April 2006 my husband's 15 year old daughter had a baby and four months later I had my daughter. Now my husband justifies the situation as an accident and I found out she got pregnant on purpose. I told my husband the horrible news and says it was still a mistake. He treats her like the wife and treats me like the 15 year old and I can't stand her for it. She and her baby get more attention from him than I do. And he expects me to take care of the baby while she is in school and work because I currently stay at home with my 4 month old daughter and two year old son. I was very clear about my feelings and keep open communication with him but he just does not get it. Please, if there is anyone who is in or has ever been in this situation, I NEED HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-07 05:21:10 · 13 answers · asked by kcarter0429 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, you have every right to feel left out and it doesn't matter that you are an adult. You had a child too and you deserve some of your husband's attention and time. What would happen if you left with your two and left him with the 15 yr and her baby. I bet he would wake up and realize then. Continue to talk to him about your feelings. And besides where is the 15 year old's mother and other relatives should be helping out as well. You have your hands full with your own.
2006-12-07 05:42:57 · answer #1 · answered by kitcat 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I do feel sorry for you, but I believe that your husband should treat you guys equally, after all you are his wife and she is his daughter. As for the 15 year old? I understand that you could help her out with taking care of the baby, but where is her mother? it IS the 15 year old's responsibility. She was the one that got pregnant and knew what she was doing. She should take care of it like a mother should. I mean it is her child. She should learn. I think the best bet is that maybe you all sit down together and have a heart to heart talk with the three of you.
2006-12-07 05:28:17 · answer #2 · answered by nothing 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel sorry for you being in this situation, my 16 years old daughter did the same, she got pregnant when she was 15, and i found out she planned, but in my situation, her dad don't want nothing to do with taking care of the new baby (he got married again after we divorce, and his new wife have a 3 years old son and a baby girl the same age than my granddaughter) and my daughter was trying to make pay , and take all the responsibilities for the baby, i understand she planned, and after that they are trying to make their parents pay for it? and be responsible for what they do?, Why? they laid down and open their legs... they have to be responsible for it, i love my daughter and my grand baby , but by now she knows she and her boyfriend planned then i don't have not responsibility on taking care of the baby, ( even if i want to, i work a full time job, and I'm a single mother of three ) i think your husband have to take some counseling, and understand our kids are very important in our life, but if we let them they will take advantage of it.
You have to many responsibilities with your baby's and he have to understand you are not going to unattended yours kids for his daughter "mistakes", she can go and live with her mother or the father of the baby.
2006-12-07 06:20:10 · answer #3 · answered by Betty A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the 15yo and the babys father need to take care of their baby. you take care of your baby, you did not get her pregnant, mistake or not it's her mistake she needs to deal with it. put your foot down, just because you're home doesn't mean you should have to take care of her baby. helping out is fine, but she really needs to be a mother now.... i don't feel sorry for her, if she was woman enough to do the deed with out getting help for that, then she can deal with the repercussions of her actions. you don't get to be a little girl again if you regret doing "it".
wow, so many responses that feel sympathy for the girl!!!!
get a part time job or something, don't ask permission, just do it. taking care of a 2yo, a 4mo, and a 6mo(??) is insane for any woman to do. what kind of woman will this 15yo turn out to be? she can go to school and drop off and pick up her baby at a daycare. maybe you can help with it when she's at work, (cause she needs to pay for daycare, not you)hanging out after school is over she needs to feel the stress she has caused on the house hold. dad needs to grow up and her mom should be the one taking care of her grand child. good luck
2006-12-07 05:38:27 · answer #4 · answered by The Key Master 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a job of your own and put your kids in daycare while your husband and his teenage daughter figure out what to do with the little bastard. Im seriously not trying to be mean here, the child boy or girl birthed into un-planned and out of wedlock is litterally a bastard! Even if you dont need to work for money, use your earnings to pay for your kids child care and pamper yourself so that you can take it easy. You obviously deserve it for staying home and dealing with that kind of crap.
2006-12-07 05:30:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Grow up she may have had a baby but she is a child who made a mistake by getting pregnant you knew he had kids before you married him so live with the situation.
2006-12-07 05:31:19 · answer #6 · answered by simplydelicious 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First i think the reason he is giving her attention is so that she finishes school and all that.. that is his way of supporting her... You are an adult and he feels you can handle all that you have but being so young with a baby takes alot of love and support... maybe you should talk with her and maybe you guess could have a good friendship... No matter how the baby is here it is here and needs love as well.. So suck it up and be a part of thier life.
2006-12-07 05:29:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
i dont understand y a 15 year old would want to get pregnant any way...she laid down and maid the baby...she needs to be the one
taking care of it...not u or grandpa...seems to me like ur hubby is unstable and may need a little counseling to set him straight on the important things in his life...good luck
2006-12-07 05:28:51 · answer #8 · answered by Michele 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've been in your shoes, my boyfriend has a kid from his first marriage and when he gets sick or doesn't have school my boyfriend thinks I should take care of him... I told him to call his ex and have her watch him, I feel they were the ones who created him they need to take responsibility...
2006-12-07 05:33:09 · answer #9 · answered by 21&lovinit 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh no thats tough, why doesnt his daughter go stay with her real mother, so that the real mother can help her take care of the baby, theres also daycare.
2006-12-07 05:26:14 · answer #10 · answered by ~*Jenny*~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋