Serious Cow question?

Question

Hi all, wonder if you can answer this query:.....

Was wondering exactly how far you can push your arm up a cows backside, ( like vets do) and what exactly can you feel when your inside . Would there be anything to hold onto should it decide to run around the field...Thanks

Answer 1

wow you are lonelier than I thought.........

Im sorry dude.............there are plenty of fish in the sea....oh right you are into ruminants......silly me!

Answer 2

Umm... Mark Leshark? I think it's cow poop, not bull. He's talking of a cow. I seriously don't think you can hang on to cow poop if it runs around the field. It won't keep it still.

Just a question for you Pop C. Why would you want to stick your arm up a cow's backside? If you're not trained, I don't think you should do it. Hire a vet instead... Well, that's if there's a serious reason why you want to do this. Otherwise, if you're just doing it for your own excitement... well, then the vet won't adhere to it.

Answer 3

Ha. Great question. I 've got some experience with this, but perhaps not exactly what you are looking for. I suspect you are wondering about the bovine "cow". I work with elephants and a female elephant is also refered to as a "cow." Because elephants are so thick it is impossible to do an ultrasound of their reproductive tract through their body wall. Therefore you must do it rectally. An enema is first required. We wear shoulder length gloves and a rain suit, lube up, and clean out the tract. Once you're in there it just feels warm and squashy. Elephants, being rather large, we go in as far as possible - to the shoulder. I suspect with a cow you can probably get at least half your arm up if not all the way. There's nothing to hold on to in there at least not without doing some serious internal damage. But it the cow takes off running, I'd grab something with my other arm to anchor myself. If she tense up her anal sphinter around your arm, she'll probably drag you off!

Answer 4

With some cows you can go past the elbow in the @$$. You can only get up to the forearm if you are penetrating the vagina. Speaking from experience, never try this with a cow that is in an open field. Once they get running, you won't be able to pull your arm out no matter how bad they kick or fight. Best thing to do if you are caught in the open field is wait for the cow to stop and relax. You may want to try buying the cow dinner first to relax it.

Answer 5

Well, first of all, when they have to do that procedure, they tie the cow to a stake or fence post. They feel the rectum, intestin, whatever. Along with the dung. And usually, a grown man can fit his entire arm in a cows but.

Answer 6

SERIOUS ANSWER!!!

you can put your arm in almost all the way in a full grown cow.
you don't actually put it up its backside, it's the birthing canal.

and no there is nothing to hold on to so don't try it in an open field!!

Answer 7

unless you have a seriously long arm, it will go to bout 1/2 way up ur upper arm, and what you feel it depends on what ur trying to do . . u might be trying to turn a calf round so the birth is easier or if it's for fun well who knows i aint ever done that, oh and don't believe the bollox about the soap bit either, u normally aint got time to get any

Answer 8

Whatever you feel is too squishy to hold on to. Why do you have this strange urge ? There are a lot of good "shrinks" around who might be able to help you, if it hasn't go too far.

Answer 9

all the way to your arm pitts you could feel all the fresh manure and it aint fun

Answer 10

well I can only say you made me laugh for the first time today like to say thank you god bless you

Answer 11

You go ahead and try it. I'll film it and we can sell it for a mint!!! that would be a friggin riot!!!!!