I know im too young but i still want a baby...?

Question

I am only 16...but for the past year and half i have this uncontrolable urge to just get pregant. I want something that is just mine and nobody elses, that will love me no matter what, and that i love no matter what. I know im wayyy to young but i dont know what to do about it. Lately the urge is getting stronger and stronger and frankly its starting to worry me. Can anybody help or give advice?

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who answer to my quesiton. you helped alllllottt! i've thought about it and most of yall were right. i wouldn't be able to handle a baby at my age emotionally, financal wise, But to the people who asked if i got love and attention at home...yes i do. my mom is my best friend, she wont let me have a dog, i have a fish, i have a great job that i love. i dont want to be a bum. i do have dreams that i want to peruse ( i want to be a 2nd grade teacher) and i do want to be married and i realized that it would be extra hard to have love with a baby. So thank you very much to everybody. yall helped me so much!

Answer 1

It's good that you are acknowledging that you are very young.

Simply put, I think the urge you are experiencing is because you are biologically mature. It's nature telling you that your body is ready to have a baby. Now that doesn't mean that you are emotionally, financially, and otherwise mature enough to have a baby. Those are the more important pieces. But you already know that.

Just recognize what you are feeling as the natural biological urge to reproduce. It's normal, and there is nothing wrong with you. I would just recommend finding another outlet to satisfy your urge until you are mature enough in all the other more important ways.

You could volunteer in a children's library. You could become a "big sister". You could babysit more.

Good luck!

Answer 2

lol. I can promise you that that child will not always love you, in fact that child will most of the times treat you like common garbage and make you want to pull your hair out and just give up. Especially once it is a teenager.

You'll always love that baby, but there will be times when you will hate the very thought of having to parent the person it is. Theyre only babies for a year, after that, theyre little adults in the making.

If you want children, be smart, take that desire seriously.

You can do something about it without making a baby right now. Babies need money, they need good parenting, and they need a solid family life.

I wanted nothing more than to get married and raise a family, so I worked my can off to become the best, most knowledgable, best equipped mother and wife I could possibly be.

I finished school early, at 16, I started working in a few different careers, such as the nannying, and real estate, I spent my time looking in good places for a good suitable person to settle down with, and then I worked on making a baby.

It took me 4 years to find a good husband, and 2 more to finally reach a point where i was certain I was ready for that baby I had dreamed of every night since I was a child.

You need to first prepare yourself by realizing you not only dont know everything, you dont know ANYTHING. its impossible to know much at 23, let alone at 16.

To get yourself through, start volunteering to work with babies. I promise, after you spend a few weeks as the full time caregiver for a new born or infant, or toddler, you WILL be glad you waited a little while longer.

Answer 3

I would like to give you advice since my daughter is sixteen and went through a similiar experience. She met a boy and thought she wanted a baby. Because we would not let her marry this boy she thought she would try to force my hand. She was trying to get pregnant. Thank god it did not happen. Unfortunately the courts had to intervene because she got in to pot and drinking and started running away to be with this boy. She ended up in DSS custody. Which is not a pretty place to be. She had a hole summer to think things over because once the courts intervene there is no turning back. Tough love. Any how when she came home she was so different, as well as while she was in custody I gave birth to a baby girl, I also have a three year old. Anyway she sees how much work kids are and has decided she can wait and will. Kids are a lot of work, you cant just shut them off. If one is not crying the other one is. I have endless sleepless nights and if they get sick it is even worse. Plus they are alot to support. Sometimes money is extremely tight. Honey, take my advice finish school get your education. Get married and then have kids. Trust me it will be worth the wait. Another thing you cant just go out anytime you want when you have kids and babysitters are expensive. Your need for love concerns me. It tells me you are not getting it somewhere else. If I could I would give you a big hug, because everyone needs to feel loved. Try to talk to your mom but if unable, try to talk to anyone you trust. If you need any further advice e-mail me at [e-mail]. Good luck.

Answer 4

i think that a lot of girls go through this stage, i did when i was 16 too. i am now 21 and i just had my first baby 4 months ago, and i promise that it is worth the wait. just quit thinking about it. it seems to becoming a trend among high school girls to get pregnant. i just learned that there are 50 pregnant girls at my old high school. when i was there, there were only like 5 pregnant girls. Don't get pregnant.

what can you provide for a child right now? probably not much. you wouldn't be able to provide for it financially. you would have to get a babysitter so you could go to school. if you have to quit school what kind of job are you going to get nowadays without an education?

Do you see what i am getting at? i hope so. wait until you have a great husband that has a good job and can take take care of you and a child so you can afford to be a stay-at-home mom and give your child the love and affection that it needs and deserves.

you have so much to learn about raising children. when i was 16 i thought i would have been able to be a good parent, but i know now that i couldn't have. i learned so much about children and their needs and development in my college classes.

plus the older you are the more patience you have, and if you have kids you have to have a lot of patience. and you can't be self-centered as most teenagers are. as you get older you learn that the world doesn't revolve around you.

if i have persueded you to hold off on having kids then i have done my job.

Answer 5

There is no one that can tell you exactly what it's like to be a mom. But I will say I'm 26, married, college educated, financially secure, and it's still REALLY hard. Having a baby is isolating, tiring, frustrating, and demanding. When my son was born he only slept for about 3 hours a night, his stomach wasn't developed enough so he projectile vomited after every meal (which is about every 3 hours), he cried for hours on end because his stomach hurt (and there wasn't much at all I could do about it). I spent three months pretty much in my pajamas, covered in vomit, and crying with the baby. He is 6 months old now and has outgrown his stomach problem, but he still doesn't sleep much. My husband and I don't get to go out, and we really don't get nearly as much time together either. We are Ian's parents so our love for our child outweighs all the work and worry, but for a 16 year old it would wreck your life. Babies aren't always cute, cuddly, and sweet smelling. They leak out of every orifice. They cry and you won't know why or what to do. They are very expensive. If you have a baby...do it when it's the right time in your life. If you have a baby now, you will not only be ruining your life, but also your babies. 16 year olds aren't equipped to give a baby everything it needs. My suggestion is to baby sit or spend some time with your younger relatives if you want to be around a baby. Right now is your time to enjoy being you. When you have a baby there is no more you.

Answer 6

It would not be fair to you or to a baby to have one at your age, please do not do this. You can not support a baby financially or emotionally. There is more than just having someone to love or to love you.You are talking about a life here, that no 16 years old
is able to provide what that life needs.
Channel your energy in a more positive direction. Volunteer to work in hospital, visit nursing homes, or get a part time job. Most of all, do well in school, you will need it, when you are old enough to have the child you desire, but do not cheat the child by having it when you know you are too young.

Answer 7

My advice is to love yourself no matter what, realize that you are unique and there is no one else like you, you add something to this world that no one else can, then, find a hobby that you enjoy doing that makes you feel good about yourself, volunteer to help younger children at your school with homework or something like that, set positive goals for yourself, academic or personal, and then follow through, do what you have to do to make them happen. You are sixteen, you are transitioning into a woman and your emotions are probably all over the place but the last thing you want to do is get pregnant, maybe you should talk to a teenager who has had a baby so you can realize how hard it is, especially when you have no education, no income and no help. Right now you should be more concerned with finishing highschool and going to college and maybe one day when you are ready you will be able to give a child what they need, until then be smart.

Answer 8

Just think if you had a baby today, the odds of you & the father staying together are slim to none. So you have to share the baby w/ a person who may not take care of the child well, you will not be able to provide it with all the fun thing in life let alone necesities. Wait until you are older & married when you can enjoy having a baby & spoling them too. I am a stay at home mom that could not imagine not seeing everything new my children do, so think before you act. Give yourself & your future children a better chance at life than the one you would be able to provide now

Answer 9

I know exactly where ur coming from i used to feel the same way when i was younger i am 22 and just had my 1st child a yr ago by the way named jaymee too but anyway just wait i waited and im glad i did because even now i still need all the help i can get your still in school and having a baby is not going to leave u time for anything else enjoy ur childhood a little longer trust me itll be worth the wait!!!

Answer 10

You are way too young. I got pregnant at 17 and you cant go out with your freinds you have to find a babysitter and pay them if you want to work(unless your rich) you have to pay for daycare which even if you can get subsidized you still pay alot. Theres so many things I wish I would have done b4 having a baby, i'm now 24 and when I got pregnant none of my friends had kids so everyone just drifted away and not to mention the father not doing jack!!!My advice to you is get a dog or cat and take care of that. And if you still feel the urge talk to people even a professional. you have your whole life to have a baby ----WAIT