My husband and I have been together 7 years, married 2 years. We have had problems from the start. He comes from a religious background and he pretty much prefers porn and masturbation to sex. I am a very sexual person. Hence the problem. We have discussed it numerous times, and things get better for a while. But never for long. He's always sneaking around and pretty much blowing off any sexual advances I make. I am only 27 and not ready to give up sex yet. I need advice.
2006-12-08 05:06:42 · 12 answers · asked by blissathome 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am 26 and am in a very similar situation. My sexy life with my wife was great for the two years we dated, but once we got engaged it went downhill and has been terrible for the year and a half we've been married. I feel as though I didn't get what I bargained for and am seriously considering divorce because of this issue. Because it is so bad at home, it makes me feel like straying to satisfy my needs. I won't do that, though, because I wouldn't want to cheat on my wife. Thus, I must brak things off with her to find fufillment.
I think you should seriously consider getting divorced!
2006-12-08 05:31:59 · answer #1 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you have made what is supposed to be a LIFE TIME COMMITMENT to this man and MARRIED him, if you had had sexual problems from the start, I mean after 5 years of dating him, did you not get the clue that he wasn't going to change. Hey, if things kept going back to where you didn't like them after 5 long years then you should have learned that it was good for awhile then bad, and if you hung in there for 5 years then it can't be all that bad. Sex is a huge part of marriage and I would have never married a man who sexually wasn't compatible with me, i would have moved on long before 5 years of dating. I am sorry for you really, but you shouldn't have married him, you made a commitment and marriage isn't supposed to be disposable. You knew and now you have to learn to deal with it.
2006-12-08 05:11:31 · answer #2 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's grounds for divorce. Start compounding your case. And go with it. Sex is a huge part of a marriage. The courts know this. Get out while you're young enough to start over.
2006-12-08 05:11:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't leave him for this reason alone. If he prefers porn to having sex with you there is a possibility thet he is intimidated by sex. I think you should explore that possibility before leaving. Do you have someone on the side or have you ever cheated?
2006-12-08 05:11:39 · answer #4 · answered by curious george 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not comfortable w/ expressing his sexual fantasies w/ you. Some how he needs to realize that sex is not embarrassing. Finds some books on this subject. Try to talk to him. Ask him what turns him on. Maybe he will losen up w/ a few drinks. I don't know. You have to ask HIM though.
2006-12-08 05:11:40 · answer #5 · answered by truebeing3030 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends... If you can't accept his way of handling things (ok, no pun intended) - then you pretty much have no choice but to leave. If this has been an ongoing issue, it should have been clear long ago that by and large, such fundamental differences will persist no matter what. He will not change; please don't waste any more time than you already have, you ain't getting any younger.
2006-12-08 05:14:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The problem is not sexual incompatability, the problem is he doesn't care about your needs or want to make the relationship work.
That's cause for divorce.
2006-12-08 07:27:44 · answer #7 · answered by kheserthorpe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it is, but try to fix it first, the bigger question is why did you marry him in the first place if you knew this was a problem for you.
2006-12-08 05:34:48 · answer #8 · answered by scout1567 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try therapy. I could loan you my Karma Sutra book...oh wait, my roommate stole it from me. Buy one on line and try watching some porn with him. Compromise is key.
2006-12-08 05:14:30 · answer #9 · answered by DivaDynamite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try going to a sex theripist. or my daughter says a karma sutra book might help u too....good luck
2006-12-08 05:10:00 · answer #10 · answered by Michele 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋