I'm trying to understand why she got mad at that because she says she contemplates it sometimes we've had some arguments and all. I told her she should go ahead and have her fun, cos internally I'm to the point where I feel I won't miss much. She got mad at that and I wonder why she would bcos if she's thinking about it, then i feel she could care less if I give a damn or not.And just in case anyone is wondering, I am NOT having an affair or anything, sometimes you get so frustrated you could care less.
2006-12-06 01:30:06 · 16 answers · asked by Blk Angel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am directing this to those women who feel that what i said was cold. If the tables were turned and a man said that to you, would you or would you not feel that this is a very cheap, tactless way of getting attention if he "really" doesn't mean it? Just curious bcos I am trying to understand women a little more. I really thought that it is ok for a woman to cheat if she isnt getting attention or she is feeling ignored, the world makes it seem it is ok. And sometimes it gets to the point where one becomes fed up and jaded. I figure its a free world, and a woman should be allowed to have her fun if she wants to. -- I apologize if I sound like a cold person, really i am not, i am just a man who has been put through a lot of crap and it has been building up for a while.
2006-12-06 02:36:00 · update #1
If a man said that to me I would probably think there was something wrong with our relatiinship. Something huge! I would never respond by telling him to go and cheat unless I was done with him. I think that it is a cold response. (although in your relationship it may have been deserved--only you really know that)
If she was threatening you with it she probably doesn't want to do it. She just needed your attention, reassurance that you love her, some sign that you actually care. you managed to give her none of them.
Sounds like you both need counseling if you want to make the marriage work.
If you feel you have put up with too much perhaps it is time to walk away. Most marriages go through hard times but sometimes they can never be repaired.
2006-12-06 01:36:29 · answer #1 · answered by artimis 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why, you awful old meanie, you -you called her bluff! Jeez, you were supposed to get all teary and beg her to stay home and true to you an whine and cry and - well, by not doing so you completely deflated her big ol' balloon.
Just for the record, most married women do think about the possibility of an extramarital fling, just as we guys do - although for most of them it never goes beyond thinking about it. Also, most women never tell their mates that they've thought about it. Those who do so are telling "the other half" that the marriage isn't what they (the one doing the telling) would like for it to be. If you value your marriage at all, it would pay to listen, and then, without getting all hot and bothered, ask what you might do TOGETHER to make things better. If you can't address that issue without getting upset, then it is probably better to talk divorce.
2006-12-06 01:41:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Them type of threats are never good. My ex did the same, but she was cheating. What's funny is she was engaged to the other guy within a week of us breaking up and they moved to another state together. I feel sorry for the guy. He got the sh-t end of the stick.
Never trust women who make these threats. They're not mentally healthy when it comes to relationships. And don't listen to the, 'she was trying to get your attention' thing. If she wants attention, she can do it the nice way, instead of saying she's going to whore around.
2006-12-06 03:17:10 · answer #3 · answered by Nep 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's kind of childish for her to say that. Just because she thinks it doesn't mean she'll do anything, but it still is a sigh that something is wrong. You are probably not giving her the attention she needs and she mistakenly thought by saying that you would show some interest. I guess you failed cause you didn't. I would be furious if the man I love would say that to me. Something like that would catch my attention. I do not know why she wasn't able to catch yours. Maybe you don't love her anymore or don't want to be with her. She was wrong to say that but your reaction was just as weird. "Just my point of view" Good Luck
2006-12-06 01:37:52 · answer #4 · answered by martica595500 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well by her telling you what she was going to do, and that is she was trying to be honest with you, she was fishing around to see what kind of reaction you would have to something so crazy! Do you realize you basically told her to go because you don't care enough about her to actually find out what the problem is?!!!!
This is probably the exact reason for her unhappiness! Come on man, try to decide if you care about her enough to help this situation instead of making it worse for you and her. She would probably not tell you if she wasn't really concerned about your relationship.
Go talk to her and let her know you are there to listen and do just that!
2006-12-06 01:40:20 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Instead of her running off and cheating to correct whatever problems you two are having, have you guys considered counseling? or a trial separation? I'm sorry, I just don't see cheating as a way to solve a problem. It's possible she told you that because she needs to hear you tell her that you really do love her and don't want her to find someone else. Have you told her you love her lately? Try telling her that you really don't want her to do that, but if she feels the need to do that, then should you consider the marriage over?
2006-12-06 01:38:51 · answer #6 · answered by angeleyes 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
she probably reacted because she didn't mean it and she wanted to know how much you care, but why would she go to that extent of threatening to cheat on you? i think something has gone wrong somewhere try as the man of the house to put things right. Do you communicate properly? there is a difference between communicating and talking. so find a solution, it lies within you two
2006-12-06 01:37:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She got mad because she still loves you and by you telling her to have fun, told her that you could care less about her. And since that is obviously the case, why are you still with her? Your wife is hurting and it is soon to turn into hating.
2006-12-06 01:39:03 · answer #8 · answered by Therese 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Of course she got mad when she realized that cheating on you would not make you jealous , you just would not care. Naturally she wants you to care for her and about her and your answer told her you just don´t give a damn. Seek counseling if you want to stay married!
2006-12-06 01:37:55 · answer #9 · answered by Eileen 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If your not happy, why bother staying? Obviously shes not happy either. If y'all are staying together because children are involved, its not healthy at all. The kids will see whats going on and thats teaching them its ok to act the y'all are. Leave and find someone who loves you for who you are.
2006-12-06 01:33:00 · answer #10 · answered by PfcsBaby 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋