Do you have an issue with your husband/bf/fiance saying the "N" word? I can't stand that word - I nkow the history behind it and I refuse to use it, nor would it ever be accepted for me as a white woman to use it. But I sometimes hear my husband saying it when he's talking with his friends at work and they call each other that - yes it edns with an "a" but I don't see the difference. Some people consider a part of hip hop culture to use that word to speak to another black person - but I don't care. I don't want it in my home. My step daughter and her sister tried saying that ni my home a couple years ago and I was quick to shut that down and explained that it was an insult to herself and she shouldn't say it and I don't allow it in my house. But is there really anyway to stop it - it's in almost every hip hop or rap song.
So I'm not looking for any racist idiotic comments - just real answers from others in a similar situation - am I the only one this bugs? Should it bug me?
2006-12-08 14:23:37 · 10 answers · asked by Rae T 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
Thank you to the people who answered normally. And to clarify - my husband doesn't say it around his daughter or her sister because he knows I hate it. My SD's sister was 5 when I hear her say it and her mom uses the term all the time so she thought nothing of it. My husband and I have a child together and I just don't want her to think it's ok - ya know?
2006-12-08 14:45:07 · update #1
You are not the only one it bothers. I'm not in an interracial relationship but have many friends of all races. I hear that word quite alot and just have to shake my head. Alot of my friends that are black are just as offended as I when they hear it. It's horrible when you hear an elementary aged child saying words like that or even worse. What are we teaching our kids? As parents we need to instill in them this type of language is just wrong.
2006-12-08 14:34:13 · answer #1 · answered by bugoff26 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im not in your situation, but im mixed with white and black. I dont use it because i feel that same way you do. It should bug you because the history behind the word is full of hate and ignorance. I dont think that it is acceptable for anyone to use that word even if they are black or even if it does have an a at the end. When it comes down to it, when i white person says that word around black people, they black people get offended, and it's dumb, because they use it too. No one should use it, its a horrible reminder of that past.
2006-12-08 14:29:25 · answer #2 · answered by Ridin' Dirty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it should bother you. He shouldn't be saying it around you or your children. But you have to understand where your husband is coming from too. I am white. When I am talking with my friends, about half the time we use each other's names. The other times it's dikkhead, dirtball, cocksmith, etc. Using derogatory terms towards your guy friends is just a guy thing. If we spoke that way to anybody else it would be offensive, but it is not to each other. The only reason you have a problem with the N word is because it is such a politically charged word and there exists an ENORMOUS double standard concerning its use.
2006-12-08 14:35:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I kind of know what you are feeling. I am white and my wife is black. I asked her why it was alright for blacks to use that word and if I were to say it, I would get my head kicked in.
She hates it and feels that it is wrong in all aspects. She said that "*****" is used like the word "brother" and that the "N" word that ends with an R was a derogatory word first used by slave owners and whites.
We were all created equal in the eyes of God.
2006-12-08 14:36:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember someone saying, "If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a n----r, be he black OR white." I find the term derogatory, no matter its usage. Personal opinion.
2006-12-08 14:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by Sels 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's okay to feel that way. There is no purpose in using that word. Let him know that he can substitute it for another word: fella, partner, brother, player, etc...... That specific word does not have to be used.
2006-12-08 14:49:07 · answer #6 · answered by ♥michele♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question. I could never understand it myself.....it is just accepted, I guess.....but it depends on how you say it to someone else....and I hear white people calling other white people that name!!?? How does that work????
2006-12-08 14:28:19 · answer #7 · answered by ~MEEEOW~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! Fine you've made your point. Now take a Valium and go to bed. I don't mind Blacks, it's N****s I can't stand.
2006-12-08 14:37:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
the US is nothing but a cespool anymore, RAP is absolute crap, It's America and Abe Lincoln is to blame for everything.
I have seen the truth, GOD HIMSELF IS PISSED!
2006-12-08 14:26:42 · answer #9 · answered by Cyrax 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
my black friends say it all the time, i dont like it when mexicans say that cuz they white
2006-12-08 14:36:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋