i dont know what i have this feeling right now,i admit im still inluv my husband eventhough he gave me a lot of pain and heartache.sometimes i cant help it to cry especially when when im looking a happy family.My husband betrayed me and cheted me alot of times and now he is living with somebody.he wants to come back with me again but i didnt accept him because everytime im thinking of all the pain he gave to me i feels like he crashing my heart.The LAST TIME i talked to him i said dont call me anymore and dont bother my life and my kids anymore and i told him that i will not push him anymore for the childsupport for our kids,because his not really responsible father for my kids and he also have kids with the other girl,not this new girl.but the mother of his two kids in states they are separated now and have a new one in his life now.i didint know all about this until his mother told me that.i was so stupid i admit it just that i trusted him so much.how can i move on with this?
2006-12-09 01:20:32 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Therapy
2006-12-09 01:24:43 · answer #1 · answered by SweetBrunette 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You were not stupid. You were vulnerable and you were looking for love. You do need to move on, though, and you need to start gathering friends around, getting out a bit with the children. looking at life, I suppose, outside of the pain.
Anything you can think of to do, a hobby, whatever. But before you move on - grieve. As somone said to me, allow yourself to grieve, because it doesn't go away, it just festers. the sooner you cry, wail, scream, allow the hurt to wash you over and spin you out, the shorter the pain cycle, and the sooner hope will be restored, and you will give yourself enough credit to find love.
It sounds like he is not responsible, all around. It sounds like you deserve better. But ultimately, the choice is yours.
2006-12-09 01:45:57 · answer #2 · answered by Sugar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut off all contact with this loser - or he will continue to bring you down, if you allow it. Get a lawyer, and enforce any financial responsibility that he has - regardless of your feelings. You need to harden your heart, and put yourself and your children first - obviously he hasn't. I know it's a cliche, but there ARE other fish in the sea, and you can find one who respects you. It seems he uses you when he's in between girlfriends. Move on - get happy.
2006-12-09 02:14:38 · answer #3 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess what you're feeling is normal, but good god the whining. So what! You're marriage turned to crap. I haven't met anyone who isn't happier out of a crappy marriage than they were in one. You've got an opportunity to go out and have some fun and to live a life your way. It might be convenient, but do you really need a husband to live a good and happy life? If you find the right guy, great!, but in the meantime, relax, let go, have some fun. Get out while you can.
2006-12-09 01:25:48 · answer #4 · answered by Hank Hill 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Forgiving him is good. But never, ever forget what your feeling right now. Pain is a part of life and a even bigger part of love. You have forgiven him now its time to forgive yourself. Stop blaming yourself ( I was so stupid). You did nothing wrong. Give yourself time to heal and then get back out there. There are still men in this world willing to treat you like the queen you are.
good luck
2006-12-09 01:31:36 · answer #5 · answered by DEBBY'S BABY 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he only wants to come back, because it hasn't worked out with him and his girlfriend. sometimes we fall in love with someone who we don't know that well, and later on we have regrets. don't go back to him but file for child support, get what belongs to your kid's. no matter how many children he has, he still needs to be made responsible for these children too. u are still upset, as u wanted what every other woman wants, an homest good man, but he isn't the one, divorce him, and find some peace. u have already forgiven him enough times.
2006-12-09 06:45:59 · answer #6 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off this guy is a LOSER and ABUSER! Get him out of your life and find someone who makes you happy. This guy is in love with only one person and that's his selfish SELF!!!! You don't want someone like that in your children's life or for them to see you don't respect yourself if you let him be apart of your life. Good luck and make good decisions for you and your family...
2006-12-09 01:29:48 · answer #7 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree w/most of the above. Don't take him back. Raise your kids w/o him. THEY are better off. Let him abuse someone else if they'll tolerate it.
2006-12-09 01:41:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to get child support for your children, other than that stop whining and feeling sorry for yourself. move on.
2006-12-09 01:32:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋