Does he have any right to moan at me if the house is a bit messy?
I have a part time job from home, and was working all morning, but he got the right hump when he came home for lunch and the house was a bit of a mess.
2006-12-07 05:29:18 · 34 answers · asked by lovethesun 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Cleaning should be a team effort.
2006-12-07 05:31:14 · answer #1 · answered by snowhawk 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Yes he has a right to moan about the house being messy, just like you have a right to ignore him when he starts moaning. Unless he is helping you keep the house clean, don't stress yourself. One child makes a whole lot of mess, so even if you were not working from home, it still takes a great deal of effort to maintain June Cleaver's cleanilness as a man expects. Do a basic housecleaning sweep right before he comes home, if he comes home on his lunch break complaining again, tell him to pack a lunch and eat at work.
2006-12-07 05:38:02 · answer #2 · answered by poisonette 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He still thinks women should do all the housekeeping and pick up after the husband. This was how he was raised, I believe.
But, this is a new century and women have to work so the duties should be shared.
Sit him down, when you both have time, and gently tell him how unhappy you are with the way things are going and you would like to talk about positive changes you both could make.
Share what bothers you the most.
Then ask him to share what bothers him the most.
Try to come up with something you both can live with and will work for you both.
These are the things that make a marriage become resentful. And resentments can lead to more damage.
This is a good question and one that needs a compromise.
2006-12-07 05:46:04 · answer #3 · answered by Hedicat 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband used to be exactly the same except, with me being me, he was a little more reserved in having a go about it!
But thankfully, that all changed this time last year when we moved to Ireland, I got a great job which I loved and I just didn't give a s**t about the housework (besides, with the hours I work sometimes, I was just too knackered to!)
It's turned out that my husband gets back from work earlier than me so, HE has to collect our daughter, HE makes dinner for ME now and, it's BLISS!
Because he now realises how knackering it is to be the perfect housewife, the place is so much tidier because he now knows, HE'S the one who'll have to clean it up eventually!
It's all good your hubby being houseproud but, if he has no input in maintaining the household, you can tell him where to shove the marigolds!
2006-12-07 07:03:09 · answer #4 · answered by Chanelle B 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he is going to moan about the house not being picked up then you need to tell him to start helping.But other then that most hubbys go to work and dont come home to clean.Its a never ending battle.Just do what you do any other day,go to work ,pick up and start laying down some rules with your daughter.Tough love would help you out with her.Then you will have some help.Most guys dont clean,its not they think its a women job they dont feel like men.Mewn love doing things that makes them feel like men .Stop stressing yourself.Just get that girl to help you out,you should not have to do everything your self.Tell hubby stop moaning and get cleaning if he has anything to say.
2006-12-07 05:35:10 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he's the breadwinner, the least you can do is keep a clean house. If you are equally financing your lifestyle and your daughter's costs then split your chores by all means.
But come on, if he is paying for the majority of things, and works his **** off to take care of you and the kid, least you can do is tidy around the house.
2006-12-07 07:26:52 · answer #6 · answered by hinduhammer8 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, think it´s time to set new rules, you say you work part time, "WRONG", you work full time ,A housewife & mother is a full time job, but you could make it more easier for yourself by setting the rules, Don´t think your husband has done much house work in is day´s , Leave them little letter´s saying what it is you wish them to do . you all live in the same house why should it be that you have to do all the cleaning , plus clean up there mess, no time for change , & don´t worry they will get used to idea.
2006-12-07 05:42:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Put your foot down and tell the people in your home to start respecting you. If they insist on making a mess, then stop cleaning up after them. When they get tired of the mess, then you could get them all involved in cleaning. Good luck to you.
2006-12-07 05:39:37 · answer #8 · answered by loser 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm a firm believer in the old fashioned ways , the man brings home the bacon the woman cooks it and cleans up , it's been that way for thousands of years why change it , the change obviously does'nt work or so many people would'nt be moaning about it .
2006-12-07 05:40:09 · answer #9 · answered by nicemanvery 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
My husband and I had the same problem. Have you told him that this bothers you? I told mine that since we both work outside the home it falls on both our shoulders to keep the house. We divided up duties so it is mostly fair. I still have a little more than him but I figure better than nothing. I hope things work well for you.
2006-12-07 05:50:21 · answer #10 · answered by Jen W 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My husband is the same way, but I have told him that we make a team and if one sees something out of place or a bit dirty don't expect the other to clean it up just do it on your own. It often works, but men are men and will leave their socks on the floor for us to pick up.
2006-12-07 05:32:37 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋