I am married student that is madly in love with my best friend of 6 years. I love him to death and he feels the same. My day brightens up when im with him compared to when i am with my husband. I actually hate my husband, so what do i do?! Do i love my secret life and be happy and just retern to that man every evening or do i just up and leave my husband and enjoy life to its fullest? Any opinion, quote, anything would help me right now! my mind is running crazy!
2006-12-07 01:25:45 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
dont take me as the wrong person, i have tried couples counseling and he didnt want to go so i attemped alone. not only that but he disrespects meon all levels and so it might be easy to say that i am cheating but this man puts me through hell as often as he can and feels great when he does. He is a fake in front of other but his true self when we are alone!
2006-12-07 01:40:33 · update #1
if you arent happy in your marriage, then what is the point of staying in it? and if you dont love your husband, then let him go and give him a chance to find the happiness he deserves. if i honestly got to the point where i didnt love my husband, i wouldnt keep him locked up in the marriage. thats not fair.
so now that i saw your additional info i can say that if you have honestly tried all you can to make it work and hes just not responding like he should, then you should go with your gut and be with the one you deserve. everyone deserves someone that they can love and respect and be shown the same. your husband should never disrespect you. thats a red light right there.
2006-12-07 01:30:24 · answer #1 · answered by blackqueen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to hear that. tell your mom. you're too young to be is such much dilema. your sister just said your life is easy because she experienced worse than you have but life isnt over yet.stay with her, dont give up on her. rape is a nightmare for every women/girls. she might have a breakdown if no one will support her. if you can get this to the propper authorities so the culprit will be punished the better for your sister. she will feel little relieved knowing that the person did not get away with what he did. you still have a long way to go. your and your sister's life isnt easy at all. if your mother cannot comfort you, you have to comfort each other and find strength from each other. and dont forget to ask the almighty for guidance and peace. god bless you and your family
2016-03-13 04:20:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you hate your husband, but possibly you hate what he exhibits. Your best friend could wind up being just like your current husband, as most women know (or should know) that it's not always lovey-dovey wih men after the initial dating thing. Maybe you should try marriage counseling before you jump to conclusions and run away with this friend of yours. You might just wish you hadn't.
2006-12-07 01:30:19 · answer #3 · answered by jessyl135 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You won't like some of what I have to say. You have a responsibility to do what is right. It doesn't matter that someone else is not doing what is right. You still need to do what is right. Unless your husband is committing adultery or is abusive, you should not divorce him. You have a responsibility to love him as much as you can and act like it. Even when he acts terrible, your acts of love may win him over. There is a bible verse that says to bless those that curse you, for in so doing you will heap coals of fire over his head. He will either respond to your love with love, or he will be tortured by it. Hopefully he has enough sense to respond with love.
Refer to this book:
"Love life for every married couple" by Ed Wheat, M.D. and Gloria Okes Perkins
2006-12-07 11:19:52 · answer #4 · answered by Jack 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, bet it is. how long have you been seeing this other guy. do you have things going on? i feel for you since i exactely know what you're talking about.. my love life was really a roller-coster ride in the past months. i blame it on me. and it was not always a good experience. i did have to make a decision. but yet i still have feelings for this other man. hard to make up your mind. i'm not married though. still i had to think hardly and try to act wiser than before. i told my boyfriend by the way. looong story. but he forgave me. and he won me over completely by this. i adore my boyfriend now much more than before.
i advice not to rush anything. at least you are married and yes have given a vow. so better think before running. why not keep on this double life just as long as you need to make up your mind. maybe this new guy has got secrets himself and you do not know yet. consider wisely before running away. give your husband a chance and imagine the moment when you have to tell him and you see that you are (maybe) doing a biiig mistake. think before acting. but yes.. i completely understand your feelings.. good luck!
2006-12-07 01:34:00 · answer #5 · answered by india18 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are in a position that you can, leave your husband, and enjoy your life to the fullest. If not, you will always feel like you are missing out on something. And eventually, the situation will cause you more problems than you would ever want to deal with at home if you try to keep up both relationships. Good luck.
2006-12-07 01:30:08 · answer #6 · answered by donnabellekc 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave the marriage and go with your true happiness,or you will always regret it for the rest of your life.Dont ever let anything stop you from living your life and your dreams.Its terribly sad other people get hurt in the process,but is it fair for your husband to have a wife also who literally hates him? NO.So I hope what your going for is a good thing.In the long run it will be best for everyone,trust me i have been on both ends of that one too.
2006-12-07 01:36:53 · answer #7 · answered by maryann c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married your husband for better or worse. In my eyes a marriage is never ment to be broken, but things cant always stay perfect and change always occurs. Theres obviously something that you must love about your husband since you did marry him. I suggest you try to go to couples counseling and try and save your marriage, or are you willing to jut throw that away for this lust that you have with your best friend?? You need to make up your mind and not drag your husband along for the ride, thats soo wrong. Be an adult and decide on what you want. For you to say you hate your husband and ask this question is the stupidest thing. If you HATE him, why the hell are you still with him?? You need to grow up.
2006-12-07 01:32:35 · answer #8 · answered by BuNNY 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why do you want to continue hating your husband? He didn't do anything wrong did he? If you're felling this way towards this man--get out the marriage and let your husband live the happy life with someone else that he so deserves to be happy with.
2006-12-07 01:30:02 · answer #9 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the right thing to do is make sure that all feelings are gone for your husband , after all you did say your vowels , if theres nothing there then split and go be with the man you love, but make sure thats what you too really want because sometimes when you leave someone , for these reasons they dont want you anymore, because its not a secret anymore.
2006-12-07 01:30:43 · answer #10 · answered by sissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋