What to do when your wife doesnt spend time with you?

Question

I have been having problems the past couple of months trying to get my wife to be home more to spend time with me and our 1 yr old daughter. She goes to church all the time, not that I have a problem with it, I could care less about her going to church, the problem is that she will leave and go an hour early and stay out an hr or so after church is over. It is starting to cause alot of stress on me and our family. What to do?

I do go to church on the days I dont have to work. And I am not blaming Church for our problems. I have talked to my wife numerous times about how I feel and she keeps saying that she promises things will change and they never do. And to clarify things, its not the going to church that bothers me. I love God just as much as she does and I love church as well.

Answer 1

Don't listen to all of these people that tell you just to leave her. Take the mature approach to this situation, and talk honestly and openly with your wife. Tell her exactly what you told us, that you would like her to home more often to spend time with her family. Make sure that she knows that you support her church going habits, but also make sure that she knows that her family needs her as well. Good luck!

Answer 2

You are describing my mother to a tee. There is too much of a good thing and it is called a fanatic. My mother neglected us so much over church. Talk to her and let her know that she does not have to choose between you and God, but she also has an obligation to her family. My mother had a lot of emotional problems and I think that was the way she dealt with them. She regrets it now, but at the time she couldn't see beyond anything other that church. But I promise you it will have a negative impact on your daughter. My brothers and I got to the point were we hated church because it was a competition for our mother's attention.

I do believe that some churches put alot of pressure on the patrons to dedicate their time and lives to the church. Why don't you two find a church that has a better understanding of family obligations. If she is unwilling then you will need to figure out if she is just reaching for help for some underlying problem. I am not saying God should be put on the back burner, but i think he will understand that you need her too.

Answer 3

Have you thought that maybe she is spending alot of time at church because maybe it is possible that she is going threw a difficult time in her life and is seeking God's salvation? Something she needs to work out herself. Her problem can be hormone related due to having a one year old. Or maybe she regrets something she has done. You should talk to her with understanding and love to try to get to the bottom of it all.
Also maybe you should check up on her to see what exactly it is that she is doing in church an hour earlier and later!?
Is she consulting a priest? Is she really there? So many ?'s.

Answer 4

Since the two of you have a strong connection within the church. You have already tried to talk to her, the next step I would take is to go to the Pastor and ask him for some intervention and counseling. This is really unhealthy for a relationship. I would wonder why she is spending so much time at the Church and feeling that it is ok to take so much time from her marriage and family. She needs to get her priorities in order here, and surely this is not what God has in mind. I would place this in God's hands and have some serious prayer time with him. He will give you the answers you are seeking. Good luck and God bless****

Answer 5

Honey, that is not a healthful courting. he's treating you like his new child incredibly of like a spouse. to hire somebody to do all the jobs that a stay-at-homestead mom does could cost approximately $138,0.5 a 365 days (see the link below), so even nevertheless you at the instant are not getting a paycheck, you're saving your loved ones particularly a lot of money on childcare, a maid, a chef, and so on. the guideline of whoever makes the money controls the money would not artwork in marriage. My husband is at college, so ninety% of our earnings comes from me, yet i don't for a 2nd evaluate it "my" money or tell him what he can or won't be able to purchase. We communicate super purchases (a working laptop or laptop, trip, and so on) mutually as a team, and characteristic a funds via which we each govern our very own spending. You and your husband choose some marital counseling because of the fact there are some vast themes right here! and don't enable all people provide you any of this "Your husband could provide you an allowance of $50 each week" crap. you at the instant are not 12. Marriage is a partnership, and you'll be dealt with as an equivalent.

Answer 6

I'm so grateful that you say you love the Lord.
Praise God.

Your wife is probably just trying to sort herself out.
Trust her in the Lord's hands.
Rom 8:28
All thing will work out for the greater good.

I was married to a drug addict for six years.
Friends, family, everyone told me to leave him.
I left him in God's hands.
And thanked the Lord that He would work everything out for the greater good.

Today I am married to the same man and happier than i ever though possible.

We serve a mighty God.
I can also advice two books.

"The five love languages"
"Love and Respect"

I think she'll also enjoy reading them as they are Christian based.

Answer 7

Why does she need to go an hour early and stay an hour late???
Maybe you and the baby should go with her sometime? You need to communicate with her your concerns. No, church is not bad--but she needs to put her family first here and then give the cchurch time as it is necessary.

Answer 8

I would suggest going with her and if she comes up with an excuse why you shouldn't go then church may not be where her car is making stops at or someone at church has caught her eye.

Answer 9

I am always confused by men that want to blame the wife that goes to church for the marriage troubles. Does she never ask you to go? Or is it that your lifestyle is not comfortable with a religious choice? Was she this way when you got married?
If so she should have not gotten involved with someone who was a polar opposite. Did you used to go and have now falled away from your faith/ Rediscover what you used to have if so.

Answer 10

talk to her about how this is making you feel. once in awhile take your daughter and go to church with her. suggest doing more family things.