My husband was at work I went to town and when picking up dinner he saw me there so he said and stopped to let me know that he was on his way home. Previous to him telling me that a co worker had followed him into the parking lot raced out of her car and grabed him by the shirt collar inches from his face. Before I could ask her what she was doing He started telling her what are you doing get your hand off of me "my wife is right over there" she left and he started explaining to me what he was doing there. He said he didn't understand why she grabbed him and was telling me how crazy and slutty of a person she was. Then he started to kiss me and tell me how much he loved me. I didn't really know how to react so I went home and later we argued about it. This girl had come to our house I told him that he was going to have her go through his boss instead of doing business at our house. She is still coming over. Is he cheating? what should I do?
2006-12-07 15:43:51 · 21 answers · asked by momtilludrop 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would get to the bottom of this situation...like yesterday.
Don't believe him if he says she's just a friend,don't let him get away with the age old "Your crazy" bit either. He should cut off all contact with her. tell him stop it even if he says nothing is going on he is probably lying. If u want to keep your husband you better do something fast. Unfortunatley there are 2 many bit**** out there who don't give a damn about breaking up a family.
2006-12-07 15:54:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure as h*ll sounds like it. "Honey this crazy woman jumped out of the bushes and started kissing me! For no reason!!!" Yeah that happens ALL the time in what f*cking ever fantasy land he thinks you live in.
If he is cheating, check three things:
[1] cell phone records. Order a copy of the last 6 months worth of records. Have them held at a Verizon or whatever office so you can go in and pick them up or have them faxed to you so he can't intercept. (The fact that he would want to intercept them means he is guilty of something.)
[2] Credit card bills. He is spending money on her if he is seeing her on the side. You can't get too far away from money and a phone.
[3] Car mileage odometer. If work is 15 miles away, that's 30 miles one day, 150 miles a week. Add in errands and you've got 250 tops. If his mileage is 450 or 500 or 600, he's driving to her place and back or taking her places, or meeting her somewhere aways away from you.
He can't do much without money, a phone, and a car so check those. If he has gone to the trouble of getting a 2nd phone, a second credit card sent to a PO Box you know nothing about, then all that is damning evidence.
Tell him the 'guerrila kissing" bullsh*t doesn't work and all h*ll is going to break loose anyway so why not just admit to the affair and we'll go from there? Oh and by the way turn on your cell phone and let's put it on speakerphone and call back the last 25 numbers you have called and see what's in your in and out boxes on your text messaging windows, just for fun while you are sitting here denying the affair.
Sorry to be so cold about how to get info but you deserve to know.
The three worst parts of cheating are the betrayal of trust, having someone else make decisions for you without informing you (oh, honey, i'll be late tonight - i am going to f*ck this broad from the office then come home and french you with the same tongue. wait up for me, okay?"), and you having to share someone else's sexual history and partners, again without your permission.
what a sh*tty deal. sorry.
2006-12-08 00:16:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be careful.
If he is cheating and you know about it, what would you do? Would you leave him? Most women would stay as long as he promised to never do it again. Usually that means he promises to never get caught again!
Then there is the fact that if he is cheating on you with a co-worker then I guarantee everyone at work already knows it. Could make for an uncomfortable office holiday party.
Before you find out for sure that he is cheating you need to ask yourself seriously what are you going to do about it? Stay? Couples counselling? Divorce?
Have a plan before you go any further.
2006-12-07 23:52:51 · answer #3 · answered by Crazy Old Woman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He may be telling you the truth. Only you know his character. I've been through a cheating relationship so I'll answer that part of your question. The part I'd do over again is that I wouldn't just pretend it never happened and never get him to talk to me about it. Ten years later, he died, and we had never resolved it. He's been gone six years, and it still haunts me. Not that he did it, but that we never settled it between us. It was almost a living wall between us for the rest of his life. Don't do that to your marriage. Talk about it (not FIGHT - TALK). Get counselling if you have to, whatever it takes, but put it to rest one way or another. And once it is resolved - let it stay that way. Don't let it fester for years and THEN throw it out in the middle of an argument that has nothing to do with this matter. Fix it before a pimple becomes a boil on the butt of your marriage.
2006-12-07 23:59:01 · answer #4 · answered by nana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I've been in a similar situation and asked him straight up if he was cheating and he looked me directly in my eyes and said NO, that moment I knew something was up. Invest in an inexpensive voice activated recorder, you know a small hand held you can easily hide in his car or office or at home. Make sure it's one with long enough time and battery life, I think mine is 16 hours on two AA batteries. Once you know for sure then you will be able to confront already knowing the truth. I'm sorry but it is very hard to listen to the tapes and you might be very heartbroken I know I was devastated but not knowing will kill ya. Good Luck
2006-12-08 00:08:21 · answer #5 · answered by Octavia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should ask her whats going on with her and your husband. If you do not want this girl to your house she shouldnt be coming no matter what the situation is this is your home not his office and you should feel comfortable with the people that comes over. I would get to the bottom of this situation becaus e there is more to it. What the hell is she putting her hand s on y our husband for? I would ask her and she had better answer with some respect. He may have something going on with her thats the only explanation for her coming up to him like that. I guess this is what she does to her co workers when they leave work and didnt complete their share of the work.
2006-12-08 00:04:42 · answer #6 · answered by <<SEXY MOMMA>> 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
he has been having an affair with this woman, and got caught red handed. so now he is calling her crazy and slutty, when he and this woman had a thing going on, or she would never have followed or grabbed him, he just said that for your benefit, so u would not think the odvious. if she is still coming over i would put an end to that. i would tell her she is no longer welcome in my home. confront him, give him an ultamitium, and make it crystal clear to him that u have boundaries, and if u find out he is still seeing her that it is over. and be prepared to go through with it. be prepared for the worst, and hope for the best.
2006-12-08 20:30:52 · answer #7 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he's cheating. Why do you think that "S-L-U-T" continues to come to your house even after the fact? Your husband is a disrespectful man (and so is she; yet you didn't exchange vows with her...) There must be some kind of "dating" policy on their job that restricts employees to date (see why)? Unless you plan to jeopardize your husband's job, than I would tell the boss that this female is not allowed to play house @ your house with your husband in your face! Whenever something doesn't "feel" right, it usually isn't...
2006-12-08 00:07:38 · answer #8 · answered by motherkc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he's cheating, and you can set them up or get an investigator to verify it if you are going to do anything legal on the matter. They won't stop even if he admitted it to you as long as they have to be around each other at the job, so it's up to you if you want to take chances or get prepared to start a new life for you & your family (if you have one). Men will take as much out of you as you let them knowing what it can lead too (divorce). It's like they are daring when it comes to satisfying their lust.
2006-12-08 00:32:49 · answer #9 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like that may be the case.
I've been down that road with my ex. She started showing signs so I found a program online that tracked keystrokes on our computer. It's called a "keylogger". I found out that she was seeing her exboyfriend (who cheated on her) I gave her a chance and caught her talking to him again. Thats when i divorced her a$$.
Just be prepared. I was crushed for a long time but i'm better off by not loving a cheater.
My advice to you would be NEVER loose control. Don't fight, just walk. It shows class. WHen you fight, he'll justify cheating. Ever hear a guy refer to his ex as a "psycho" Don't be that girl
2006-12-07 23:58:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋