my husband loves his daughter but finds it hard to spend 'quality time' with her, she and i get on great but sometimes i wonder if it just because i spend that extra bit of time with her that she likes me so much. her 'parents' dont get on so am i the piggy in the middle?
2006-12-06 11:58:23 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Men do not always manage the children thing, no matter how much they love them, especially 6 year olds.
2006-12-10 05:59:51 · answer #1 · answered by Amanda K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! That is a good one. I just got married in September and i have a 4yr old little girl and my husband has no children. I was really scared on how she and he would act around each other. It was really tough due to it was just her and i for the first 2 yrs. But when it was just the two of them they where great. (really took some time). They best thing i could tell you is to talk to your husband and see what his answere is. Or you could do like we do and have family time and family outtings. We dont do anything unless we are a family. On our days off witch is on the weekends we will set down and figure out what we want to do as a family and just do it. There is alot of times my daughter just wants to go to the park or go take a walk in the woods or just simple things like that. But i do think that it needs to be a family thing! Not just you and the child but all 3 of you!!! And then as for he and the xwife.... Well that is there problem that they dont get along but they have to REMEMBER that there is a CHILD in the middle of all of this and she is the one who is hurting and the one who they are hurting in the long run!!!!!!
I should know. My daughter has only seen her father 4 times and she will be 5 on Dec 28th. That is by his choice not mine!
I talk to her fathers wife all the time and she wants to meet my daughter but i feel that if her father wanted to see her he could contact us!
So talk to your husband and if he is a good father then he would want to spend some time with his daughter and he will listen to your concerns.
2006-12-06 12:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by nickole30 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, we no longer live in an age where everything that we do is innocent anymore. You might see it as innocent and maybe you family. But we live in the age where everything is scrutinize, if the child goes to school or tells a friend "I take baths with my grandma". You can expect a call or person from Children Services! Then expect that they will be in your life and hers for a long time supervision goes a long way. And they won't ask why you couldn't stop her/them. They will only think of the welfare on the child and supervision of the child and child endangerment. Also they may even take your daughter...Here's a thought maybe she no longer needs to stay at grandma's. Or bathe her before she goes to MIL. And if they can't obey the rules they can come to your house to see their grandchild....
2016-05-23 02:14:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He just doesn't know how to act around her, he probably feels that things have changed between them since things have changed between him and her mother, some men just aren't good when it comes to things like this.
Talk to him and tell him to just act normal, and not to expect too much of her as she probably still has to adjust to her parents living apart, she is only 6 after all.
You aren't piggy in the middle it's more than likely that your maternal instincts are kicking in like it does for most of us women, if your husband spent as much time with his daughter as you do this problem probably wouldn't be a concern at all.
2006-12-06 15:01:41 · answer #4 · answered by debs1701 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not knowing him it`s hard to know why he`s like this .you don`t say if you two have children together and how he is with them if you have .Some men are lazy and can`t be bothered to spend time with their children even when the family are still together .Others don`t really seam to know how to be around young children and are better with them when they are older ,a lot of men spend more time with sons anyway ,they find it easier to relate ( with manly things ,sport ,motor bikes ,fighting etc) and feel awkward with little girls .Or it could just be the way they were when they lived together and his ex always looked after the child
anyway it shows your a good person to care ,keep up the good work : )
2006-12-06 20:46:48 · answer #5 · answered by keny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe there still bitter
When parents have other stuff going on, they can't see the wood for the tree's,do you feel able to point this stuff out?
Have a meeting with them both and see what you can do, for the child.
You sound like a lovely person, and someone ,I hope,god-forbid, anything happened in my Marriage,would be brought into in my family unit.
I wish you all the best.
2006-12-06 12:22:31 · answer #6 · answered by live life 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it all sounds like everythings being done for the sake of it and you are there conveniently while the daughter is there. she is lucky that she has a nice step mother, and you are helping to cushion any blows caused by the parents falling out.
dont worry though, this issue will follow through soon and everyone will become more comfortable with their situations.
2006-12-06 12:08:58 · answer #7 · answered by ♫ ♥green heather butterfly♥ ♫ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Good on you, for taking the time to give her your attention, maybe, if you and your husband took the little girl out somewhere special for the day, that might make a difference
2006-12-06 12:18:54 · answer #8 · answered by Sierra One 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Awww sounds like a toughy feel sorry for the poor child. Try talking to your husband about it he may not even realise he is doing it.
2006-12-06 12:18:45 · answer #9 · answered by Yaz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I 'll tell you from experience that your husband is just immature and doesn't want anyone or anything to take away from his own time. He is selfish and probably is using you as a babysitter.
2006-12-06 12:44:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋