Why do some (not all) women equate being a welfare mom as being independent?

Question

More women today are single, with children, living on welfare with the father out of the picture or in jail now than ever before.

More children from single-parent (welfare) families end up in youth jails, treatment and counselling for behavior issues.

Is this what you call "freedom" for women?

The freedom to ruin your life and that of your child?

What's wrong with traditional families where the husband works and forks over his entire pay to the mother of his children?

Why do so many single mothers get laid in order to get paid and kick the father out of the childs life in order to stay on welfare?

In the 1950's women had it made and had free reign over their husbands pay and were very good at managing family expenses.

Without fathers nowadays you see them spending $$$ on booze cigarettes, tanning salon make-up, **** tattoos etc etc.

Dirty unkept homes ,screaming kids, high stress, children's aid up their ***.

Are young women better or worse off today?

Answer 1

I completely agree. And furthermore, what's wrong with me not even acknowledging my kids as mine? How does that make me a bad person? I'm not gonna give my hard earned money to some ****-soaked baby when I could be giving it to my dealers and hookers. The media makes me out to be the bad guy, I'm not the one who got pregnant, honey. I DIDN'T EVEN WANT YOU TO KEEP THE KID IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Answer 2

Thats an interesting question.
But don't make the mistake of looking at the past through rose tinted spectacles. It wasn't all 'American Pie' happy families. The woman had no choice about a career or an education. During the 1950's many women would hit the bottle and drink liquor at home because they were depressed.

Personally, I would like to have a home and baby and husband who goes to work, but I would like to work too, at least part time, and contribute financially until the child is full time at school.
At least I will have the choice of whether to work and get a nanny or to stay home....I hope I will have the choice anyway.

But its fair to say that women have always had it tough being the primary caregiver and today there are additional pressures expected of women to be seen as successful, this is sometimes known as the 'double burden'.

Anyway, I could go on all day. I'll end it there.

Answer 3

Well, don't we all wish it was still the 1950's?! No, there is nothing wrong with the traditional family, it just doesn't happen for everyone. If u've bn lucky enough to hv that, then b grateful n stop judging n putting down others who hv to do what they hv to do to survive. Not everyone can b a college graduate n make enough money. I guess their "independence" comes from not having to put up with a relationship that is unhappy/unhealthy just to feed n house their kids. The stereotypes u listed here don't apply 100%.

Answer 4

I don’t think they are necessarily equating welfare with independence. I think they may be equating the struggle of poverty and their survival through it with independence. I don’t know of any single mothers who choose to be single. I think often they are left by fathers who don’t want the responsibility of a family, they are single due to a mutual dissolution of a relationship, they are fleeing a negative or abusive relationship, etc. It is also more difficult for a single mother to find a decent relationship and therefore often remain single. So I think that they probably feel that they are surviving and raising children without a man and doing okay, despite the fact that they are in poverty. I agree with the points that you made about the disservice the absence of a father does to the children. Single parent homes are more likely to be impoverished and the children are more likely to do poorly in school and in society. I think the ideal family is a nuclear one, but sometimes people have to play with the cards that life deals them. I was raised by a single mother on welfare, and she came out of poverty and earned two master’s degrees, she is now a child therapist and owns rental properties throughout Houston. None of her children are in poverty or in prison. We are all educated or pursuing an education. I think the problem is more with the attitude of the “welfare mom”. Is she content with the poverty or does she have aspirations to make a life for herself and her children, and is she working towards those goals? My mother did the best that she could, considering her circumstances and she came out of it on top. She, to me is the definition of an “Independent Woman.”

Answer 5

I work in the social services field and I have never heard of such thing as woman on welfare = independent woman...
Well... thanks God I'm not in the US.
Probably this is just another ****** problem...