Many people think I'm crazy, but I'm divorcing after 17 years of marriage. I was married to a nice but stale man. Never wanted to work hard, didn't want friends, felt the kids were annoying. All he wanted was to be coddled and have sex daily. He said his mother never gave him affection, and after 13 counselors telling me to love him to maturity, I got sick of it and left. How can people tell a woman to be a mother to help a boy be a man. Since he's nice, only close friends and family saw the truth. He's on all kinds of meds now for depression, and I feel bad, but we need to do something in society to help men not to be this way. My girls wont date, scared they'll get a man like this. They won't even go to church, can't understand how we could go to church 3X/week and the church be OK with a dad who wants to stay home and is obsessed with his wife. My kids were never allowed to sleep in our bed or even be breastfed because of his insecurity. Good riddens!
2006-12-07 14:28:06 · 16 answers · asked by eleven 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You know, I support you. Because to live with someone who irritate and make you feel sick all the time - is killing you and your soul. Loneliness and being alone are not the same things. Sometime being with someone makes you feel even more lonely than really being alone. It feels like they dead a long time ago, just their bodies are still moving, eating and want sex. Anything else isn't interested for them. If he doesn't want change, well it is his huge problem. He has to clean his soul and head.
2006-12-07 15:39:08 · answer #1 · answered by Bella 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow,all I am wondering is why you waited so long! lol. No, honestly, some times people can't see when other people's relationships are falling apart. Your ex-husband had issues long before you met him. These issues should have been addressed before he even got into a relationship with you. I don't believe you haven't done anything any other than what another intelligent woman would do. It is sad that he is depressed, however, it seems to me that he isn't seeking the help he needs to make himself a better MAN..forget husband. Good Luck!
2006-12-07 22:33:13 · answer #2 · answered by Talkstress 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All I can say is YOU GO GIRL! At least your women enough to know when to move on! and your not SLEEPING WITH ANOTHER MARRIED MAN and having an affair because your in a bad relationship! evidently that's what the in thing is to do these days because people are to moronic to LEAVE. You pretty much paid your dues girl. Now it's time to get on with your life.
2006-12-07 22:36:48 · answer #3 · answered by SecretFriend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you were right by leaving, You also have to be happy, If and in this case it doesn't sound like you are happy you need to get out, you are only human, you need to worry about you and your kids, Good luck, Help your girls as much as possible. They have kinda made the right choice by not wanting to date someone like their dad...
2006-12-07 22:38:20 · answer #4 · answered by goin_truck_racin06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you made the right move and but if he is that crazy and that depressed you might want to watch your back things could get violent.
2006-12-07 22:39:58 · answer #5 · answered by sexycat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well im not sure what your question was, but if your looking for support, youve got mine. if youve stuck it out for that long and your not happy, why waste anymore time. he sounds like a nice guy even though he has security issues, maybe you could still be friends, or maybe not if its too much on you. good luck to you and your future
2006-12-07 22:31:18 · answer #6 · answered by kd baby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I have to give you kuddos cuz mine is still a mommas boy and now she is living with us and my life is hell right now cuz he is always taking her side wish i had the guts to leave i guess i keep hoping that things will change and she will get her own place.
2006-12-07 22:34:26 · answer #7 · answered by emotionalyhurtmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A SERIOUS PROBLEM. HOW COULD YOU PUT UP WITH THIS FOR 17 YEARS? IT SEEMS COUNCILING AND MEDS ARE NOT HELPING. SO MAYBE HE WANTS IT THIS WAY. I WOULD HAVE DIVORCED HIM 16 1/2 YEARS AGO. lol
2006-12-07 22:34:26 · answer #8 · answered by bettys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is relying to much on you, I relied on my wife too, I worshiped her, she left me for another man after 18 yrs of marriage, she broke my heart, she was everything to me........I gave my heart to Jesus, I am over her now, I am happy, I worship my God....this is what your husband needs......God bless you
2006-12-07 22:53:46 · answer #9 · answered by Bert 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read Dr. Phils article on "Calling it quits"
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/23
2006-12-07 22:31:17 · answer #10 · answered by me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋