yesterday when my wife came home from work she was really in a bad mood i tried to cheer her up by saying nice things, but she didn't tell me what was wrong so i started kissing her neck and she pushed me off of her saying that all i was, was nothing but a dog and i only wanted sex from her. she stormed out the house and i asked her where she was going and she said no where. she didn't come back till 3 hours later when she came back there was a change in her mood because she was cheerfull and i asked her what cheered her up and she said noONE! anyways figuring she was in a good mood last night i tried to 'get it on' by rubbing her back and working my hands down on her because i wanted to try some new postitions with her that i knew she liked. but she fired off at me yelling at me which hurt me. and it isn't just sex she snaps at everything i do she use to love the things i do. i even tried new stuff just in case she was bored that didn't work. what should i do i don't want to lose her?
2006-12-09 09:11:25 · 13 answers · asked by jeff d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hire a private eye....where there is smoke, there is usually fire.
2006-12-09 09:18:21 · answer #1 · answered by Rudy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have lived there before, here is how you can tell without tracking her. Break your routine by arranging to leave your work early, catch her at home during times you are normally gone. If she comes home at irregular hours, brushes you away and heads straight for the shower, she has just returned from being with someone else. Also, keep an eye out for new or different hygiene products and/or contraceptives, also watch your charge card billing statements. Never sneak around or search places you shouldn't, do not lower yourself to that level. Actually the best thing to do is be on your own best behavior. From what you have disclosed, I would have to say there are probably things you have not shared about your side of the "cold war," when this happened to me, my wife was tired of dealing with me in my addiction. If she is cheating, it is too late, she is gone. Hold no quarter for her, because years later, even with a new-found fidelity, the betrayal of trust, as an issue will still be there. I hope the best for you -God Bless...
2006-12-09 18:53:14 · answer #2 · answered by Road 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When she arrives from somewhere, record the mileage. If she takes off on you again ask her where she went (including all the stops if there was more than one) and record the mileage.Reset your odometer and go for a ride tracing everywhere she went and back. Take her with you so she can tell you the roads she took. Look at your checking account/credit card statements, cell phone/home phone bills and compare to the dates and times of these "escapades." Resaerch the tel numbers dialed. Are they relatives or friends that you know? Catagorize them under two parts: Those you don't know, those who you do know but may be the "other" guy. remember with numbers dialed, if it was dialed she wasn't with them at the time. This applies to girlfiends, family members,etc. this one got my wife bad.When it comes to the moment of truth, I recommend that you purchase a digital voice recorder because she'll probably want to make some calls to "prove" to you the "truth". When you purchase this equipment, try it on before you do any official recording to make sure there is no feedback. Also research what the laws are on recording telephone conversations in your state. Also consider installing a spy (eblaster) in your computer. Most will send all the info to your e-mail (create a secret one just to document your facts). It will record passwords,IM Chat,web sites visited,e-mail conversations,etc.Most importantly you have to be patient. Don't let emotions get the best of you because it can distract you from being an effective investigator thus ineffective or insufficient results.There are also companies that provide polygraph exams. they vary from 300-800 depending where you want the exam taken. this a good tool to use in answering what didn't get answered. It's not 100%, but it up there.I unfortunately discovered the truth about my spouse. She was a damn good liar, but I was too sharp for her cheating and lying ***!Good luck!
2006-12-09 17:45:27 · answer #3 · answered by vince 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to plan a road trip! Get away for the weekend by planning a trip to the mountains or some place you guys haven't been. Maybe a concert or something. Take it from a guy who has been married for 14 years. Don't Jump To Conclusions! It's not worth it. You can't let her actions towards you control you! When it gets nasty, just take a walk and be the bigger person.
Also you might want to try to get her some flowers every month....works for me....no certain day either. WalMart has roses for around $8 - $12.
2006-12-09 17:26:23 · answer #4 · answered by John H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though she is trying to rationalize justification for a guilty concience. Be nothing but nice. Kill her with kindness, but keep your wits about you. Cards, flowers, and little notes for no reason work very well, and it's best to not be around when she gets them so she can't accuse you of having an ulterior motive. Maintain your suspicions. She's obviously guilty of something. The better you treat her, the more difficult it will be for her to live with what she's done. When she finally breaks, the healing can begin.
2006-12-09 17:28:57 · answer #5 · answered by rtanys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's cheating on you. Until you and her sit down with someone who knows and deals a marriage counselor for instance with your situation you may end up losing her. Try going yourself first and later on if you can take her. A lot of marital problems can be solved if action is taken right away.
No matter the outcome give it a try, see in this way you can sort things out.
Good luck.
2006-12-09 17:26:23 · answer #6 · answered by Laela (Layla) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
plan a romantic surprise that DOESNT involve a trip to the bedroom....while your out maybe you can initiate a convo to find out whats really wrong. and if she wants to talk, just listen. but u know more than anybody up here whats going on in your marriage so if there are signs that she is cheating OTHER than what u put up here, you should pay close attention.
2006-12-09 17:20:23 · answer #7 · answered by jean grey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No sex = Dump her
You need to gather some evidence to see if she is indeed cheating and then be prepared to dump her. There are too many women on this planet to put up with that type of behavior.
2006-12-09 17:55:33 · answer #8 · answered by B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you know that she is cheating ? May be it is your fault. May be she is feeling that you just use her for sex.
Did you have a romantic dinner with her anywhere in the past month or in the past year? Did you take her anywhere?
Do these things and ask her if there is anything bothering her.
2006-12-09 18:18:32 · answer #9 · answered by kenneth h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her to stop jumping down your throat for no reason. Yes, I would suspect something. She's hiding something.
2006-12-09 17:20:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
be upfront and ask her if there is someone else and see her reaction if there is then you don't need her anyways just sit down with her and talk calmly
2006-12-09 17:20:08 · answer #11 · answered by traci c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋