Grieving time over loss of spouse?

Question

I know grieving is an individual thing but I'm interested in other's experienced who have lost a spouse after many years of marriage. I have lost mine 6 months ago. I'm interested in experiences of others. Just how long did the deep grieving process last. Again I know it's an individual thing

Answer 1

Yes I would think it's an individual thing certainly,and I can't say from experiance of looseing a wife the way you lost, but I was married way back and she left me for another, this rocked my world to the core, I was no good for anyone for many years even though I thought I was. In my opinion 6 months is not near enough time for healing any person you are with wont fill the shoes of what you want or need. I am very happy now and Married for the second time but it was after 13 years of trial and error I found myself and was able to give all of myself to another ,I wish I had lived those 13 years completly alone it would have certainly saved myself and others alot of pain.If you persue another now it will seem real and in reality will simply be a rebound and you will hurt someone. Focus on other things right now hold and cheerish your spouces memory at this time have friends and dont pursue a relationship now. There is no set time but 6 months is not near enough time trust me.Personally if my wife were gone tomorrow I would probably live the rest of my life alone honoring her and what we had. God bless I hope you find peace but peace at this time with another isn't the answer. You know you sparked a memory I have from 1988 , I was in church with my soon to be wife at the time and the Preacher introduced my future wife and I to the people of the church, after the mass we shook hands with alot of people congradulating us, this one young man walked up to me he was about my age , he congradulated me and then he said something I will never ever forget, he said I lost my wife 6 months ago she was killed in a car wreck, I for that brief few seconds felt all his pain could see how horrible this was for him, I was speechless at the time but that really made me apreaciate things we do have more, I wont ever forget that, Again God Bless

Answer 2

Never lost my spouse, however I lost someone even more closer my teenage daughter. And 4 years later I am still missing her dearly. It does get easier to cope as the days go by, and their are always the times when you have moments that are sad. However I know that she is good and I will be back with her again. Get back into a new groove, because your life has changed and you must move on and its not easy. I truly hope this helps.

Answer 3

I'm so sorry for your loss. May light and love be with you all the time.

I would say it's a day by day thing. I know of a woman who had been married 30 years and her husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and gone in 6 months. 4 years later, she still grieves for him and misses him.

Hang in there.

Answer 4

My father passed away 1 year and 2 months ago. For my mother (and all of us), the first year was a state of complete depression. Lately things have been looking up. It's important to go through the greiving process, and in time you will learn to accept that life must go on & that he will always be with us. It was stages... shock, then anger, then sadness & then in time you learn to appreciate all the memories you've shared and even smile, remembering the good times. It takes time, but gets easier in time.

Answer 5

It took me 6 years to accept my deceased fiancé's death, and although I remarried after 7 years, I know there are still healing parts. I usually ignore my feelings out of respecting my husband but there are times... Like this morning where a little memory crossed my mind (one that I rarely think of) and I cried for a second. Not because I felt like I was "grieving" but its normal to miss our deceased loved ones.. Even after we are done grieving. For me it took 6 years to accept it but I can't erase the fact that I lost one of my best friends in life. But I am not holding onto his life either.

Answer 6

it is usually around a year but my 1 st husband died after 18 yrs of being married and i was only 36. so i was a widow young . but I was the exception i was very young and my 2 boys did not want me to remarry at all and they still dont . I have the opportunity to marry but I probably will not remarry out of respect for them although they are grown.good luck and god bless and happy holidays.

Answer 7

i've never lost a spouse, but when i went thru another loss some-one gave me a book "how to survive the loss of a love"...any bookstore should have it...it might answer some of your questions

Answer 8

I'm really sorry for you lost. i can't even imagine losing my wife. GOD will help you and bring the hap pines in to you life again.GOD BLESS YOU and good luck

Answer 9

Wow I am sorry to hear that. Probaly awhile or a lifetime depending on how long you were together.

Answer 10

when my dad died, i was 3. when my mom got with my stepdad, i was 6. she had a boyfriend in between.