Going absolutely insane and feeling hopeless, need advice!!?

Question

I am a grad school student and on the side I do part time tutoring for low income kids. There is a girl in particular that is severely behind in school and I have been closely working with her to get her on track. I have gone above and beyond my role of tutor (which is free by the way). I have given her special attention, extra sessions, and more. I talked to her mom, stressing how crucial it is to read with her at home, and go over things I tell them to do, but each and everytime THEY DON'T! I find it so frustrating that she doesn't listen to me that I am ready to almost give up. What can I do? This little girl is alarmingly behind and I am more than willing to help, but the mom will not listen to me and each session she comes in with the work undone and lessons unlearned. Help!!!!

Answer 1

Obviously you've already talked to the parents and they seem apathetic. I would suggest two things:

First, talk to the student. In a really nice way, ask her WHY she isn't doing her work. Don't give her work that requires the help of her parents; give her things that she can do on her own. If she's not interested in the work, see if you can re-package it in a way that she will find interesting. For example, I had a student who hated to read until we discovered National Geographic Kids magazine. He just eats those up, but he would never touch a novel! At his age level that's okay, so I found lots of illustrated books about science and slowly started integrating them into our reading. Adapt the curriculum so you're still teaching the same SKILLS but using content and context that is relevant to her. If she's just being stubborn, talk to her seriously about the consequences of not learning. Not the "imposed" consequences (being grounded or losing TV privileges) but rather the intrinsic consequences, like being held back when her friends go to the next grade.

2. If you're allowed, talk to her teachers. Perhaps, instead of giving her additional work you could support and build on her classwork and homework. They could be your best allies here. A lot of time deeper learning is better than wider learning, which is why supplementing her regular schoolwork might be best.

Also, have you considered that perhaps her mom CAN'T help her read? A lot of adults are illiterate and manage to get by in society just the same. She could also have a vision problem that affects her ability to read the words on the page, and she might not be able to afford the necessary eye care. I know this has happened at my own school, and I understand that it puts the classroom teacher in a very awkward position but it has to be worked around.

Answer 2

The hardest part of any social working is learning not to get personally involved in a situation, in those situations one cannot take on anothers problems as thier own, it only leads to a downwars spiral which i would assume you are riding down on.

The best intentions alone cannot unfortunatly save anything, it takes as you have stated more than just yourself to help in the current situation.

I agree though that the student (no mention of age) does need help, but all one can do is to try to teach good study habits to her and emphisize how important this issue is (if shes old enough to comprehend your position)

The main thing you must rememebr is to keep a slight seperation in life or you will be feeling this a lot as you move on with your career.

Answer 3

definite. And workout and deep ideas and blah blah blah won't help. there's a reason you experience hopeless and its maximum possibly appropriate to melancholy. in case you have melancholy warning signs, like thinking why to get off the mattress interior the morning, drowsing too plenty or too little, urge for food and temper ameliorations, and so forth, hopelessness is possibly a type of. each physique feels hopeless one time or yet another of their existence . decide the reason. maximum possibly, anti depressants will help. i don't know how old you're, yet I promise you, youthful or old, each physique looks like this a minimum of once or twice of their existence. circulate to a therapist, tell them u r depressed and that they'll supply u suited meds. Take them for six months to a three hundred and sixty 5 days and that i promise this sense would be resolved. do not attempt to choose this all out on ur very own. you will regain wish, as quickly as whats bothering you deep interior is resolved, I promise. basically remember, you at the instant are not remoted in this probem. experience extra suitable quickly .

Answer 4

Sounds like you have done your best and more. But you must realize any pupil has to want to learn or at least have an interest before they can go forward and learn. know you probably have but have you tried different approaches? such as more visual than just words etc..
You do not need help just to realize you are doing all you can.

Answer 5

you have to speak to the girl´s mom and tell her that in order for her daughter to imrove she has to be involved also and do what you ask. Give her a period of time to see if this works, and if it doesn´t you should quit, because you are investing time and effort and it's for nothing.

Answer 6

I would sit down with this little girl and her mom and tell them how you feel and tell them if the little girl continues to act the way she does that you will discontinue your services to them. That may open their eyes and realize that they really need you.

Answer 7

You're doing your best, don't beat yourself up! Her parents seem to be a little less than helpful but there's no way you could claim "loco parentis" so do your best and try and get over it.