What would Santa really say......?

Question

If Santa answered his mail honestly...

Dear Santa
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer
yer Frend,
JaKe

Dear Jake,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
Santa

Dear Santa,
I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!
Love,
Sarah

Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?
Santa

Dear Santa,
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do?
Love,
Teddy

Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his *** constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Santa

Answer 1

now that is funny!

Answer 2

Believing in Santa became into between the terrific issues approximately Christmas while i became right into a sprint youngster. even once I found out he wasn't genuine, i did no longer care... because of the fact for 10 years, i've got self assurance he became into genuine.. and it became into very magical. i became into on no account mad at my parents for "mendacity" to me... I thoroughly understood that they simply needed me to have a happy and relaxing adolescence. i actually advise which you go mutually along with her father and cope along with her like a 5 twelve months previous... there is not any choose for her to quit believing in Santa and provide up what could be a happy and jolly adolescence.

Answer 3

haha those are kinda funny (and a little mean lol)

Answer 4

Lol.
You sure you didn't mean "What would Satan really say?"

Answer 5

HA! :)