Parenting Styles!! Are there differences between single mothers of different ethnic backgrounds? For example,

Question

I am bi-racial, black and Japanese. My mother is Japanese so her style of parenting was different from American women in general.

From what I have been told, white mothers have the tendency to be friends first then the parent with their children while black mothers are the parent first then as the friend. I know that this can’t be true or is it? Also, what are some of the differences if any between mothers?

I posed this question because my father recently made a comment that if I ever got involved with a white woman make sure her children are well behaved and disciplined.

Any thoughts?

Answer 1

Trying to put a label on something like this is impossible.

Each parent. uses a little bit of how they were raised, what they've observed, and what they think is the right way to raise children...they mix is all up and come up with something that works for them.

Before having children do some homework...raising children is the most important job you'll ever have....take some time to decide how you want to do it.

The most important thing you can start out with is to not be a single Mom.

Answer 2

You know, ALL single Moms struggle while raising their children as solo parents -- and even more so when the sperm donors are NOT involved in the raising of the children at all.

As a Long-Term Single Mother Myself -- yes, ALL single mothers do want respect from their children -- because as the ONLY Wage Earner (and ONLY Income source for the household) -- not only do they have to pay all the bills and do the hard work -- when they come home they STILL are doing everything -- and getting disrespected by our children is very much a problem.

The problem with Disrespect of the parents goes to this generation -- they are being raised differently -- and there are obstacles being put in the way of parenthood.

I do NOT know any single mom who is something OTHER than a PARENT FIRST -- guiding and supporting her children -- caring for them -- making sure that they are progressing in school -- showing them by their LIVES (example) and Verbally how to BE good citizens of their nation and socially responsible individuals (etc)

All this is to raise responsible adults -- and that is our goal.

The last sentence -- wow -- what a prejudicial remark. There is NO EXCUSE for spouting off racial hatred at any time -- and that is quite clear. Although I could HOPE that this type of racial HATRED would not be here anymore (and I am NOW an Empty-Nesting Single Retiree) -- in some ways, the Racial Hatred is WORSE -- and more overt in nature through the way the teens and young adults talk in today's society.

Answer 3

Once again, I think these are stereotypes that aren't true for every white mother or every black mother. I think that instead of generalizing, people need to realize that every single relationship between a white mother and white child or black mother and black child isn't always the same in every situation. I am white and my mother was white. She was my mother and then a pal. While I was growing up and living at home, she was definately a mother and not a pal. But, as I moved out of the house and onto my own, starting a family and being an adult, she became my friend. I think it's essential to know that when you are a child, your mother is a mother. However, when you become an adult, you realize that not only is your mother your mother, but she's a woman and can be an extremely good friend, as well.

Answer 4

This is true in a sense. I can't speak for black Americans, but my mom is African and she does raise kids differently from other people. It's just about your culture. I can't say what cultural family values and parenting styles work best, and I'm sure none of them truly do, but I was raised with different values than most Americans. They don't all call older people "Auntie" and "Uncle", even when they are your cousin and/or you don't know them. It isn't wrong for their parents to greet them first. It is okay for them to give older people things with their left hand. There is nothing wrong with different ethnicities raising kids differently, it's all a factor of our culture.

Answer 5

As the daughter of a minority single-mother, I believe that all single mothers raise their single differently. But I also believe that women of different cultures raise their children differently from one another as well. It's not necessarily a race issue rather than how you were raised and the different values and aspects of your particular culture that were instilled.

Answer 6

I actually strongly agree that white mothers seem to want to be their children's "pal" over a parent because they are too afraid that their kids won't "like" them. It's all this pop psychology crap. And it is indeed crap. But at any rate, ANY woman you get involved with who has kids, proceed cautiously for your own protection. A ready made family can be a huge burden.

Answer 7

Children who are raised by black mothers are more appreciative and respectful towads them. Black women demand respect and they teach it.