:19:04 · answer #4 · answered by Nuttie Nettie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
While I respect your beliefs and do understand your husbands views of Christmas being very commercialized, I cannot imagine a childhood without memories of Santa and Christmas. Christmas does not HAVE to be about gifts, but can be a time for celebrating family and being together. Instead of gifts, bake cookies and teach them about the joy of giving.
I could not imagine a child going to school and telling his/her friends that Santa does not come to their house. That could potentially ruin Santa/Christmas for many other children who learn "the truth" about Santa younger and younger it seems. Sant does not have to bring lavish gifts, but what about new coloring books or mittens?
My inlaws do not celebrate Christmas - they celebrate Winter Solstice. Their children and grandchildren still have Santa.
2006-12-09 17:34:42 · answer #5 · answered by Sarah 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Celebration of a holiday and buying into the multi-layered progranda, is one thing.
Observing the holiday by creating your own personal family tradition is another.
You could choose to take your family on a hike, bike ride, speacial trip at these times of the year. Your children will still learn the importance of family.
2006-12-09 17:31:14 · answer #6 · answered by CCpher 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I AM 28 AND NEVER CELEBRATED CHRISTMAS. NO HARM DONE. I FEEL YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING. EVEN IF IT WERE TRUE ABOUT JESUS IT IS WAY THAT PEOPLE CELEBRATE WITH GIFTS MORE THAN JESUS BIRTH ANYWAY. IT IS ALL ABOUT "WHAT AM I GETTING" THE ENTIRE POINT WAS LOST LONG TIME AGO. IF YOU LOOK AT THE FACTS JESUS WAS NOT EVEN BORN IN THE WINTER. BUT BESIDES THAT I KNOW PEOPLE THAT DON'T CELEBRATE IT BECAUSE OF THE SAME FEELINGS YOU HAVE. IT IS REALLY TO COMMERCIALIZED GOSH PEOPLE PAY 5XS WHAT THEY NORMALLY WOULD FOR A FREAKING PLAYSTATION.LOL
2006-12-09 17:33:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Get real. I'm an atheist and a secular liberal to the bone and that thought never crossed my mind. Nor should it. Children are not, and should not be, miniature walking billboards for the beliefs of the parents. If you have children, then let them be children. In America, that means allowing and joining with them in celebrating the largest national holiday we have.
My problem now is that I want to give my 1.5 year old grandson a WowWee Roboraptor Robotic Dinosaur for Christmas, but my daughter says that he is too young. She is so damned conservative sometimes.
2006-12-09 17:28:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Tough question I am a single mom with two kids my son is 11 and my daughter is 19 months. My son's meme told him a long time ago that there is no such thing as Santa and although that is true there is not real Santa there is still a spirit. Howver I will bring my daughter up believing in Santa. What ever your religion is the over all question is do you believe in Jesus? If there is a yes then bring your kids up right let them know that they are celebrating his life then it does not have to be too commercial. You do not have to go all out or over board just keep it real. If you do not believe in Juses then so what who cares what is going on around you. Kids deal with gay parents, different races in there familys, break ups and divorce i'm sure they can deal with not having Christmas.
2006-12-09 17:28:18 · answer #9 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Christmas as we know it has really nothing to do with Jesus. The early Jews did not celebrate it. It has proved to be a pagan celebration 'imported' into false Christianity. Jesus himself said nothing about his birthday. But DID ask us to remember his death. 1 Corinthians 11;24
Kids appreciate the real truth .
2006-12-09 17:25:18 · answer #10 · answered by pugjw9896 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋