Hi,
I am a hispanic female in my late 20s. My coworker is african american and she invited me to her church. I finally went one SUnday by myself. I never expected the following. I was totally IGNORED! Is a big church and is mainly like 95% Black. WHen i went inside the church they had greeters, and they greeted the people in front of me, but as soon as they saw me, it was like I wasn't even there. I felt totally out of place, because they even had greeters once you sit down, and they didn't even try to shake my hand. There was just one older man that sat next to me that greeted me. My coworker adores her church and she always tells me her church is about making everyone feel at home, but I felt totally rejected. She invites me over and over, but I always tell her I can't go. was this racism?? or just plain rude?
2006-12-06 04:51:40 · 15 answers · asked by A_Latina 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
I suspect it was the latter, probably due to rudeness. I don't know anybody that would describe their home church where they place membership as anything other than friendly. But the reality is that each of us reaches those judgments based on personal experience. And unfortunatly, for visitors, those judgments are typically drawn and reached based on one Sunday only.
To go as far as labeling it racism, you would probably have to experience or hear a racial slur, or some such thing. As a white male, my personal belief (and I know this is just a difference in perception and my perceptions are no more of less valid than yours, so don't get angry with me here) is that many racial minorities probably attribute a lot of things "not going their way" as racism when, in fact, that wasn't the motive at all behind somebody's bahavior (or in your case, lack of behavior).
I would be honest with your friend. Tell her you are glad she enjoys the church so much but that you are not sure it is the right church for you. If she presses you or persists, be honest with her and tell her you didn't feel the warmth she described when you attended. If they are honest, self-assessing God loving people, perhaps that feedback will get back to the greeters and they can do a better job with the next visitors. If this was my church, I would want you to be honest with me and I assume your friend, assuming she is a person of spiritual maturity, will also appreciate your honesty.
2006-12-06 05:07:14 · answer #1 · answered by lmnop 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not racist, just rude. Chances are you were being sized up. I'm black and I get the same treatment when I go to some friend's church's too. For whatever reason, a lot of black churches really have a "you are an outsider" mentality, especially if they have never seen you before. The one place that's supposed to make you feel at home, makes you feel like like a heathen. And it's the people inside who do that. A lot of gossip mongers love to go to church and talk about everyone and their mother before and after service. During service they will hoot and holler and act like the Lord caters to them personally. :-)
Please don't let it get to you. Go anyway and enjoy the service and go and hear the word. If anything, it will strengthen you and your friend's friendship.
2006-12-06 07:09:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably not racist. The same thing happened to my wife and I when we attempted to visit her childhood church.
They were, however, more than glad to accept our money but it seemed that we were not worth the word 'Hello'.
Go figure.
Our new church, the United Methodist Church, does not seem to be this way. I couldn't even hide in the back row and sneak out after service. Everyone in the place came by and shook my hand.
2006-12-06 05:01:02 · answer #3 · answered by credo quia est absurdum 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't really say on just one visit. If you went back again and they did they same thing, then you might have cause for concern. True love for fellow man elevates us above all color lines. We are all created in God's image and everyone that adheres to his principles and laws is acceptable to him, so we should all have the same mindset. I can understand by them not greeting you would have made you felt uncomfortable. If you decide to go next time, you could ask your friend to introduce you and that might break the ice.
2006-12-06 05:12:52 · answer #4 · answered by Level424me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no your accurate! If I made moist and in elementary words white human beings must be on it then i must be shot useless the first day. I do ought to assert bough that blacks feelthat they have had hardships because of their dermis colour so wager replaced right into a huge milestone for them. So i do not comprehend truly. Whites somewhat a lot personal fox information.
2016-11-30 05:24:17 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it was racist. The best thing to do when your ask your friend to join you again is say no. Tell her the truth when she asks why. If you don't feel comfortable, especially at church, then you just shouldn't go there. Good Luck.
2006-12-06 05:00:48 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i went to a white church and it was like that, i don't think it's necessarily racists however, you are new to that area, and probably are thinking who is this girl. However it wasn't right, and for it to happen at a church is even worst.
2006-12-06 04:54:21 · answer #7 · answered by champagne b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you must tell your friend the truth about how you felt you were treated . Its her duty to make sure that she does her best to see you comfortable among people she is asking you to mingle...and if this is not solved...no big deal just DON"T GO
2006-12-06 05:02:11 · answer #8 · answered by serengeti 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes people feel that this is a black church or white church and you don't belong here.
2006-12-06 05:00:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
was just rude stupid pple...not racism.
iam black in spain and i get that all the time.when i go to the church or other gatherings.
2006-12-06 05:50:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋