Forgive me mother for the mistakes I have made.
I suffered the consequences, the cost I have paid.
I am not perfect, nor do wish to be.
This is something you should know, I beg you to see.
The pressure you have placed on me is far too much to bear.
I can't keep living life for you, it just isn't fair.
I need time to breath, to think, time to make my way.
I will never be able to do this if I keep hearing what you say.
Your intensions are horribly bad and I cannot live this way.
I need to make my own mistakes and live them day by day.
This doesn't mean I do not care, for what you've done for me.
But I do not love you anymore, so please just set me free.
2006-12-09 12:30:24 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I'm really young, so no, I'm not a poet.
2006-12-09 12:34:12 · update #1
The poem is good. The story is sad.
2006-12-09 12:33:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The poem is good. However,if you are needing to say all of this to your Mother, then by all means just say it. There is no need to write it in a poem that she may not understand is meant total for her alone!! So if this is, what I am sure that it is, then honey, just try telling your Mother exactly how you feel, just like you wrote it but honestly and to her face. She will respond much better than you think to your words coming from your mouth and your heart rather than reading them from a piece of paper.
2006-12-09 12:37:51 · answer #2 · answered by Cindy Roo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparent it is that you've spent some time
delving into crafting your rhyme
Though a shame it is, and true it be
this poem it sounds the same to me
as millions of others and with schemes the same
what is this poem, the title, the name?
Your imagery is tried, tested, and true...
it's all been done, long before twas discovered by you
and though it is you've given your best shot,
please don't quite, maintain, apply your inner thought
another effort may not be so vain
try again, before the rain.
2006-12-09 12:38:50 · answer #3 · answered by somewherein72 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I like the first 2 paragraphs the most.. they kept a constant feeling and message while being general at the same time. I thought the 3rd one was more "to the point", like it rushed what the first two were saying.
Either way, it is quite nice.. very intriguing
2006-12-09 12:33:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
good and a little sad,but you should never stop loving your mother.
2006-12-09 12:47:15 · answer #5 · answered by ♥Mandy♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very long poem and very long sentences. All you mean is, imho, "forgive me mum but set me free". Nice line, it'd do.
2006-12-09 12:35:15 · answer #6 · answered by McAtterie 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sad
2006-12-09 12:31:27 · answer #7 · answered by Kelly Bundy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That was very good. I enjoyed it.
It was sad, though.
2006-12-09 12:36:28 · answer #8 · answered by ξℓ Çђαηφσ 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow...that's so sad, I love my mother, you should love yours too--but I'm not telling you what to do.
2006-12-09 12:34:19 · answer #9 · answered by ImAssyrian 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
that is nice. sounds like you want your mom to give you some space to be your own woman!! but, don't stop loving her!! remember, she gave you life ~~ but, she herself is a human too... who is fallible and fails sometimes!! try forgiveness!!
2006-12-09 12:32:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋