We have been Married almost a year and things have been weird she has like this wall that i can not penitrait and only time she can express how much or how she loves me is when shes Drunk.... I'm at a loss i see my hand more times in a month then i see between her thighs and I'm starting to get really frustraited i moved 4000 miles away from home to be with her and now i still get nothing what am i to do?
2006-12-06 07:54:05 · 17 answers · asked by complicatedsincebirth 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well i am and she is 24 and we have two kids and i moved out of country i moved from texas to Germany if that helps anything
2006-12-07 05:42:38 · update #1
Move back home for awhile. Perhaps she'll begin to realize what she has in you..........if you arent around.
2006-12-06 07:57:00 · answer #1 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does your wife work outside the home or is she alone and feels that she has lost herself when you got married? If she gets drunk a lot that is an indication that she is depressed and alcohol will only make it worse. Have you taken her out to a quiet restaurant and started flirting with her? Go slow and treat her like you would a new date. Let her know that you desire her as a woman not as your wife. Send her an invitation by mail, buy her a new dress, pick her up as you would for a date, take her out, flirt, talk about nice things, not your problems, leave them behind for a while, kiss her hands, her neck, give her room to fall for you again and lets see if she is the one that wants you in bed that night!
2006-12-06 08:06:06 · answer #2 · answered by lot2talkabt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long did you "date" before you got married? Seems like you got into a marriage with someone you don't really know. Can't deduce much from the limited info, but sounds to me like you married someone with a drinking problem. Also I get the feeling that you're young... if that's the case, get out while you can. Try to work it out, but if she's not going to talk, all you can do is give her an ultimatum. "Tell me what the problem is or I'm outta here" and have the balls to follow through. Then get all lovey-dovey, get her drunk, put a condom on and nail her one last time before you load your stuff up and leave.
2006-12-06 08:04:24 · answer #3 · answered by Danny T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man, At least she hasnt left.. When she's drunk atleast she isnt telling you that she wisdhes she never married you.. give it time. The 1st 2yrs of your marriage are the toughest. Women are like teachers they like to test you all the time.. Ive been married for 2yrs and my wife stopped wanting to have sex ater the 1st yr. But when we do.. boy do we!!!!!!! its not all about the sex to the women. It becomes everything else, attention, give them what they need. They are women.. very very different from men.. stop rubbing one out. cause she'll just keep letting you do it.. if you dont, lay in bed and talk with her and read to her.. Im telling you if you do the sex will get better. remember your being tested.. dont fail..
2006-12-06 08:24:53 · answer #4 · answered by money_maker 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her drinking and get her talking. You should be able to dig pretty deep when she's had a few. Then, you can find out her problem.
I'm going to guess that she's had her heart broken before and hasn't recovered. The only way she can fix what is wrong is that you have to allow her to be able to say ANYTHING without you judging her or getting upset. It will be VERY hard for you to do that but your gains will be great.
Good luck
Also, is there a mutual friend that you can talk "thru" to get info?
2006-12-06 08:04:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a life for yourself. No, I'm not talking about dating other people. Make a place for yourself among friends. Don't just take on her friends, but meet new people that make you feel good about yourself. I wouldn't tell everyone I met about this isolation you feel since this could make you look like a troubled person and scare them away. You did move in on her turf (even though she asked you to) so you don't have your network of support there. By making a life for yourself, she will stand up and take notice by seeing you again through their eyes.
2006-12-06 08:17:43 · answer #6 · answered by Lindy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok first off you need to curb her drinking habit,
Second you need to get involved in more spiritual activites,
Reason being , she has some emotional, or intimacy issues.
And they are probably due to abuse of some sort,
Counseling is a good thing, but you can get free couseling in Church groups,
I am a Bahai and they have great programs if there is a Large community in your area,
Let me know if you'd like to contact them.
And as far as sex goes, you could try the works,
Candles, music, flowers,, strawberries, you know you need to make sure she orgasms aswell, and if your not,
Well going down on her, then she isn't orgasming, and you need to rectify that. either that or she needs to masturbate during it.
there are plenty of opinters on the web, or i'd be happy to tell you the mechanics of it, if you need me to.
Good luck
MEg
2006-12-06 08:13:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk talk talk.
If drunk is the only time she talks, talk to her drunk! Instead of having sex with her, talk to her. There are people who's guard is up so high that only alcohol can get them by.
Find out....soon...
2006-12-06 07:58:42 · answer #8 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave now before you get in deeper. Consider this a life lesson.
2006-12-06 07:58:59 · answer #9 · answered by onlineseeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something is going on...you need to seriously talk to your wife and tell her how you are feeling. What has changed in her life that she has closed herself off?
Good Luck to you!
2006-12-06 08:09:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋