my husband lied to me!?

Question

i feel so sad today! i caught my husband in a lie! he said he was broke and i am spending my last little bit for bread an ciggs. today. he left his wallet in the bedroom while he showered and i did peek. he has money an telling me lies about it! i know i shouldn't have looked. but now that i did , i am so hurt! what should i do? just go an spend my last little bit or confront his a!ss?

Answer 1

If the money is intended for something important, then he's broke. He just hasn't paid the bill yet.

Oh, you are SO going to feel like crap if he's holding the money for your Christmas present. He will rip you and you will deserve it for being a snoop and convicting him.

Tell us how this turns out, methinks that he's smarter than to lie and leave the money in his wallet. Bet you 5 bucks you're overreacting.

Answer 2

Your husband might have lied to you which was wrong but just dont jump to any conclusions he may have a very good reason this you best find out by asking him although then he will think you are spying on him as christmas is so near he might be using the money for a present or something which he want to keep secret at this time .I know it is very hard when you are spending your last money but in this case I would give him a chance ask him once more if he has any money as you need it for food or milk he might then tell you the truth .

Answer 3

Just my opinion...Husbands and wives should have their own money, and not have to account for it to each other. of course the bills should be paid and shared if thats the agreement. But each should have his own money to spend as he chooses. Mabe you spend faster or more that he does. Mabe he doesnt want to tell you he has money, cause you will ask for it. For men money is power, they need an unknown stash. If you are budgeting your money, you will always have enough. Talking about money is a sore subject in most marriages. If you truly need something, I am sure your husband will help you out. Try not to snoop, it only causes trouble. If you need something ask for it. Your husband has a right to have money in his wallet and so do you. Don't place too much importance on the LIE, it just shows he does not feel comfortable telling you he has a buck. think about why that might be. Is he other wise generous? Are the bills paid? do you share time out together? what else is going on? Lots to think about. Good Luck

Answer 4

well the money he has in his wallet could be for emergency use you never know I'm sorry you are so broke i guess a lot of people are going though rough times i just didn't realize how hard some people have it.i always save money and have a budget that i go bye so i never broke and i dont use credit card.this is so funny i walk into a store not to long a go and saw this man pay with a c.c
and brought a box of pop cycle i could believe it the interest on cc
and he buy a box of pop cycle lol.I'm sorry your husband lie to you any relationship when a man love a women and a women love a man they shouldn't lie to each other that mean they could lie about other thing in there life and that could lead in to more trouble in there relationship

Answer 5

Confronting him suggests to him thast there is no trust in the relationship. And he obviously feels comfortable lying to you and so he is capable of lying about anything, yes even cheating.
I would confront him about it, and if he asks why you went through the wallet steer the conversation in the direction you want it. Dont let him change the point ....
There can be no 'good' reason for lying and so explain to him that in a marriage there should be no secrets or lies.....that doing things like this do not instill confidence in your mind. If this was not a marriage I would suggest a break or if it was something he was not willing to discuss then leaving him. But in a marriage, I would work with him and see why he felt the need to lie to you?

If you need more advice or help.....email me..

Answer 6

I can definitely relate to this. I sense that my husband does the same thing. I find that I always spend my last few dollars in order to take care of things in our home--groceries, bills, gas for the cars-I also hate to worry about him having to travel to work without money in his pocket. But when it's the other way around and I am broke, he'll tell me that he is too, but come home with new clothes or wine or music cds. I would say that confronting him is the best way to go about it, although, in my personal experience, I have not seemed to make any progress so far with this disgusting, irresponsible and dishonest behavior that he exhibits. I wish you all the best!

Answer 7

Personally, I wouldn't say anything. I would just watch and wait and see from a detached perspective his general behavior for the next week. Is he normally trustworthy? Do you have other sneaking suspicions? There is a reason you didn't believe him and looked in his wallet to begin with. Could he be saving for xmas? Does he not smoke and doesn't want to fund your habit? Do you guys normally share your money? Gotta ask yourself some questions before confronting. Good luck.

Answer 8

There should be no reason to lie about something about that. Couples are MUTUAL in every aspect. You need milk or stuff around the house its essentials. Unlesss you have previously borrowed a lot of money for stupid stuff. I would definately confront though. It may lead to a big argument but keeping feelings from him is also a lie.

Answer 9

the last thing you want to do is tell him you looked in his wallet. just go get the stuff if he has q good bone in his body he wont let you walk around broke my ex use to do that all the time but i could always count on him to come out with money when i was down to my last dime. it wouldnt be little money either but that is not the reason we broke up. just be thankful if that is hie reason for lieing to you wait and see what happens

Answer 10

Maybe your husband has a trust issue with your ability to budget the money you do have control over. More than likely, he is just saving it, possibly for a Christmas gift. Just from the little you have disclosed I would say your relationship has trouble dealing with absolute honesty. I was married to the same woman for 10 years, and I never went through her purse... The bottom line is that curiosity killed the cat, and now that you have discovered he is keeping things from you, you feel guilty about being deceitful yourself. I would stay quiet about your little secret and try to resolve any trust issues you may have with yourselves.