Background: My mother has "issues"..She would make a scene if my wife attended. My sister is afraid that my mother would embarrase her.. Should I attend or not...without my wife,
2006-12-09 12:54:29 · 14 answers · asked by corporatetrade 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Honey, they stuck you right smack dab in the middle of a war zone. Mother needs to deal with her "issues". Your sister bless her heart should not have to worry about a scene at her wedding, but it should be Mother that she talks to. Your wife should be invited to the wedding, that would be only right, but if that's not possible then I would go for the cermoney, but leave after. I would not attend the reception without my wife.
How does your wife feel? My heart breaks for her, knowing she's the "problem". If she's ok with you attending the wedding, then all means go, then tell her to ready that you are taking her out for dinner and a night of dancing. That the cermoney is the most important thing that you want to share with your sister, but she's the most important person you want to share the "fun" with. That's what a reception is for, so share the vows being exchanged, and then that the woman you love in your arms and thank her for being yours!
God bless us all...........
2006-12-09 13:05:14 · answer #1 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apologize to your sister and send her a nice gift. You need to make a stand for your wife and not allow your mother and her issues to bully you. Your sister could make a stand and tell your mom that if she acts up then she will not be welcome at the wedding. If she isn't strong enough to do that then you should just stay with your wife. You are a package deal and if you keep allowing others to treat her like a second class citizen then they will feel justified in doing so. You will also be sending a subliminal message to your wife that she isn't important to you. Either take your wife and leave after the ceremony or don't go at all. Either way you must stick to your wife.
2006-12-09 13:37:32 · answer #2 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tensions between relatives can dampen the joy the wedding day, but with the right attitude and a positive approach, you can practically eliminate family friction. Try to reconcile mother and your wife at least for one day. Your sister should arrange sitting at ceremony and reception such a way to minimize the contact and you should be close to your wife. If your efforts do not work and the feud threatens to break up your immediate family, seek help from a professional family counselor. If nothing will improve situation, then you shouldn't attend without your wife.
2006-12-09 13:47:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you go to your sister's wedding, then you'll be in court next week going through divorce. Your wife is first and kids also if you have them. Your sister should not let your mother ruin her wedding. If your sister cares about you enough, she would stand up to your mother. Have her tell your mother that if she makes a scene she will be escorted out and never invited to anything again.
2006-12-09 21:27:10 · answer #4 · answered by Aliayh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your sister that you will not go to the wedding. If your wife and sister get along then you can all do something as a group when they get back from the honeymoon. A celebratory dinner, just the four of you might be nice.
2006-12-10 02:00:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
DO NOT GO! You have to stick by your wife- if you go, she will hold it against you forever and you're supposed to be married for the rest of your life...so that's going to be a very long grudge!
Don't lower yourself to their level...send a nice, semi-expensive, very thoughtful gift to your sister on her wedding day and sign the card from you AND your wife (and kids too if you have them). You'll get the point across that you still love your sister but you have to stand by your wife and the choices you made in your life.
2006-12-09 13:04:20 · answer #6 · answered by preciouspinkla 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your wife should come first and foremost.
If you do go to the wedding that is the same thing as saying to your wife " I don't care about you"
It is disgusting for your sister to put you in this situation.
Good luck
2006-12-09 12:58:56 · answer #7 · answered by Laurie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would stand by your spouse, she is your family now.
Send your love to your sister but tell her you cannot leave your wife behind, no matter what. That way you will send a clear message for any future special dates in the family, if they can't include the love of your life then they can't include you and your wife will love you for standing up for her.
Good luck!
2006-12-09 20:22:22 · answer #8 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the wedding with your wife, and if your Mom tries to cause problems then step up and defend your wife.
2006-12-09 13:19:22 · answer #9 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. Your family is with your wife now. Send a gift, but do NOT attend.
2006-12-09 14:26:45 · answer #10 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋