Ex-husband always late for visitation. What should I do?

Question

The man has put his children last on his list for years and refused to put hours of pick up and drop off in our divorce decree so he could do as he pleases.
The youngest is still at home and get this: His dad wanted to pick him up at mdinite, then drive to his house another hour,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,He refused to make alternate plans for the boys sake so my son lost out on seeing his dad.
That's just the tip of the iceburg.
Visitation is every other weekend and my ex calls my son at the time he's due to arrive and tells him he's stuck in traffic. Says it could be hours.
So I suggested he leave work one hour early every other week to avoid rush hour. He refuses to do that and last night said he was in a six mile back-up that may not clear till midnite.......Naturally I had to cancel the weekend. and that makes me look real mean and my son gets hurt and angry at me.
I literally feel as tho my son deserves better from his self absorbed father. He is hurt that his dad isn't on time.

Answer 1

I feel so bad for your kids. I would talk to friend of the court or an attorney. But look at it this way. Time with your children is precious and he is just giving you all his precious time. Your children will remember this when they get older trust me. Think of how you relationship will be with your children vs his.

Answer 2

The only things you can do is tell your ex that if he doesn't make it there at a decent time then you are taking him back to court to set certain visitation times on him and the judge will do that for you, trust me, I know. And if your child support review is due then tell your ex you will ask them to review the child support to then while you are there, maybe you can get more money for your children.
My ex has to pick up my children at certain times every other weekend.
Once I told this to my ex when he would call at the exact time and say he was running late (and he did this at least once a month) he stopped.

Answer 3

Sounds like a real winner.
been their done that and still living it have 2 boys who's dad is not involved only comes when he won ts.
u just do what u have to to keep things good between u and ure son because when its done he is all that really matters any ways!

Answer 4

Mark every visit he is late for on a calender, and show it to the judge...

You might not think it will help, but it helped one of my friends out alot.

Be real though, your son really ISN'T hurt from him being late, that is just you being pissed off... I wouldn't bring that up to the judge, or it's liable to backfire in your face... The courts don't like settling crap like that, they want you to settle that like adults... Just show the court the facts on how many times he is late, play their game, don't complain about him, just let them know that it effects your schedual.

You are kind of lucky though, my girlfriend's baby's daddy hasn't even attempted to see his son in almost 8 months.... go check out one of my recent questions on child support debt...

Answer 5

Get a court order that the father has to be within an hour of the promise time or else he will have to wait for the next visit.

If he behave like that with his workplace, he weren't have a job.

Answer 6

arent you doing all you should. Who is missing out. You , your son or Dad. Unfortunately you parents still cant get along and your son pays the ultimate price.

Answer 7

your son deserves much better treatment from his father. Can you discuss this with your former husband or will he simply ignore you? I would discuss this with a lawyer if only to protect your son!

Answer 8

tell the judge

Answer 9

yep