Why do some people think it's okay to abuse their spouses?

Question

I am a survivor of spousal abuse, and I cannot fathom why some people think it's all right to abuse their wives(or husbands)or even joke about it...don't they understand that spousal or boyfriend/girlfriend abuse destroys lives, especially if the couple has kids that have to witness the abuse? I just wish some people would think before they act!

Cowboy, I was lucky that I was able to leave my ex and stay in a women's shelter. Some women don't have that option because some places don't have services for abused women..and staying with a relative makes it easy for the ex to find you and beat you up worse, or kill you....and some ex'es think that restraining orders are a joke.

Answer 1

It is sad when little children are involved.These people were probably brought up in those abuse type situations in their homes themselves. One of the biggest mistakes about abuse is no one that witnesses it wants to get involved.
Another thing few realizes is stress at work is blamed, and rightly so in many instances, where 1st level bosses bully workers and sometimes whole work cultures support these stressful situations, not knowing or caring what it does to a family when the stress is taken home and taken out on spouses and children.
Women especially, should seek help from any means available. Usually the abusers will not get the help needed to change and the wife keeps believing the husband when he says he has changed, until it happens again. And again. And again
...jj

Answer 2

NO.NO.NO.NO.NO....It is not okay to abuse anyone. If you are in an abusive relationship, no matter how much you love the person , you need to get out....things could get very bad and the mental scars never heal. As far as jokes go, I know I would never allow someone to joke about that in front of me. No one has a right to verbally or physically abuse anyone, no matter what.Please remember that, I hope you are out of that situation.

Answer 3

Those who abuse, usually have been abuse!
They are people of mental illness and they need help to quit the violence. Its sad if that violence gets to kinds, that will destroy their lives and make them sick as they grow up!
Going to a psychologist doesn't make less of a person, instead it can help stabilize someone in a way that they can face the society without being disrespected for their ill actions.

Answer 4

Why do spouses take the abuse? why don't they leave? my wife's sister lived in hell all her life but, you couldn't talk her into leaving. Her husband was a drunk and wife beater, he even threatened her with a gun several times. She thought he was the greatest man that ever lived. after she passed on, he was shacking with another woman within a few months.

Answer 5

They lack the intelligence to see what they are really doing. They also like to use this a a leverage to get their way with you and to set a 'BAD' example for the kids. If he scares them now, they'll be afraid of later and he wont have the 'hassle'.

Mark

Answer 6

it's never okay and its a form of people trying to bully other people and if they ever get reported and sent to jail they should attend classes of how not to be abusive and in cases where they refuse or they becomes a repeat offender they should be immediately put to jail and throw out the keys until they die.

Answer 7

There'r some people in the world who live to abuse each other .
And they think that all the world like them .

Answer 8

Because they are jerks and obviously damn ignorant. You are better off alone that in a relationship with an abuser.

Answer 9

The sins of the father will be passed unto his son's for seven generations.

Answer 10

It's definitly wrong but some people are just so impossible it's understandable to me why some spouses get beat.