My husband is 20 years old and trys to controlles my life and gets close to hitting me... I have left him, but he keeps following me!
2006-12-06 09:47:42 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Contact the police. It's not like the movies. He doesn't know everybody. And in our overly-feminized society, someone might just beat him on suspicion!
2006-12-06 09:49:38 · answer #1 · answered by epicsizepenis 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my daughter went back many times to an abuser, both mentally and physically. finally one day she woke up and filed for divorce, and now has a different life. he won't change his way's, it will be this way, haven't u had quite enough of this inn the 20 years you have been with him? he could hit you or do worse. get a restraining order, get some of the money from the account, and file for divorce. be prepared first, make your plans to leave. life is way too short to live like this.
2006-12-06 10:20:54 · answer #2 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have a restraining order, get one. It can't stop him, but it can put him on notice, and you can have him arrested if he doesn't abide by it.
Your husband is neurotically insecure (meaning jealous) and that is why he is controlling. By controlling you he thinks he is protecting himself from getting hurt. Insecure people protect themselves by bullying others since it is the easiest way to control people. Fear is a great motivator. Basically, you can hurt him emotionally if you don't have the chance to because you are scared of him.
You need to get him legally away from you and he needs to get over himself. He needs counseling. But I'm doubtful he'd go.
2006-12-06 11:07:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
--Keep a log of his behavior and your response:
Example--12/22/06--He came by to say ___ I asked him to leave, he refused, forced his way into my house and began yelling, threatening me, etc.
--Get a restraining order.based on your oral statements and logs.
--Consider moving away with no info. except family on where you went.
--Contact your local battered women's shelter regarding support groups for women who has been harrassed and/or emotionally and socially abused.
--Be sure to tell family and friends of his behavior so they can provide support and legal evidence of your being harrassed, particularly if they are first hand witnesses to incidents between him and you.
--Aslk the women's shelter or support group as well as friends and family, to help you develop a plan if you feel an immediate need to get away, seek safety/shelter away from your home, need access to money, the whole 9 yards.
--Take self-defense classes or martial arts to defend yourself physically on the spot if need be--and don't be polite about it either. Don't be afraid to hit back and f*** him up if he lays a hand on you.
Just always be sure that your actions are in self-defense--you can't hit him in the back if he's running away from you bc you're out of immediate danger from him; you can't give him 500 karate chops when he's down and when 3 or 4 were enough to disable him and keep him from being an immediate and continuing threat to you during that particu;ar altercation.
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Good luck.
2006-12-06 11:17:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
And so what is your question. What would I do if I had a husband I was afraid of??
First, move out. Second get a restraining order. Well, no, first be sure I wasn't pregnant, and if I were get a saline abortion...... You married an infantile control freak hon. leave.
2006-12-06 09:54:41 · answer #5 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the police, get the restraining order, change your phone #, move, file for divorce. Talk to a friend or a relative you trust, they might be able to help and protect you. Good luck.
2006-12-06 09:55:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has hit you you need proof by reporting this ......He will continue till he hurts you so leave this person and stay with someone you can trust...... a restraining order is my next thing to do this will keep him away ......this is serious get help Bless you kara
2006-12-06 09:52:34 · answer #7 · answered by COOKIE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out of this relationship. People do not change. He is a control freak. Do not have children with this man.
2006-12-06 09:54:37 · answer #8 · answered by patti r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart get out of there and don't look back.What is it gonna take ?Does he HAVE to hit you to realize he is abusive? Save some money and leave .Try to remain sane .
2006-12-06 09:59:44 · answer #9 · answered by IT'S JUST ME ! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a restraining order...call the police if he attempts to get violent with you or if he violates the restraining order after you get it...
Sounds like he needs counseling...hopefully someone will be able to help him see that...
2006-12-06 09:51:01 · answer #10 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋