What do you do when they want to talk bad about you?

Question

My guy friend and I have been seeing one another for a while and we had an argument and I told him to just leave me alone. The problem, we live in a small town and he is running everywhere talking about what a horrible person that I am. Why, because I did not let him walk all over me and use me. I have two boys and I am not going to let any man treat me any other way than with respect. I deserve that because why? I demand it. I am a very giving person and I am not selfish but I am no whore either and that is the picture he is trying to portray. What do you do when you check your email and their are hundreds of them telling you what a sorry individual you are. He has no room to belittle anyone. His dad takes care of his two kids and even has to do their laundry. How do I get him to shut up and move on down the road? Help me.

Answer 1

Let your actions show that you are not the person he's trying to make you out to be. Small towns are good for one thing - people watch you and see your character. Your own reputation as a good, caring person can take care of what he trys to say about you. Delete the negative emails without responding to them. Keep your head up, teach your boys to respect women when they grow up, and keep showing that town what a good person you are. People with their heads on straight will see through lies to the truth.

Answer 2

Girlfriend why are you letting this bother you ?? These people that believe him don't know you and are not your friends--Your real friends don't listen to his garbage they know you are a good person and Mom --He is a looser that need to run others down to make themselves look better--after a while people get wise to this type of person and don't listen anymore --As far as the E-mail change your address--or be the bigger person and even write back to them and tell them Thank You for taking the time for the impute that is is only making you stronger to know that they have nothing better to do than make judgment on someone they don't even know --(remember is they did they would not be sending you trash) But whatever you do don't feed the fire and give him the time of day--always be a lady when you see him --you don't have to speak to him that's what he wants that's why he is spreading trash to get you mad so you will talk to him--just avoid him if possible and let all those around you that you are a lady
God Bless you in your small town from another who is also in a small town :-)

Answer 3

I am sure you have spoken to him about this already.Hon,this guy is NOT A FRIEND in any sense of the word and your sons don't need to see there mom treated like this.No man or woman with any integrity would do what he is doing.If the emails are from him them make sure you save them in a "folder"in your computer/or on the email program.Print them out if you can.This is harrassment and personal slander.Personal slander via email is prosecutable under the law(check with your District Court Clerk).If you know of anyone who has recieved email from him regarding you,nasty ones,request a printed copy or have them forward to you for evidence if you ever need them.Harrassment also may be an issue here and I am not sure if you feel threatened by him,doesn't have to be physical threats either.In the event that is the case,talk to your local police regarding a restraining order if it gets to that point.Now if you just want it to go away the indicate to your email that all email from this man is "JUNK'remove his email address from your email address contacts and raise your junk mail option to high.Good luck!!Take care of yourself and your boys!!seocat

Answer 4

First let me congratulate u on not letting a man control u...the only reason he is belittling u is because he has low self esteem...and figures if he makes u look bad then he will look like the good guy in all of this. As for the email, get a new addy or block all of the low lifes that cant mind their own damn business as for getting him to shut up...i really dont know except to have someone beat the crap outta him...good luck

Answer 5

Take him to small claims court and sue him for slander. Show the judge how this has hurt you and your children. You will only win if you can prove what he says isn't true. Print all of those emails. Don't take him back ever. The fact that he has his dad taking care of his responsibilities is indicative of the irresponsible individual he is. Be glad he is out of your life and away from your children. Don't frequent any of the places he would go to. Change your phone number and focus on your children and work.

Answer 6

The thing i think i would do is try and take no notice
people who know you will no you are a decent caring person if people wanna listen to that person and believe that person they are not worth knowing
#just hold your head up high your a better person for taking no notice of a horried little person
good luck
respect
shaz

Answer 7

It sound like you already know what you have to do. He knows his sh*t is messed up so he is trying to bring you down in order to build himself up. Don't let him lower your self esteem. Believe me if he is what you say he is, other know it as well and probably knew it before you so let him talk. As far as emails, you can block harassing emails. If he starts to nut-up, get a restraining order. In a small town, he will only make himself look worse. Your kids are a priority as I am sure you already know, so take care of them forget about him.

Answer 8

he is telling everyone what kind of person he is using you for the reason, because he is not man eon ugh to take care of his own responsibilities and needs some one else to put down in order for him to feel better about him self, and the worst part of it all after he has done all this, he still feels and is the same way, people like this needs to find them selves, and you can do all you can to help them, but they must first help them selves, get on with your life, you have two children to live for and God.

Answer 9

I think you honestly examine yourself to see if there is any truth to what he is saying.

Likewise, it's great to have a friend who is not afraid to tell you when you are messed up.

I treat everything as "what if she is right?" and pick what I and/or my best friend think is true and work on that aspect of myself.

You can't get him to shut up. To do so would be controlling and you wouldn't want him to try to get you to do something, so there is something right there for you to work on.

Who really cares what he has his dad do.

Answer 10

I would flat out tell him if he didnt knock the crap off i was going to sue him for slader of character and harrasment.... there is no easy way to deal with people like that.... I would save all the e-mails just incase you would need them in the future..... But i would ignore people and countinue with my life loving and providng fro my family and in due time everything will be old news.