How do you stop feeling like this?

Question

I lost my pregnancy by miscarriage in October. Everytime see a pregnant woman I feel so terrible inside, like it will never happen for me again. My next door neighbor is pregnant right where I should be- same due date I would have had, and it's hard for me to talk to her without wanting to cry. Somehow I manage to be tough and friendly though. Oh, plus...my son (6) told her about my baby that is "not in my tummy anymore" (you know how kids are) but she STILL rambles on and on about her pregnancy to me when I see her. I don't get it, she says she has lost two babies herself.

I really feel so sad and sometimes, I just want to scream and ask God why, but I know that will do no good. Things happen. Ijust want to know if anyone else out there has these feelings and what do you do to make them subside? It hurts so bad, especially around the Holidays.

Answer 1

I miscarried in September. Days can go by and I think I'm fine, and then I'll see something on TV or see someone at the store with a newborn, and I remember and then get very sad again. Just give yourself time. And try not to let your neighbor bother you too much. She's being somewhat insensitive, but some people just don't read other people very well.

Answer 2

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I don't think other people mean to be so hurtful. They are just so happy about their own pregnancy, they forget about other people's misery. I've been ttc for 4 years. In that time, my co-worker, and very close friend went through her first pregnancy, and now a second. Both were "ooops." I have an 11 year old, and had one miscarriage, so being the only person at work that had gone through a pregnancy, I was the only one she had to ask all the question to. The day after she announce, I got the call from my doctor that my husband had a problem and our chances were slim to none. I was crushed, and angry, and a mix of emotions. But I still had to be there for my friend. I took it one day at a time, sometimes a minute at a time. And those moments that I couldn't take it, I excused myself and went and cried. I let her know when I needed a moment, and she understood, because sometimes, I had to be sad for myself, and that's okay.
Only time will heal your pain. As far as how to make the feeling subside, you don't. Take the time to greive. Allow yourself to be sad for a while.

Answer 3

It's hard to be happy for someone else, when you've just suffered a loss. I lost a child 12 years ago in November and was 24 weeks along. I still think about the son I never got to know, but somehow I realized that maybe the baby wasn't healthy enough to continue or that it just wasn't meant to be. That still doesn't dull the pain. I have 2 healthy girls now, so I know this will happen for you it is just a matter of time. Give yourself time to grieve and heal, it will increase your chances of being able to carry your next conception to full term

Thoughts and prayers are with you.

Answer 4

I am so sorry. Only time can heal this. I do know because my husband and I tried for 5 years and had 3 losses. My sister in law was prego when I lost the last one and that was so hard. I just keept telling myself that god decided it was not time. Also maybe go into some sort of councling or talk to your Dr. you can still have post pardom.
This is a hard time but it should pass.