2006-12-07 22:53:12 · 32 answers · asked by matrimony x 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is unadvisable.
2006-12-07 22:57:12 · answer #1 · answered by savingsibes 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ABSOLUTELY NOT!! There are just things that your partner doesn't need to know. Your past is the past. It made you who you are today, as the people in your past brought you to the place where you met your partner...send them a little prayer of thanks and leave it alone.
Yeah, you'll talk about some things like family, school and maybe some funny date stories once in a great while...but to lay your life out and name names and count how many of whom ever would unnecessarily hurt the person you are now with. In almost every relationship one person take things more to heart than the other at one point or another...and the past seems to always bring pain to the present. So leave your past behind you where it belongs. Answer direct questions and always be honest when asked, but don't volunteer information about your past love life. The only thing it will accomplish is a mess.
2006-12-07 23:09:01 · answer #2 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know, my husband and I had the same question arise in our relationship? We both have the preverbial "skeletons in the closet." Some issues were more emotional than others, but the truth about the way we felt about each other really came out with the dirty underwear! I can tell you that I feel so blessed to have a husband, friend, lover, partner, that I can trust with everything I am. It's also wonderful to know he feels the same with me. It's scary, though, to think about what the other person's opinion of you might be after you all "talk." Guess that's the true test of a relationship. Good luck, and best wishes. Sometimes the ugliest pictures make the most valued memories. I know that's the case with my husband and I.
2006-12-07 23:07:05 · answer #3 · answered by kryssyshell80 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No! why would you? Your past is your past and it shouldn't matter what your life was before you met your partner,
You can talk about the interesting things that happened in your past, the funny things and maybe relationships that don't matter anymore.
If you feel there are skeleton's in your cupboard that you would like to leave behind then leave them, if they crop up in the future then that's the time to be honest.
Your partner should realize that its today that matters and the future and also we should all judge everyone by what they do and not by what they say! If you feel you have a moral obligation to be truthful about your past, then go with your heart and instincts love knows no boundaries! Good Luck.
2006-12-07 23:43:28 · answer #4 · answered by Flower 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell no. You tell them 2 things.
1) anything they are going to find out anyways
2) anything that makes you feel guilty about the relationship you're in
People have pasts. Well, the lucky ones do... Anyways, I would say that anything that they don't want to find out from someone else would be fair to address, but they don't need specifics about how many and who and all that. That just sets them up to feel jealous. You shouldn't want to make them feel jealous.
As far as the timing goes. I would disclose ALL information before marriage and not after you're married. That makes the person feel misled which can lead to a lot of things.
2006-12-07 23:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by Red Winged Bandit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is best to be honest with your partner, if you plan on having a long relationship with them. If you are planning on getting married, then yes, tell them anything that might jeapordize that relationship. Especially if it's something that could potentially upset them. Wouldn't you want to know? Better to find out now that you aren't the first (or the second, or third) than to find out after you say I Do. This is why so many marriages end in divorce. My first husband tried to be someone he wasn't and after six months went back to his own self, who I didn't really like. What a waste of both of our times! Be yourself and be truthful.
2006-12-07 23:04:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends.
A person's past experiences is part of what makes them who they are. Married people should want to know who they are going to spend the rest of their lives with. There should be a counting the cost period where each person, knowing everything, can decide if this is THE person for them. Too many times people lie to the one person that requires total intamacy, only to have unresolved issues plague their relationship for years down the road. It is a painful process to reveal one's wounds and battle scars to another, but then there's a chance for healing and acceptance. Get premarital counseling, one on one with a profesional counselor too, if you need.
2006-12-07 23:55:32 · answer #7 · answered by AnswerGuy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No unless the information is something that can affect them. For example, having a child from a previous marriage/relationship, having an std, you have a really bad credit history, having a criminal record, etc. You be the judge but also be fair to him/her.
2006-12-10 04:22:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
for a small piece of adivce if u see the answer it is very evident that girls hide everything related to her past .. if ur a girl i tell u it hurt man very badly when he comes to know abt ur past from another person
and if ur a guy ... the writing is clear on wall that it don't trust ur wife on her past life .. she will lie abt it 100 % ... she might be having a exp with some N number of guys but the words will be ur the first .. to tell with this nonsense ..
2006-12-08 00:19:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my friend had intimate relationships with many guys, she is beautiful but a big flirt and adventurous girl, tried almost everything, now she is getting married what all she tell her husband that she had a intimate affair with only one guy, with whom everything break off a year before. that"s it, she dont entertain any question in this regard and reply to his husband that she dont wanna talk about past, not even think about it. all those things doesn"t matter to him now.As per she told me, she is going on smooth with her husband. (I am a counselling psychologist)
2006-12-08 21:53:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no not at all, this world have people who r very selfish otherwise we all would have attaines moksha , what is past is past , gone and finished , leave i today only
never tell ur life partner anything we shall harass u
2006-12-08 15:25:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋