this guy and I were dating and for a while and we were (still are) in love with each other. It was really nice and we both fell really happy. However, from previous relationships, I've been really scarred and am very mistrusting (extremely),and sometimes I doubted this boyfriend of mine, but always proven wrong! He has a lot of things on him (school, family, etc.) and they're all going bad right now, and I'm on the same boat, and that mistrust of mine added to his stress. We split up two weeks ago, and I asked him back, but he said he wanted me as a friend. He still calls me and I call him...and I know he still loves me as much as I do. However, I'm scared that he might never come back to me, and it sucks seing him as a friend everyday and saying "dude" and "man"...its irritating!! But I want him to be happy. I'm there for him because that to me is true love (helping him out when he's having it bad)...but what if he never sees me as more than a friend anymore??? I dont know what to do
2006-12-09 14:32:36 · 7 answers · asked by David R 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I really would hope that you can learn to trust again. I have felt the same way you did, not being able to trust people after a deep relationship went wrong. I learned to trust again simply because i understand that everyone is not the same. You really shouldn't enter another relationship or continue to pursue this one until you get your trust issue straightened out. Love is the most beautiful thing in the world to have for someone else it is also the most dangerous. Without trust there is nothing, NOTHING! No way can you sit there and say that you have true love for him but you find it hard to trust him! Really straightened yourself out and then you can truly love!
2006-12-09 15:06:48 · answer #1 · answered by qdeezy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it's the sort of situation that requires time more than anything else. If he means that much to you, you should be careful not to leap to any conclusions before you have a clearer idea of where things are headed. He may need more space than you're willing or able to give right now, and that's certainly a hard thing to deal with. I think that you should be willing to wait a little while if he's that important to you, but if you come to see that nothing is going to change and it's still too hard to be with him simply as a friend, then you owe is to yourself to get out of the relationship.
2006-12-09 22:39:27 · answer #2 · answered by Dorian V. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've taken the biggest step - realizing the problems are your's and not his (with the trust). However you need to realize that not everyone is out to do you bad. Life will give you hard time, its what you do with those that shows what kind of a person you are.
2006-12-09 23:02:04 · answer #3 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know..if you don't take any chances you never get anywhere...My mother always told me "do what you're most afraid of"--she was right. You have to create your own happiness.
2006-12-09 23:16:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start by taking a breath now and then
2006-12-09 22:44:32 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi David,
Tell him how you feel!
If you want to keep him in your life be honest about your feelings and understanding of his. Work together.
So, tell him how you are feeling.
2006-12-09 22:55:11 · answer #6 · answered by Benjamin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my friend had the same problem she dacked him then sucked in PUBLIC they are back together again now though
2006-12-09 22:52:38 · answer #7 · answered by jimmy b 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋