I have spoken to her, but she doesn't not understand what i mean. She cannot forgive and forget and always feels sad about bad things which happened before. how do I find a way to show her to move on.
2006-12-06 05:15:49 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Its easier said then done. It takes alot of courage and strength to never look back. Something like this takes alot of time and process to move on. It does not mean it cant be achieved, it just means she needs to make the effort.
I know this from experience. I have alot of emotional baggage, and it affects me emotionally, phsically, and especially mentally. There are weeks that im healthy, and there are times a break down and have flash backs. Little by little, step by step i will get to where i need to be. What your friends needs is someone to support her and lead her to where she needs to be. She can get through it. But you have to understand its not going to happen over night.
Tell her this.
The past is for refernce, the present is to plan, the future is to achieve.
2006-12-06 05:39:44 · answer #1 · answered by Bambi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to explain to her that carrying that baggage gives power to the people that hurt her. By constantly focusing on the bad things, she'll never be able to enjoy the good things that come her way.
The next time she starts dwelling on something from the past, ask her, "Why are you still letting that person hurt you?"
If that doesn't help, talk it out with her, and look for the positive side. For example, if an old boyfriend cheated, tell her it was better to find out before they got married or before he gave her a disease.
People who keep carrying emotional baggage have short lives. Stress really does take years off of your life. Unfortunately, only she can stop it.
.
2006-12-06 13:17:17 · answer #2 · answered by FozzieBear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By being an example in living your life without emotional baggage weighing you and being a general suport for her. Don't try to help too much because you could end up resenting her for not following your advice and she could resent you for trying to get her to do something she isn't willing or ready to do.
You can't help someone that does not want to help themselves. She has to acknowledge that this is a problem for her, if she doesn't feel that it is then she's not likely to find a reason to stop such thinking.
Ultimately, she has to make the decision not to let it weigh her down; once she does she'll be able to move on and find happiness. Good luck to you and your friend!
2006-12-06 14:12:45 · answer #3 · answered by Tempest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first answer that was submitted is where I stand.
On the other hand, you can take her out for a couple drinks, get her drunk, and say it loud and clear. Sometimes that works, if it doesn't, well at least she had fun!
2006-12-06 13:26:28 · answer #4 · answered by DREAMY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say to her:
"no matter what happens..life must go on!"
2006-12-08 03:54:46 · answer #5 · answered by raiN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think she does that voluntary?
2006-12-06 21:08:36 · answer #6 · answered by Willem V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't worry
be happy
2006-12-06 20:02:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋