My boyfriend want to have sex with me daily, and if I tell him that I dont want it, or im sleepy he gets mad and wants to fight me. And when we do have sex I find it very uncomfortable, when I tell him to stop he wont. Either he would pull my hair or he would hold my harms down and get on top of me if I tried to get up. I have another child by him, and he does that right in front of her. What can I change to make his sex better, and to stop him from doing this too me?
2006-12-08 03:34:13 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Darling...this is not a good situation at all!!! I am 5 months preggers and my guy has not had sex with me but twice since I found out at 9 weeks I was pregnant. I do give him bj's and help him out...and I def. dont mind if he watches porn. I know he misses me and wants to have sex with me...but he also understands that I just dont want it or I get worried I will hurt the baby...major mental block. The difference is, he would never force me to do anything that I dont want to do. I do like a little bit of rough sex...pulling hair and stuff...but def. not while I am pregnant!!!
There is a serious problem here if he is forcing you to have sex. Even if you are married or in a relationship, if you say no...and he continues it is rape. I would walk away from my guy if he ever did that...no matter the fact that I am carrying his son. You need to take a stand. Him being on top of you can be really dangerous...if he is holding your arms down that means that he has laying on your belly, and while that may okay for another month...he can hurt the baby if he puts his full weight on you when you get a big belly.
The fact that he does this in front of your other child scares me...I dont even like to have the dog in the room when we have sex. I dont understand why you are in this relationship. It sounds to me like he is controling and forceful...has he ever hit you?? That may be the next step.
Hmmmm...if I were you I would do the following. Get a doctor's appt. Tell him that you are having problems with him wanting to have sex with you and you are uncomfortable. If he is with you...take the doctor out in private and tell him. Then ask him to say in front of your man, that he is worried about the cervix and length...that you should refrain from having sex until he sees you again...and that means no sex at all...nothing entering the vagina. It could cause you to go into pretterm labor. Then everytime he sees you after that, he can keep telling you. If your guy does not come with you then I would get him to write it down so your guy can read it. Most doctors will do this for you to help you out. I know mine would if I asked. That way there is medical proof that you cannot have sex. If he still forces you that is rape, and you need to get out. He obviously does not care about you or the baby!!!
Go to the doctor and do this...I know he will do it for you if you ask him. He is not really liying...bc if he has too rough of sex with you it could hurt the baby!!!
Sweetie...you need to do something!!!
2006-12-08 03:53:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest instead of trying to make him happy and allowing him to do this to...especially in front your child...get away from him. What he is doing is called abuse and I know its not easy especially being preg and everything but this is very wrong. I think that its uncomfortable for you because a part of doesn't really want to in the first place which is normal and you have that right at any given time preg or not! You don't have to put up with this..in fact no body should. I had a similiar problem when I was preg and I talked to him about it and when that didn't work I left him for a couple of days to think about what it would be like to now have me around and what not and it seemed to knock some sense into him. Take care of yourself and child and the your unborn baby before worrying about him. Good Luck!
2006-12-08 03:58:32 · answer #2 · answered by MLP 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it won't affect the baby...your sister in law has obviously been misinformed. She is probably confused because there are some studies that suggest that marijuana can cause a decreased sperm count in men and she has gotten it mixed up somewhere along the way. Ask your doctor and he will tell you the same thing. Even if you yourself smoked weed the only thing it causes (and this is HIGHLY disputable) is a possible low birth rate, though even birth rates don't really account for anything in the long run.
2016-05-23 06:37:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl what you need to do is tell him if he does not stop. you will the police for abuse. if you want your unborn child to be safe you need to get out of an abusive relationship just tell him him that you are uncomfortable. You could also call your parents to help you gather a few clothes and spend a few days away from him that should help him stop what hes doing but leave before he gets their so that he can come home to an empty house trust me i'v done this to my boyfriend before and it worked big time and he was constantly calling me to beg me to come back home and i did and he apologized right as soon as i walked in the door
2006-12-08 03:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by flower_1988_s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is It Safe to Have Sex During Pregnancy?
If you're having a normal pregnancy, sex is considered safe during all stages of the pregnancy.
So what's a "normal pregnancy"? It's one that's considered low-risk for complications such as miscarriage or pre-term labor. Talk to your doctor, nurse-midwife, or other pregnancy health care provider if you're uncertain about whether you fall into this category. (The next section of this article may help, too.)
Of course, just because sex is safe during pregnancy doesn't mean you'll necessarily want to have it! Many expectant mothers find that their desire for sex fluctuates during certain stages in the pregnancy. Also, many women find that sex becomes uncomfortable as their bodies get larger.
You and your partner need to keep the lines of communication open regarding your sexual relationship. Talk about other ways to satisfy your need for intimacy, such as kissing, caressing, and holding each other. You also may need to experiment with other positions for sex to find those that are the most comfortable.
Many women find that they lose their desire and motivation for sex late in the pregnancy - not only because of their size but also because they're preoccupied with the impending delivery and the excitement of becoming a new parent.
“Sexual assault is defined as any sexual act performed by one person on another without that person’s consent. Important components of the definition include the use or threat of force, the inability of the victim to give appropriate consent, or both.” Subtypes of sexual assault include spousal rape and date rape, which can also be regarded as forms of intimate partner violence. “Spousal rape is often more violent and repetitive than other rape and is less commonly reported because of the woman’s economic dependency and sense of humiliation about marital
failure.
2006-12-08 03:45:34 · answer #5 · answered by Sharon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1 you should not let your daughter see that because that is dramatizing her. and 2 you shouldn't be with a man that does not give you the right as a women. what he does to you is considered rape. It is good to have sex when you are pregnant, so you cervix can open more, but to do it with abuse and strangh can harm the baby. I think he is a disgusting man to let his daughter look at him doing you. That is child abuse and molestation. You need to find someone that treats you like a queen not like a slave.
2006-12-08 03:42:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG I was going to totally tell you some different sexual postions but girl I am telling you right now if you lov your children and value your life leave right now! Get your sh*t and you baby girls sh*t and go. Go back home, to a friends house, call ome churches someone will help you. This is fuked! He is raping you. Did you know that? He is raping you in front of your daughter!!!!! If this was your mother or your daughter this was happening to what would you tell them to do? You'd tell em to get outta there. Girl call the cops if you are scared. Please just get outta there. You know what call the cops have em come out to your house while you pack. Please don't try to leave without some protection. Don't let him know you are leaving. I'm really afraid he might hurt you or the baby. If it huts for you to have sex then its probably hurting the baby too! PLEASE get outta there and lemme know when you do this name is my yahoo messenger name im_32_flavors_and_then_some until then girl I pray you are safe.
2006-12-08 04:01:54 · answer #7 · answered by Kimi is 31 weeks 1/7 w/#2! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie not to sound too blunt, but you need to find a women's shelter or family you can go stay with. This is abuse and it doesn't get better. It only gets worse. You are not the only one in danger but your 2 children are also. I know you don't want to leave. I've been there, but do it now before you or your children get hurt or worse are killed.
2006-12-08 03:39:54 · answer #8 · answered by askywalkersmom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Run away from this guy as fast as you can. He's physically and sexually abusing you. He should be in jail, not in bed next to you. For the sake of you and your children this man should be as far away from you as possible. Find a good shelter or support group and let them help you through it. Would you want an abuser like this to raise your children if he kills you?
2006-12-08 03:39:40 · answer #9 · answered by c_a_cudmore 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to take your child and get out of there and call the cops thats called rape. you cant make sex any better you are swollen down there do to more blood flowing. sex hurts when pregnant. this so called man is abusing you and your child get out now before this does serious damage to this child and get counseling
2006-12-08 03:36:56 · answer #10 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋