Whenever I visit my mom in California (once a month) with my boyfriend he just drops me off at her house because he knows my mom hates him. (He is very courteous, polite, etc.). I stay there for maybe two or three days, but they are the most horrifying days of my life. My mom bad mouths my boyfriend and I do stick up for him, but she talks about him constantly and acts like she doesn't care. She is Vietnamese and my boyfriend is Filipino. She also doesn't like many Filipinos. She tells me he is lazy, fat, unmotivated, and ugly. When he picks me up to go home to Vegas, we end up fighting. I take everything she says about him personally because I love him a lot. She doesn't want me to marry him either. She also bad mouths my sister's boyfriend who is Vietnamese/Spanish. I can accept the fact that she has her own views, but I cannot accept the fact that she is insulting the one I love. I am wondering if I should visit her less or give her an ultimatum?
2006-12-06 05:21:53 · 2 answers · asked by Noneyabusiness 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sounds to me like you are being a doormat. Why would you continue to visit her when she makes things so unpleasant? Next time you're invited to vist, why not say, "Gee, mom, thanks but no thanks. Last time I visited, I didn't enjoy all the criticism you had for Joe, so I'd rather not listen to it this time. I'll come visit when you decide not to criticize."
2006-12-06 10:26:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I met my husband, my mom didn't like him. She didn't even want me to marry him. I guess she was just being over protective of me. My mom loves him now because he proved her wrong. Tell your boyfriend to do the same. A bad look he should return with a good one. Tell him not to get discouraged. Besides he is with you not her.
2006-12-06 05:25:32 · answer #2 · answered by dudettejj 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋