What can i do if i practicaly hate my mom. i don't want to hate her but she wo'nt let me go out at all. not even with my friends that come to the house and she allready knows really good. i am 18 and allready have a son. she won't even let me talk on the phone more than 10 minutes. please give me some advice. SERIOUS ADVICE.
2006-12-08 12:20:42 · 24 answers · asked by Meli 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
If you are 18 and have a son, you should get a job, go to school and have your own place. As long as you live in your mother's house, you're going to have to live by her rules. Going out with your friends and having fun is part of childhood. You sacrificed that when you had a child. Good luck.
2006-12-08 12:23:46 · answer #1 · answered by Rebecca 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No matter what, she is your Mother and she's doing what she feels is best for you. She loves you and that's why she is being strict.
My sister had 2 children by the time she was 18. She moved out, lived in the projects with the children's loser father....(they are not together now)...thought she could party and still raise those kids...She regrets now moving out 10 yrs ago. She didn't like my parents' rules. They were only trying to make her step up to the plate and act like an adult.
Are you financial able to be on your own? Are you taking steps to get on the track to be on your own? (school, work, savings?)
I know you are going through a rough time with your new life, but when you live in your Mom's house, please respect her and her rules. You aren't going to like them, or agree....but years down the road, you will appreciate everything she's sacrificed for you. As for the phone issue...were you ignoring your baby while you were chatting? Don't expect your Mom to care for your baby when he cries, needs a diaper change. When your baby naps, nap too...that'll give you some much needed rest and a clear mind when your son wakes up.
Keep up with the laundry, housecleaning....make it easier living for all of you. Show your Mom you are mature and can tend to house and a son. She might see the steps you are taking and respect that and maybe one night....she'll offer to babysit so you can have a nice evening out with friends....just remember not to take it too far and come home too late. Just make it dinner at a friend's house and enjoy the company. Or ask your mom if a friend or two can come to dinner (that you will make and clean up) and watch a movie (and you will take care of your son, as your friends will probably want to hold him and play with him...show him off!)
Good Luck Girl!
2006-12-08 20:38:20 · answer #2 · answered by X Ray Tech and Mother 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, You are 18 and even though you are at that adult age- you are still a child/baby to your mother. You only feel hate because you can't have your way with her and she only solidifies that with great conviction. Parents usually see things that their children can't and have different ways in which to protect and guide them, which may feel controlling and underhanded where privacy is concerned. Face it- when a child is born they don't come with a manual like most things, Parents nurture you and begin to mold your very personality the second you are born, but at some point we as children develop our own sense of direction. You're 18 with a child, maybe she just wants to be their for both of you. You live under her roof, so it's her rules. Compromise with your mom, talk to her and figure out why she has been so intrusive in your private life, you might be surprised to find out what she is really thinking.:)
2006-12-08 20:40:19 · answer #3 · answered by DRP 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has she always been this way? Not to pry but, How did she feel about you having a baby? If she didn't like it and she hasn't always been this way with you then she could be angry with you for having the baby. shes angry and bitter and taking it out on you. IF this happens to be the case, then sit down with her and say" look mom, I know i may have made the wrong choice in your eyes by having the baby at a young age. But i do love him/her very much and i wouldn't trade him for the world. mom i cant go back and redo what i did. its in the past and all i can do is be the best mom i can be. I'm really sorry that what i did hurt you. please forgive me. I know it may take some time for you to get over the pain that ive caused by what i did, and that's OK. I'm a grown woman now mom and i would really appreciate it if you would find it in your heart to treat me like an adult, although at times im sure i don't act like one. but the Important thing is, i am trying. so please give me that chance to show you that I'm going to be OK and allow me to do alittle more than you've aloud me to do. i love you mom."
Now this advice is only if what i said applies to your situation.
i wish you would have let a little more info for us.
good luck and congrats on your little one:)
2006-12-08 20:37:18 · answer #4 · answered by Crissy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you through with school? If so then get a job and get out!! Why are you still there anyways? If not Talk to her and explain why you need to go out. She can not tell you what to do anymore but if you are in her house that is another story. When did you have your son? That is probably why she will not let you do anything. Were you young like 15 or 16?
2006-12-08 20:36:44 · answer #5 · answered by mommy of 2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if u r 18 and already have a son get out of her house wat the **** are you thinking..shes nice enough to even let you live while having a son so young shes trying to help you. now that you have ur son think about something else like school things and how to raise ur son good instead of being on the phone all the time and bringing friends over. your mom is only doing this for you own good imagine if one of these days she dies..you not gunna be able to even live in a house you are nothing without her!!!
2006-12-08 22:42:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advise would be to move out. If you're 18 with a child, I would think you must have a job. Does your Mom babysit for you? Do you leave your child with her while you go out. If you do, she has a right to ask where you're going and when you'll be back.
Is she really mean, or is she just trying to do what's best for you?
It's really hard to give advice without hearing your Mom's side of the story.
good luck
2006-12-08 20:26:55 · answer #7 · answered by bobbie v 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are 18, with a son and living with your mom, you have to abide by her rules... I know that sucks, and she does sound strict, but she is supporting you, and technically your an adult. Consider moving out, if you can afford it. Maybe try and do more around the house, offer to pay rent, etc... She may come around if she feels like your more responsible.
2006-12-08 20:23:48 · answer #8 · answered by Jessica 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should consider moving out. if you have a son you are entitled to your own place, and the council will supply you one, you just need to get yourself on the housing list, and your entitled to benefits to help you out.
don't listen to what people are saying on here, you are not stupid for having a child young. your mum should treat you like an adult, and her talking down to you is not setting a very good example for you son.
maybe you should sit down with her, have a serious chat. or maybe if she moans at you, bite your lip. if you show maturity by not responding, then your mum will notice this, and might lay off a bit.
2006-12-08 20:30:48 · answer #9 · answered by lucy h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it seems to me that your mom is beign over protected. and you 18 and have a kid so that means your old enough to have a kid so your old enough to make your own decisions, you do not like how your mom is acting well just get a job and move out. you still living in her house and got to respect her and her house sorry honey but thats the it is in reallity. good luck with that :)
2006-12-08 20:27:58 · answer #10 · answered by ❤נαcкiε❤ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋